Tapering off of poppy pods

[QuasiStoned]

HEMP, that sounds like a pretty standard withdrawal symptoms if you ask me. I never got the sweating too badly when in WD, although I did have one terrible experience with 1,4 BDO (prodrug for GHB if you are unfamiliar) where I passed out and released an enormous amount of sweat on my bed. I woke up soaked, got out of bed to turn off the porn I had blaring (lol, GHB seems to make a lot of people horny, myself included) and when I lay back down and the sweat was cold I realized that my mattress sheet was completely soaked, along with my pillow. It was absolutely disgusting, I couldn't believe how gross it felt.

Sorry I can't offer any real advice though. I can sympathize with how strange and gross of a symptom it is though

 

[Help me please]

HEMP, that sounds like a pretty standard withdrawal symptoms if you ask me. I never got the sweating too badly when in WD, although I did have one terrible experience with 1,4 BDO (prodrug for GHB if you are unfamiliar) where I passed out and released an enormous amount of sweat on my bed. I woke up soaked, got out of bed to turn off the porn I had blaring (lol, GHB seems to make a lot of people horny, myself included) and when I lay back down and the sweat was cold I realized that my mattress sheet was completely soaked, along with my pillow. It was absolutely disgusting, I couldn't believe how gross it felt.

Sorry I can't offer any real advice though. I can sympathize with how strange and gross of a symptom it is though

It wasn't gross really. It was spots the size of an orange maybe. Here and there kind of thing. Not like sweating out a fever though. I went right back to sleep and got up for meds at 8 and then back to bed till 10:30 am so I am not having the insomnia I got last time. I actually just got up from an hour nap too. I feel better now than I did this morning but still a bit anxious. I think I am making myself sick in a way!

 

[Bojangles69]

I use to sweat A LOT when I first started tapering, I actually sweat before the taper too just from coming down from higher doses. But it was every night almost that I'd wake up in sweats or wake up in the morning drenched like I had peed all overmyself. It seemed its worse when I first started dropping doses, even though I still sweat a lot today. Its just the volume of perspiration that has reduced.
Clonidine is prob number one for the sweats, so I'm surprised you're even having them with the patch. If it ever gets bad I hear carbs can help somewhat. Oatmeal is like a supersponge that will influx your blood with insulin which pulls water into your blood to move the insulin into cells. So as your body is processing the carbs water will have a higher affinity to stay in your body. If you're not eating any starchy carbs at all, then water will have a problem staying in your system. Its really the adrenaline that causes it though, so realistically if clonidine doesn't stop it eating carbs prob won't stop it either.

I think the scientific name for it is "hyperhydrosis" and theres many ways to control it besides clonidine. I know other people get aluminum chloride (its like a salt) and rub it all over their skin, as thats the active ingredient in deodorant and is a natural antiperspirant. But I'm still surprised you're sweating at all with the low blood pressure you tend to have AND clonidine. So that would tell me if you DO get it, it should never really get too out of control.
You already said it wasn't a lot of sweat, so I wouldn't worry about it too much.

 

[Help me please]

I use to sweat A LOT when I first started tapering, I actually sweat before the taper too just from coming down from higher doses. But it was every night almost that I'd wake up in sweats or wake up in the morning drenched like I had peed all overmyself. It seemed its worse when I first started dropping doses, even though I still sweat a lot today. Its just the volume of perspiration that has reduced.
Clonidine is prob number one for the sweats, so I'm surprised you're even having them with the patch. If it ever gets bad I hear carbs can help somewhat. Oatmeal is like a supersponge that will influx your blood with insulin which pulls water into your blood to move the insulin into cells. So as your body is processing the carbs water will have a higher affinity to stay in your body. If you're not eating any starchy carbs at all, then water will have a problem staying in your system. Its really the adrenaline that causes it though, so realistically if clonidine doesn't stop it eating carbs prob won't stop it either.

I think the scientific name for it is "hyperhydrosis" and theres many ways to control it besides clonidine. I know other people get aluminum chloride (its like a salt) and rub it all over their skin, as thats the active ingredient in deodorant and is a natural antiperspirant. But I'm still surprised you're sweating at all with the low blood pressure you tend to have AND clonidine. So that would tell me if you DO get it, it should never really get too out of control.
You already said it wasn't a lot of sweat, so I wouldn't worry about it too much.

Bo I am a type 1 diabetic meaning I live on insulin because I don't make any to speak of. Also I was not sweating. The moisture was on the bed but not on me. I don't really sweat much to begin with.

