but i need to avoid something.
i have no idea what's making me sick. i have been sick now for about a week. throat is somewhat sore, and has gotten worse. i'm thinking now it's allergy- the most recent symptoms. i have no fucking clue. laundry detergent? thought about that. i'm allergic to coconut and my one detergent although free and clear is made from coconut oil, and i react to a drop of coconut oil (orally).
the best i felt, recently, was when i didn't shower for two days or so. this would mean i didn't open up my pours, and dry off with a towel that might still have coconut oil residue in it... but i did change clothes (not underwear)... my reaction wasn't as bad. ...
tonight .. i took a shower about a couple of hours ago.. and right now i'm experiencing a bad sore throat on my left side which is consistent with allergic reactions to orally ingested or breathed in particles of food..
but i'm wondering what the cause is. hemp? unlikely. still feel this is highly unlikely. no hemp seed allergies have ever been officially reported. i just changed my detergent. i'm washing all of my clothes with soap nuts- which i also believed at one time to cause a reaction in me. I could use another detergent.. from tide.. i don't believe i react to it even though i know it's made with both corn and coconut oil- both that i'm allergic to.. but i don't or didn't react to it before.. soap nuts? people with multiple chemical sensitivities use these.. i shouldn't be allergic... plus i barely touched them, to put them in the bag and into the laundry. they weren't wet, either. i can touch milk, one of my worst offenders, and not get a reaction most of the time..
but coconut oil.. . is an oil. it gets into the skin, and perhaps some protein residue finds its way in, too.. but this is the worst i've felt.. the worst reaction i have felt.. tonight!
i don't know.
if i could in perfection, i would approach gateway to deconstruction/disassembly/death.
what new tonight? soap nuts... and going through checkout just moments ago .. with a lady that covers herself in make-up and perfume and smells from six feet away. i've suspected perfumes and colognes as a causer of my suffering as well, but i often try to go back on it and say "no it's not that.".. but i don't know.
i wish god would open up a portal and say "game over, if you want."
i have no idea what's making me sick. i have been sick now for about a week. throat is somewhat sore, and has gotten worse. i'm thinking now it's allergy- the most recent symptoms. i have no fucking clue. laundry detergent? thought about that. i'm allergic to coconut and my one detergent although free and clear is made from coconut oil, and i react to a drop of coconut oil (orally).
the best i felt, recently, was when i didn't shower for two days or so. this would mean i didn't open up my pours, and dry off with a towel that might still have coconut oil residue in it... but i did change clothes (not underwear)... my reaction wasn't as bad. ...
tonight .. i took a shower about a couple of hours ago.. and right now i'm experiencing a bad sore throat on my left side which is consistent with allergic reactions to orally ingested or breathed in particles of food..
but i'm wondering what the cause is. hemp? unlikely. still feel this is highly unlikely. no hemp seed allergies have ever been officially reported. i just changed my detergent. i'm washing all of my clothes with soap nuts- which i also believed at one time to cause a reaction in me. I could use another detergent.. from tide.. i don't believe i react to it even though i know it's made with both corn and coconut oil- both that i'm allergic to.. but i don't or didn't react to it before.. soap nuts? people with multiple chemical sensitivities use these.. i shouldn't be allergic... plus i barely touched them, to put them in the bag and into the laundry. they weren't wet, either. i can touch milk, one of my worst offenders, and not get a reaction most of the time..
but coconut oil.. . is an oil. it gets into the skin, and perhaps some protein residue finds its way in, too.. but this is the worst i've felt.. the worst reaction i have felt.. tonight!
i don't know.
if i could in perfection, i would approach gateway to deconstruction/disassembly/death.
what new tonight? soap nuts... and going through checkout just moments ago .. with a lady that covers herself in make-up and perfume and smells from six feet away. i've suspected perfumes and colognes as a causer of my suffering as well, but i often try to go back on it and say "no it's not that.".. but i don't know.
i wish god would open up a portal and say "game over, if you want."
