Harm Reduction Telling parents about hardcore addiction

[danosaurous22]

Just curious if you have gone down this path. I recently admitted to them that I need to talk about something and that things have not been good financially and mentally, and they were immediately understanding and I've made arrangements to talk with them more specifically this weekend. But I don't know what to do. They were very understanding about how I have wasted several large paychecks in a row-- this time, it only took a few days to clean out freshly received 2k, and they were still very forgiving and seemed to just want me to feel better and get on the right track. But I haven't brought up the drug component yet and I'm very scared to because I think it will scar their view of me forever and make me forever a source of serious serious concern for them, they are very anxious and care about me so much that the thought I have been rolling the dice so recklessly might really freak them out and I don't know how they will react. Or maybe they can tell something is up drug wise, I live far away and don't stay in touch often but they see me every now and then and have seen me on the tail end of binges before.

What experience do you have with this? I'm scared that it could just spiral us all into a panic that is not good for us, and I fear I will freak out if they freak out and end up trying to escape everything again. But they do care, and I also feel I owe them an explanation. The truth is really beyond the pale though. I have spent an absurd amount of money and time on this, and the binges are on the extreme end of things. Cocaine is also just a scary drug that people don't understand, and the health problems are very very real, so it freaks out people close to me when I tell them even a bit of the truth.