I think this is WD though. Granted not as bad as last month but still WD. I need to know how long each round will last. I last dropped a dose on the 14th. This is the 17th. Why now? If I drop again tomorrow as per Ham's taper what will happen? Will I feel this way till I am off the meds or even a week more than that? I f'in hate this shit!


I guess I wonder why I got sick last night or whatever that was. I mean my 8 am and midnight doses are still at 30 mg each which is full dose. Only the 4 pm dose has been cut to 15 mg. So with a 30 mg last night and this morning why the F am I symptomatic???

 

[Bojangles69]

Bo I am a type 1 diabetic meaning I live on insulin because I don't make any to speak of. Also I was not sweating. The moisture was on the bed but not on me. I don't really sweat much to begin with.

I think this is WD though. Granted not as bad as last month but still WD. I need to know how long each round will last. I last dropped a dose on the 14th. This is the 17th. Why now? If I drop again tomorrow as per Ham's taper what will happen? Will I feel this way till I am off the meds or even a week more than that? I f'in hate this shit!


I guess I wonder why I got sick last night or whatever that was. I mean my 8 am and midnight doses are still at 30 mg each which is full dose. Only the 4 pm dose has been cut to 15 mg. So with a 30 mg last night and this morning why the F am I symptomatic???

Well I think what happens is in the begining of the taper it takes longer for the wds to initially catch up because you kinda have a residue of morphine deposited all long the fats in your skin and other places (its like a dormant form of morphine that your brain can't process untill its released).
When the morphine levels initially drop, adrenaline is triggered which speeds up your metabolism. That quicker metabolism will also aid in removing morphine salts that are store in fat (although morphine isn't bad compared to something like sub as sub loves storing in fats). So initially you're gonna have tiny amounts of morphine melting out from your entire body, which can still somewhat trick your receptors into not feeling it as quickly.

So what happens is once all that crap clears out, you start to feel drops the next day. I would give your body like a week or maybe even more though before that happens. But I think it will be faster personally as you shouldn't have much stored in your fats to begin.
You WILL feel drops instantly the next day once the wheels of the taper have been in motion for a little bit, just that there are other things going on right now besides just dropping doses.
Also, pay VERY close attention to your wds. I'm sure you already are. But there is NO NEED to suffer more than a minor cold while going through this process. If you ever need to up your dose, don't compensate by taking 5mg hours later, save that 5mg to stack on top of your next actual dose.

Remember there are no free rides ever in coming off any opiate. You are bound to experience some negative symptoms, but compared to the avg user on this forum, they will very much be minor and easily controlled. Another thing you can do is take a bit of grapefruit juice with your dose, it will prevent the morphine from breaking down too quick as grapefruity juice will directly keep the enzymes that break morphine down occupied. You won't have to up your dose, but obviously its just going to delay the tapering process... just like upping your dose would anyway. But its something you can do w/out having to just withdraw from a larger does tommorow. These first couple of weeks you are basically going to be finding out if this taper can actually work for you, and its not really till you revise things to suit your body that it becomes more comfortable.
You are still very much in the guinea pig stages still is what I'm saying. Just please be strong and we will be here to help you at the snap of your fingers =]

-Bo

edit: and only because I recently recieved some Kanna myself, if your anxiety gets worse at any point GET KANNA! L-tyrosine is suppose to be good too, but kanna is immediately active and strong, and I've never heard about anyone experiencing anything negative from it (although god knows if you stay on anything long enough your bound to experience some kind of wds)

 

[Help me please]

Bo I am sure I cannot take anything unknown to me now (Kanna). My fears would not allow it.

I am not worried about taking more to correct how I feel. I will stand an extra day or two but not backslide at all. I took the 15 mg at 4 and an hour and a half later my anxiety is lessened. Not sure how long that will last but I'll take any minute that is calm.

I don't think there really is a difference in WD pain for people unless it is a matter of taper to C/T. WD is WD. I may not have all the same symptoms I had when I went from oxymorphone and norco to plain fast acting morphine but the anxiety level was the same either way. I assume the clonidine is helping since those are the only smptoms I have now.

28 more days and I will be done with these pills either way. If I have to stand tomorrow then add another day to that.

 

[unsettled]

Hey Guys,

Thanks for your concern, I appreciate it. I've cut down the H use to one hit in the morning and one at night. Also I stopped smoking it because of the mental obsession with the ritual part, I now just take a tiny piece, dissolve it in water and snort it. It seems to come on slower and last longer this way. I'm using tramadol during the day and that helps alot.

