such timing.....

[drea]

such a touch,
a cool handprint, left on my body
chilling my skin, freezing my thoughts
im far too young to be so dissolusioned
im far too confused to find my own head
what a lesson to learn
to lose
to gain
and in the end, its the emptiness that takes over
when you cant remember the good times
when the kisses of summer leave a hot spot on your brain
when the lust of spring leaves a scar, not a bloom
my conception of reality, a jilted thing.
what to beleive, who is real
everything ive known and loved
a temporary joy, a permanent disaster
from lover to whore
from friend to chore
i cant take the transition
....you always reappear
when a new proposition is laying by my side
the sweet smell of your inebriated mind,
your thoughts lubricated and fabricated by such liquid strength and intent
filters through the airwaves,
taunting me,
asking me,
to keep you company
to hold you again
one brief moment....to ruin it all again
so you can leave me at the starting line
youre so used to me caving in..
youre so used to me catering to your every whim
because what i hold is true love...
but my feet no longer rest on a path to eternal joy, encased in a power brought forth by you
i can merely swing atop this crazed feeling
and i cant trust my own mind
because you cant be straightforward
...we both lost,
and everytime i build this strength back, i let a new heart in, contemplating the thoughts of beginning anew...
its like you sense it...
and come to chase it away
i hate you
i love you
just go away...
tell me you hate me...
tell me im your whore
tell me im a piece of worthless trash
infuse me with such hatred for you
so that i can forget the good times
and find security in such an easy pain to deal with
i can fight back with swords and knives,
pierce your ego and knock you down
...you just couldnt make it that easy, could you?
i crave the solid, i crave the joy
i crave the things you gave and took
its the simple things...
the simple things...
the simple things you make so hard...
------------------
::heaven holds a sense of wonder/and i wanted to believe/that id get caught up when the rage in me subsides::

 

[cand-E bamber]

muy bien!! heheh... this hit close to home. i was in those exact same shoes not to long ago. i could relate to it all, in a way it gave me a lil more closure.. so thank you.
------------------
Isn't it enough to see that a garden is beautiful without having to believe that there are fairies at the bottom of it too? - Douglas Adams

 

[Dutchram]

Why give an answer?
When the best answer is left unsaid?
The uncertainty of the future and what may come?
To the lives of two that once were one?
To infuse hate is only to refuse love?
And sometimes the best way to end something is not to ingratiate, the other party
with words of hate or detest
but ignoring them seems to work best.
--------------------------------------------
btw, i just broke up with my ex who wont leave me alone so ignorance is the best method ive worked out so far

 

[ice-9]

.

 

[drea]

resque...i am so flattered

i cant beleive you have a whole folder for them...thats so cool! ( i dont even have copies of them, i usually just type them and forget about em)
again, thank you so much

-drea