I had an epiphany this morning, possibly the strongest one I've ever had: I finally found my place in the world, and it's with EDM (electronic dance music for those who aren't familiar with it). A few years ago, I thought it was with extreme sports, and I still did up until this morning. But as much as I love extreme sports, I wasn't truly happy with my place in the industry. I loved DOING them, but the job I had only required me to be at events... and at times, it felt like a chore to be there.
But EDM... I love everything about it. Even when I'm just around it, I'm happy. I love listening to it, making it, going to shows, talking about it, promoting it... everything. To give you a clearer picture of how important it actually is to me, it was my reason to get off of heroin, to get through the withdrawals, it's my reason to STAY off of it. In fact, I see being a junkie as part of some sort of distant past. It was only a little over a month ago that I quit, but it doesn't have a place in my life anymore. It doesn't fit in with where I see my life going, in fact it will ruin it, and for that I hate the drug more than anything.
I don't see the last few years I spent on it as a waste though. Don't regret anything. When I was 14, I decided I wanted to work for Drive-Thru Records and eventually have a record label of my own... I even wrote out a (shitty) business plan lol. When I was 18, I began managing my boyfriend at the time and his band. Of course that ended when we broke up hah. When I was 20, I officially changed my major to music business and started to actually enjoy going to classes. Then at 22, I lost everything to opiates, so that I could learn to appreciate life and never waste time again, because every moment is an opportunity.
It's like my whole life has been to prepare me for what I'm about to do. I've been wandering around aimlessly for most of it, never really sure of where I belonged. But when I figured this out, something amazinf happened: I finally forgave myself, found my purpose, became driven and passionate again, understood my self-worth, and every fear/worry/anxiety instantly disappeared. It's like I knew it all along and I just had to stop and realize, "oh yeah... THIS is what I've been chasing after all this time." It's hard for me to doubt the concept of divine intervention when I look at how... just so PERFECT and right this is. How my whole life has been preparing me for this.
Suddenly there's not enough time in the world. So thank you, EDM, for helping me save my own life.
But EDM... I love everything about it. Even when I'm just around it, I'm happy. I love listening to it, making it, going to shows, talking about it, promoting it... everything. To give you a clearer picture of how important it actually is to me, it was my reason to get off of heroin, to get through the withdrawals, it's my reason to STAY off of it. In fact, I see being a junkie as part of some sort of distant past. It was only a little over a month ago that I quit, but it doesn't have a place in my life anymore. It doesn't fit in with where I see my life going, in fact it will ruin it, and for that I hate the drug more than anything.
I don't see the last few years I spent on it as a waste though. Don't regret anything. When I was 14, I decided I wanted to work for Drive-Thru Records and eventually have a record label of my own... I even wrote out a (shitty) business plan lol. When I was 18, I began managing my boyfriend at the time and his band. Of course that ended when we broke up hah. When I was 20, I officially changed my major to music business and started to actually enjoy going to classes. Then at 22, I lost everything to opiates, so that I could learn to appreciate life and never waste time again, because every moment is an opportunity.
It's like my whole life has been to prepare me for what I'm about to do. I've been wandering around aimlessly for most of it, never really sure of where I belonged. But when I figured this out, something amazinf happened: I finally forgave myself, found my purpose, became driven and passionate again, understood my self-worth, and every fear/worry/anxiety instantly disappeared. It's like I knew it all along and I just had to stop and realize, "oh yeah... THIS is what I've been chasing after all this time." It's hard for me to doubt the concept of divine intervention when I look at how... just so PERFECT and right this is. How my whole life has been preparing me for this.
Suddenly there's not enough time in the world. So thank you, EDM, for helping me save my own life.