I realize there is a honeymoon period with H even when you're experienced with other opiates, and indulged for a couple days. I know how fast people go downhill when their world begins to revolve around H, I've witnessed it many times first hand and it ain't pretty. I'm supposed to be getting some subs in a couple days, I can't afford a dr. appointment for another week. Believe me I'm realizing first hand how slippery of a slope H is and want to quit now more than ever. If all else fails I'll go back to pods but I'm just sick of those things with their hundred different alkaloids and would prefer to get off this shit with the assistance of a medical professional. My last two attempts at tapering have failed, so I need to try another more structured way.

Anyway, just checking in, I'm doing good all things considered. I'm not giving up, just maintaining on as little as possible until I can get on subs.

On a side note I have to reiterate the point that H doesn't feel much different from pods when it comes right down to it, the actual high is almost identical, the main difference is that it hits quicker and gives you a rush when you smoke it. Once the rush disappears I feel very similar to how I felt on pods. Pods don't have the bad rap that H does but (good) Pods are as strong as the H I've been getting. I'm sure IV use is a whole different ballgame but I have no desire to go there.

 

[HamClamp]

^ Thanks for checking in-you know how I worry ;-) Actually I DO kinda worry!

I'm so glad to hear that you're keeping the H thing in check. I also have a great respect for you for knowing when it's time to seek professional help. If this taper didn't get me where I neded to be or if I should relapse down the road I'm gonna do the same thing- hit up a professional.

Hang in there, be careful, and keep fighting. It'll be worth it and you'll be glad you did it.

Rootin' for you!

**************

I'm hanging. Woke up wound UP. Heart literally pounding. Now tht I'm up I feel better- I think I was dreaming or something.

Energy level is at an all-time high. Almost manic/hyper yet come evening bored at the same time. The days are a LOT longer now and it bugs me. I'm trying to work my way down to an earlier bedtime but that's not working out too well. Most nights I fall asleep in my recliner, wake up with a sore stiff back, and shuffle off to bed. I'm catching 4-5-6 hours sleep so I'm good there.

I honestly think the L-Tyrosine/B6/5-HTP is helping with my mood/depression. Each day I seem to feel a little better/a little more positive.

I feel pretty good all in all. It is starting to feel like it's been worth it.

*****

Hang in there everyone- go slow, listen to your body, be patient, and just keep at it. It DOES get better.

Peace.

 

[Help me please]

Morning all. Slept great last night with no sweats at all. No anxiety so far except for those little minute long panic attacks. I can usually just fan my face with both hands and make that stop. Going to take is easy today. Still plan on dropping the 4 pm dose to 7.5 mg as scheduled. Hoping to find a pattern in all this mess so I can at least anticipate what will happen and for how long and when. If I only have to deal with sweats on occasion and full day anxiety every so often I could live with that. I know this bout of anxiety that had me worried was only day long.

 

[Bojangles69]

Cool looks like everyone is doing good, and unsettled do me a favor and stay the EFF AWAY from that H ok? =]
Not because you can't throw your life away on pods cause you can, but H is far too impulsive of an opiate. I remember the rush I use to get from speed and if H is even close to that (intensity wise) I would be deathly afraid of it. Those few seconds when you are high out of your mind can literally cause almost a form of OCD where all you do is think and dream about the rush.
Its a large part psychological that rush, so I'd definitely say the sooner you can just stop abusing it the better you will be. Do whatever you got to to stay well, but I'd definitely stay away from at least smoking it. I remember how big a piece of shit I use to feel like taking hits of speed, the pipe shaking so hard I couldn't even get it in my mouth, and the second the high would fade away my world just sucked, and it turns into such a sick ritual it soon consumes your entire life.

I notice I can still be on opiates, but having even just a little bit of control over them really changes the way you'll feel about yourself. There is no shittier feeling in the world than that tital wave of temptation that keeps drawing you towards a drug you feel powerless over. It really makes you feel like a piece of shit, and sometimes when you can't shake that feeling your only choice is to keep using over and over.
Just try sticking to an opiate that will keep your receptors happy w/out freezing your heart over like its the iceage. You've already demonstrated how important you know it is, and it seems you are on the right track as far as your thoughts go, I just wanted to offer a little more reinforcement so maybe its easier to not abuse the H. Just try to stay comfortable and if you feel like you gotta skull 5 bags to your face, take a break and go do something else. Come back to the H later when you're in a better mindset. But whatever you do just focus on keeping that control, its definitely something you don't wanna lose because once its gone it can be near impossible to get back again.

