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Still trying...

Robi said:
man cave cmt GIF by I Love Kellie Pickler
having a
man cave superman GIF by Warner Archive
is essential for some. im just going to go to my kitchen, barefoot where i belong
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Get in your bitch cave lady!
 
n3ophy7e said:
Happiness is purely, 100% subjective. It is completely up to you to set the parameters of what happiness could be, then of course it is up to you to do what you need to do to achieve it. This is very freeing when you realise it, because it means that you possess the power to be happy if you want to be, regardless of your circumstances.

So the question is not will you ever be happy, it is do you WANT to be happy.
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Sorry but that's deluded magical thinking. You reckon, to take an extreme example, some bloke who's homeless, alone, disabled and starving can just 'decide' to be happy about the grade A shit show that their life is? Someone who just lost everyone they loved in a disastrous accident can just smile and carry on?!

Yeah I guess if you set your sights so low that just being alive and breathing is good enough for 'happiness', then maybe. But things around us affect us, things we do not control affect us, REALITIES WE CANNOT CHANGE affect us. And people have different needs. Someone who spends most of his life sedentary might cope with ending up in a wheelchair. Someone whose chief joy in life is being physically active won't.
 
The UltimateFixx said:
Sorry but that's deluded magical thinking. You reckon, to take an extreme example, some bloke who's homeless, alone, disabled and starving can just 'decide' to be happy about the grade A shit show that their life is? Someone who just lost everyone they loved in a disastrous accident can just smile and carry on?!

Yeah I guess if you set your sights so low that just being alive and breathing is good enough for 'happiness', then maybe. But things around us affect us, things we do not control affect us, REALITIES WE CANNOT CHANGE affect us. And people have different needs. Someone who spends most of his life sedentary might cope with ending up in a wheelchair. Someone whose chief joy in life is being physically active won't.
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Ahhh damn it, I had a feeling you'd try to pick it apart like that :)

I stand by what I said though. In my opinion our emotions are a choice. It's not as simple as flicking a switch in your brain and just being happy, THAT is deluded magical thinking. I'm talking about making a conscious decision to work towards being happy. What is happy? That is up to the individual to decide. Is it simply a shelter from the rain and 1 meal a day, basic survival needs met, then anything else is a bonus? For some people in the world yes, that is all they need to keep them satisfied. For most people the bar is set a little higher, we want our survival needs comfortably met, food, shelter, love, warmth etc, and we also want some kind of daily purpose to keep us happy like a job that we enjoy or a good family life. And for some people they choose to set their standards even higher still and aren't happy until they are a multi-millionaire or some shit I dunno.

Being happy comes easier to some people than others, and it takes practice. Some people might need therapy, meditation, vipassana retreats, ayahuasca ceremonies, shit like that to learn it. It's about being grateful for the things you have and the things you get to experience, instead of mourning the things you don't have. People can have literally nothing, yet still be happy. Conversely, some people have everything, money, cars, clothes, hot groupies, everything you could possibly imagine, yet still be fucking miserable. But It's ALL a choice.

I will add a disclaimer for people with mental illnesses or neurological conditions, obviously some people with neurochemical imbalances or brain injury can't be feel certain emotions and/or can't control their emotions. I would think that goes without saying but I have a feeling you're gonna pick this apart too ;) Which is okay, makes no difference to me! :)
 
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n3ophy7e said:
Ahhh damn it, I had a feeling you'd try to pick it apart like that :)

I stand by what I said though. In my opinion our emotions are a choice. It's not as simple as flicking a switch in your brain and just being happy, THAT is deluded magical thinking. I'm talking about making a conscious decision to work towards being happy. What is happy? That is up to the individual to decide. Is it simply a shelter from the rain and 1 meal a day, basic survival needs met, then anything else is a bonus? For some people in the world yes, that is all they need to keep them satisfied. For most people the bar is set a little higher, we want our survival needs comfortably met, food, shelter, love, warmth etc, and we also want some kind of daily purpose to keep us happy like a job that we enjoy or a good family life. And for some people they choose to set their standards even higher still and aren't happy until they are a multi-millionaire or some shit I dunno.

Being happy comes easier to some people than others, and it takes practice. Some people might need therapy, meditation, vipassana retreats, ayahuasca ceremonies, shit like that to learn it. It's about being grateful for the things you have and the things you get to experience, instead of mourning the things you don't have. People can have literally nothing, yet still be happy. Conversely, some people have everything, money, cars, clothes, everything you imagine, yet still be fucking miserable. It's ALL a choice.

I will add a disclaimer for people with mental illnesses or neurological conditions, obviously some people with neurochemical imbalances or brain injury can't be feel certain emotions. I would think that goes without saying but I have a feeling you're gonna pick this apart too ;) Which is okay, makes no difference to me! :)
Click to expand...
Very well said and so true. We really are the master of our happiness or lack thereof. You are a very wise and grateful woman.
 
The UltimateFixx said:
Sorry but that's deluded magical thinking. You reckon, to take an extreme example, some bloke who's homeless, alone, disabled and starving can just 'decide' to be happy about the grade A shit show that their life is? Someone who just lost everyone they loved in a disastrous accident can just smile and carry on?!

Yeah I guess if you set your sights so low that just being alive and breathing is good enough for 'happiness', then maybe. But things around us affect us, things we do not control affect us, REALITIES WE CANNOT CHANGE affect us. And people have different needs. Someone who spends most of his life sedentary might cope with ending up in a wheelchair. Someone whose chief joy in life is being physically active won't.
Click to expand...
Sometimes just being able to breath is all we have. You can look at that in the worst possible way, or not. The only thing you can control is yourself. Xzy situation can happen but only you can control how you respond to it. That gives you power, even in the worst of situations. It is a choice. The sky can be blue, or it can be filled with thunder, that is what you chose.
 
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