You're obviously much much more experienced than I am but looking at psychedelic spiritual experiences as maybe being 'true' or maybe being an 'illusion' seems strange to me tbh. Its an experience that you had that was meaningful to you - isnt that enough?
LOL - Of course it is. But at the time that I began to explore this realm (30 years ago) I was the only person I knew doing so. I had no-one to share any of my thoughts or feelings with. And I certainly had no-one to talk with who shared the insight that you just voiced. Your kind of acceptance of my experience, regardless of whether it were fact or fantasy, would have been enough to make the question lose its urgency, if not its value.
But what I was faced with was having discovered something that inspired me to feeling more excited about it, that anything I had done before, and it was significant enough for me to want to share the experiences, or perceptions thereof, but I was met with derision and ridicule by those who had never been anywhere truly magical, and refused to accept even the possibility that a drug induced experience could ever be more than a delusion, and inferred that I, by subscribing to it, was in need of psychological help, and a rehabilitation clinic.
And so finding a way of validating my perceptions became important to me, as I was starting to feel extremely isolated. Nitrous was perceived to be along the lines of the more toxic inhalants, and the stigma forced me into solitude.
Had I been a young man in the here and now - everything about the way I approached things would have been different - bluelight was the first place I found that I was able to express myself without being automatically judged.
But given my extensive experience, I still believe that I have had insights that are still worth sharing, and I very much enjoy writing psychedelic stories, experiences, and philosophy, so while 'proof' is not an issue, the ability to coherently express the extremely bizarre and abstract still is - and given the fact that the nature of Nitrous is to forget it shortly after it has happened, makes the endeavour of linguistically describing it quite the challenge.
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