G/luck!!!

 

[Help me please]

Well just some very random bouts of anxiety today that came and went in moments. I admit I got nervous about the drop and rather than go from 15 mg to 7.5 mg at 4 pm, I got the pill cutter out and chopped off a 1/4 so I took 11.25 mg instead. I think if all goes well I will then drop to 7.5 mg on Saturday.

I have a family member coming on Sunday to stay hopefully a week or more which will be of great comfort to me. I need to quit focusing on tapering 24/7. I think I must dream about it too. I know that once I get a pattern figured out I will be fine again. Didn't Bo first come out here seeking a pattern too? It must be a flight or fight response if I am not the only one who did.

Ham keeps telling me it won't be near as bad this time as that first WD and I DO believe him. Once again for anyone who does not know me yet...I am a chicken shit I am a worrier too.

 

[Bojangles69]

And now I'll do a quick update about my own situation.

My meds will be here anyday now, can be tommorow for all I know so I'm gonna start posting in my thread again when they come. I just need to finish that thread with me feeling stable off opiates because that was the original goal to stay off opiates, not just get 8 days clean.

I already like the way I'm feeling today and its because my Kanna and Phenibut came. I've realize phenibut is EXTREMELY effective not just for sleep and anxiety, but at actually keeping my blood pressure down too. Its somewhat of a traquilizer I think. I've read all the horror stories of addiction on it so anytime I use it for 3 days straight I will take 3 days off. And plus I'm only taking 500mg which is a low enough amount.

I also took .5gms of Kanna today and I'm simply amazed how well its working. I didn't have any hot flashes or fatigue today, and because of that I just totally wound up skipping my sub dose. Theres no risk of addiction to Kanna so I'll be using it much more liberally than the phenibut. But it has me very much feeling normal and thats even w/out any sub. I'm gonna wake up tommorow and see if any RLS manifests, and if not I'll prob just take another 500mg phenibut and .5gms kanna.
I think at some point my body will start driving itself back into insomnia w/out the sub, but I'm just gonna take it day by day and see what happens. For all I know these 2 herbs alone could work some magic.
So its still very much an experimental phase, but I do kinda wanna see what my new sleep cycle will be like after staying on a low dose of sub for almost 2 weeks now.

Worst case scenario the detox meds should be here anyday, but the less of them that I need that happier I'll be in the end. I only have a 2 week supply of everything but I kinda wanted to save half for when school starts. Having a bit of clonidine before class will help ease any bit of residual anxiety because I know just being off the pods now my anxiety levels will most likely be higher than normal. But usually after the first couple weeks of class most my anxiety fades away after everyone gets to know each other.

So today was actually a great day, I had energy, I felt good, and I didn't take sub. These little herbs are miracle workers but in 2 more days I'll have to wash out the phenibut from my system and see how stable the kanna alone can hold me. But whatever the case I'm a lot more optimistic today, and I kinda have Quasistoned to thank for that. He prob has no idea why because he thinks I did him a favor, but it wound up helping me a ton lastnight. So Quasi if you check this thread out at all buddy thanks!!

 

[Help me please]

^ Good luck Bo. You got the Clonidine pills? The doctor said the patch is better (his opinion so take it for what it's worth) because you get a constant stream of meds once they start to kick in after a few days. When the patch comes off and a new one is put on there is no waiting period for it to kick in. Once the final patch is removed and not replaced the meds work an additional 8 hours then nothing.

It also works for insomnia but that may include the pills too. I'm sticking with the patch. I just changed my first one now. I have to use the overlay thing and then surgical tape to keep it on for 7 days but it's cool.

 

[Bojangles69]

Well just some very random bouts of anxiety today that came and went in moments. I admit I got nervous about the drop and rather than go from 15 mg to 7.5 mg at 4 pm, I got the pill cutter out and chopped off a 1/4 so I took 11.25 mg instead. I think if all goes well I will then drop to 7.5 mg on Saturday.

I have a family member coming on Sunday to stay hopefully a week or more which will be of great comfort to me. I need to quit focusing on tapering 24/7. I think I must dream about it too. I know that once I get a pattern figured out I will be fine again. Didn't Bo first come out here seeking a pattern too? It must be a flight or fight response if I am not the only one who did.

Ham keeps telling me it won't be near as bad this time as that first WD and I DO believe him. Once again for anyone who does not know me yet...I am a chicken shit I am a worrier too.

Awesome thats great! Do not ever feel bad at all about taking 11.25mg, you are doing it EXACTLY the way you should be, and thats listening to your body instead of focusing on the taper 24/7.
I'm not sure though exactly what you meant by "pattern", if you mean like a routine of doing stuff than yeh I know exactly what you mean. But the flight or fight response kinda confused me, I'm just not remembering the relation to seeking a "pattern". Maybe you could refresh my memory? lol, sorry =]

It sounds helpme like you are well on your way now. Not just with the taper but the fact that you will actually succeed at it. You've already taking some pretty impressive drops, and although you're most likely not 100% comfortable, you're also not complaining like its the end of the world. If it has thrown you for a loop yet, I just don't see it happening at all. I still do get worried though about that last day however, because thats when you get to see truely how differently peoples bodies react.

Some people stop and are fine. Some people get minor anxiety and fatigue, some people like me get slammed with a pretty nasty case of insomnia and rls. But because you're not a drug addict, and because you've basically controlled your use of opiates 100%, THAT is gonna be the one thing that really comes back to help you out now.
All those days where us drug addicts say "just one more dose isn't gonna hurt", you never had to really deal with that. So this whole process should be somewhat stable for you, and I genuinely believe its only gonna get easier from this point on. Once you get your feet wet with like a week or 2 of tapering, the rest of the taper just kinda falls into place like a puzzle. Lets just hope you can sleep once its all out of your system cause thats my new number 1 fear towards opiates.
Give me all the pain you want, all the chills and hotflashes you want, but when night after night after night there is no sleep to be had, thats the only thing that was strong enough to break me down. But I think that harsh insomnia only follows those more irresponsibly habits like I had.

Good to see everyone hanging in there.

 

[Help me please]

Can you bump your old thread. I can't find it and I think it was there that you mentioned finding a pattern in the WD. It was like when the RLS would start and end and when the insomnia would too, etc.

 

[Bojangles69]

^ Good luck Bo. You got the Clonidine pills? The doctor said the patch is better (his opinion so take it for what it's worth) because you get a constant stream of meds once they start to kick in after a few days. When the patch comes off and a new one is put on there is no waiting period for it to kick in. Once the final patch is removed and not replaced the meds work an additional 8 hours then nothing.

It also works for insomnia but that may include the pills too. I'm sticking with the patch. I just changed my first one now. I have to use the overlay thing and then surgical tape to keep it on for 7 days but it's cool.

Ok I think I finally see where he is coming from, using the patch creates an extended release version of the clonidine basically, which makes it much more stable in your blood. So he is absolutely on the money with his opinion.

I got the pills for various reasons, one was the intensity of the RLS at the time I ordered them, and another was the fact that in detox I didn't see a single person prescribed clonidine patches. We all talked about all the meds we were on and everyone was taking the pills usually for 7-10 days untill they were tapered off them. It was pretty much standard protocol for the specific detox I was at.
So when I intially heard about the patch I thought "wtf", and then I researched it and saw people who were put on the patch the first few days of detox and complained it didn't do anything at all for them (which made me assume they were worthless at first untill I realized that was just the doctors fault as they should have been on the pills that early in wd like you had said). So I think it really comes down to how much the doctor knows what they are doing, and the specific needs of the patient. But at this point absolutely I would prefer the patch, just that theres not really anything I can do about it cause I was too skeptical about their effectiveness weeks ago. But Im sure once you get past a certain point your blood pressure doesn't bounce up and down like it does on the pills, and because of that I'd say its smart that you're on the patch... which contradicts what I've said once before about them.

I'm really not even thinking I'm gonna need a whole pill, I can prob get by fine on 50mcgs a day or .5mg, but I just hope they get here soon so I can figure out what kind of shape my body is in right now. All and all I've been waiting this long, so I'm sure I can wait a couple more days for the meds. I am however running out of suboxone though and can't maintain on it much longer than another week, so if something happens to those pills before they get here I'll be in a weird situation. But I'm just keeping my fingers crossed and putting some faith in GOD for once.

I have to say one more thing about GOD.
I use to pray every night before I went to bed and had stopped praying when I started using opiates again. I'd pretty much say a prayer for my family every night and my own health even though I'm not a religous person.
And I always kinda felt like I had turned my back on god by trading him basically for an opiate.
Well anyway last night I was laying in bed and the thought passed my mind to say a prayer. And I said one for my family, and than said "god, ALL I CARE about is that I can get some sleep w/out needing sub anymore, and while I'm on sub now, I'd really prefer not to sleep 14 hours every night because thats the same way I felt on pods.. and its making it hard to stay optimistic on this drug.... if theres ANYTHING you could do to help me I could never pay you back for all that you've done for me"
(something along those lines I said)

And the weirdest thing happened today. I woke up at 8am after only having 6 hours of sleep. Now that might seem expected because I've complained about insomnia, but even on low doses of sub I tend to sleep for 12-14 hours, so ever since being on sub my sleep basically flipped from 2-4 hours a night, to completely oversleeping (although theres def a little more to it than just what I wrote, like initially on the sub I was still having terrible insomnia).
And it has been so consistent recently the oversleeping, that it made me feel like I was getting high again. There was really not one single logical reason why my body was able to wake up at 8am on sub. Every single other morning I've been a zombie dragging my body halfway out of bed than jumping back under the covers to sleep more. But this morning I woke right up and hopped out of bed. I had also not even touched any Kanna or Phenibut cause it just came in the mail today.
But the whole day I've been thinking "wow, maybe I really should start praying again". Thats really the first time in my whole life I ever felt like one of my prayers was answered. Its prob just coincidence, but man did it really brighten my whole day today.

 

[Bojangles69]

Can you bump your old thread. I can't find it and I think it was there that you mentioned finding a pattern in the WD. It was like when the RLS would start and end and when the insomnia would too, etc.

Ok no that worked 100% I remember now perfectly.

I was talking about how you will start to notice real specific patterns in the phase of wd. Like for me I had NO RLS or insomnia at all till about week 8, or when I was basically close to jumping off.
And I noticed that hotflashes, chills, goosebumps, and the bug crawling feeling were worse from day 1, and slowly faded out completely till like week 4-5. I'd still get them after that point but they were more random, much less severe, and not consistent in any way.
So most of the begining stuff for the most part was obliterated about half way through the taper. There about about 2 weeks before the jump off where I don't remember really feeling any symptoms at all. And after that was when the insomnia/RLS began to show its face. I can't generalize that pattern to anyone elses withdrawals, but if you notice anything similar it would be really interesting.

I think one pattern you might notice after a bit more time is that your larger doses might take you to hour 10, and your smaller doses may only get you to hour 6. So you may definitely be more comfortable a week from now going for 10 hours on your morning doses (or which ever ones are bigger) and only going for like 6 hours on the smaller 7.5mg doses. It might seem like the lower you get the less the doses are holding you, but theres also a point where your tolerance drops and the doses DO begin to work better than they did before. But its just so relative to our biologies too.

What I will say though is noticing those patterns are exactly what allows you to tweak your taper so you can gain more comfort in the long run. So absolutely pay attention to them and use them to your advantage. Hopefully they can help push things along smoother like they did for me. But I definitely remember now what you're talking about.

 

[Help me please]

Cool. I am still sticking to every 8 hours until I am done with the 4 pm dose. At that point I will move the midnight dose to 8pm so that my two remaining doses are 8 hours apart.

It's 3.5 hours since my drop and I feel fine. I have been fine the last two drops as well. It seemed like it was after two consecutive full doses that I became symptomatic. See what I mean about finding that pattern? If it turns out that is it for me and I will have a night of sweating (who the hell cares about that?) and a day of anxiety BUT knowing that the next day I will be fine again...That's what I am looking for.

If it isn't to be found then so be it! One day at a time. Actually I guess I have to live in the moment.

 

[mr50/50]

I'm glad everyone seems to be doing well. I'm on day 6 clean. My mindset is much better after 6 days, at the beginning I feared I would be screwed for weeks.

Keep your heads up, everyone. This does get SO much better. Things are already more vivid than they've been in the almost year that I've been under the influence of opiates. That alone has made the hell worthwhile.

I might get run off for this, but I feel like we get off pretty easy. Imagine if withdrawal symptoms lasted the equivalent time period of your habit? 1 year of withdrawals for 1 year of abuse.... Things could be much worse.

Hope everyone's recovery and tapering continue to go as planned. We show a strength and resolve that 99% of people can't even comprehend. What sucks is that instead of being recognized for our strength and self control, we're condemned for our pasts. That's what I love about BL. There's no condemnation or judgment here. You guys are great.

 

[Help me please]

^ Mr 50/50 glad tyou are doing well. I had a perfectly normal day today with no symptoms at all. I am beyond thrilled.

Don't think twice about what others think of you! They could be in your shoes with a blink of an eye. Anyone that needs to pass judgement isn't worth talking to.