still nervous taking drug tests.

[Ds]

I hate this shit, I was drug tested about an hour ago or so, and it was like I couldn't pee. my dick went litterly inside me. I started to shake, he(staff) was watching me. Talking to me. So here I stand..
3 minutes later I still havn't pissed. standing there with my thing in the cup. I had to pee, but nothing was wanting to come out.
finally I piss, and my piss was orangish.(yeah havnt been drinking a lot of water).

so it was a damn good test imo, heres the kicker. I had a "faint" line for THC. which I havn't smoked pot since summer of 2010. I have no fucking idea. I passed regardless, but he threw that shit out there like "is there anything you want to talk about"?

i'm like yeah, you got pretty eyes.

anyways, does anyone go through the same shit when you have to pee in a cup?

or is it just me.

 

[theartofwar]

Ironic, I just had this happen two days ago bro. I can piss like seabiscuit but the minute i got someone watching me I am the same way, my dick turns into a scared turtled and I cannot for the life of me get a drop. I end up just sitting there day dreaming with my cock out lol. Wicked frustrating.

 

[Owl Eyed]

my p.o doesn't administer a piss test. he gives me a saliva test.

i still get the butterflies . i get sweaty and stuff.

 

[OpiYum]

is it different for girls bc we get to sit down and not be fully exposed? bc i can pee easily in front of the women who have administered drug tests.

Its great bc w a vagina I can always say i have my period and have a tampon so I fumble with my vaginal area so I can unleash my reservoir of fake urine.

-----
Why dont u practice peeing in front of a friend? like a role play. I am being totally serious. Remember-- practice makes perfect.

And make sure to practice in different environments so that your new learned behavior can be generalized, and not situated to that one context.

And are there any legal substances or any behaviors or thoughts that reduce your anxiety? Like chamomile tea, inhaling a certain essential oil (lavender), kava kava, deep breaths, focusing your eyes somewhere and imaging that you are home by urself. I'm just brainstorming.

Also, at what point does the anxiety set in? Before going ino the building or before meeting your po. Or are you cool just until u enter the bathroom? Or does the po speak or perhaps when he steps too close to u and that triggers it? if you visualize the scenario in your mind with the successful performance you desire many times, then perhaps that can also serve to mitigate your anxiety.

 

[Cyc]

I don't pee in a cup for anyone.

 

[halfoz]

i had this happen to me about a month ago. was sheer agony. had to go produce a sample for a UA, and I guess I was super dehydrated, cause it then took 4 frickin hours(!) of frustrated waiting and wishing and being the most self conscious person on the planet, plus 7 big cups of water and 2 big cups of coffee.

miserable.

cyc, you'd pee into a cup if you lived in my state. its mandatory for all patients in a practice that dispenses opiates - even if you're not taking any.

 

[Zerrr]

I'm glad you posted this. I have to take ua's every once in a while and everytime I freeze up-can't go. It doesn't matter how much water I drink either.
Also, it seems like the more nervous I am, the smaller my stuff gets, which makes it even more humiliating. Ha, my p.o probably thinks I was born with 3 nuts.


*Oh and they always think the reason I can't go is because I am dirty, but I have yet to fail a test.

peace

 

[kanyeknievel]

Hahah don't even get me start on that stuff. about a year ago when I was arrested for possesion I had to go to a substance abuse program which was 3 months three times a week. and there was other kids in the group and it was just random who pisseed on that day. I have to be the shyest pisser in the world. One time I had to stay after for like 2 hours bcuz everytime i tried i couldnt do it. i was always the last person to piss and i had to piss really bad, but i just couldnt. Just about every time i went I pissed in like dribbles and i just did it until i reached the MINIMUM amount i needed.
I dont see why Im such a shy peer, i have a nice sized penis ( i know people are shy pees cuz of that), i cant pee in stalls with others there, i didnt have anything to hide, etc. Sucked but it was a big laugh when it was all over hahah

 

[Bojangles69]

I don't pee in a cup for anyone.

Thats real smart. Great way to get thrown in jail for refusing a urine if you're on parole or probation.


To the OP. I had to piss in a cup for 3.5 years while I was on parole. And EVERY single week I did it, I hate it. But the last 2 years I had to report less often (once a month) so it did get a bit better.

Anyways, I always had to piss with a line of excons standing behind me and a cop staring directly at my junk, and if you couldn't go you made them very impatient as they would all pound water prior just to piss and everyone was holding their dicks in line waiting for the next guy to piss. I would down about a gallon of lukewarm water, just to find that if you are pee shy you are pee shy and downing no amount of water tends to help that much. Although its always better than not downing water.

Let me explain though. My attitude changed and I got to the point where if I couldn't piss, I'd tell my PO "I can't pee" and they're merely make me wait untill I could. But you need to rid that immense pressure of needing to go when they say so because it spiraled out of control for me untill one day I just said fvck it I'm peeing when I'm ready. You obviously can't just not pee unless jail is your thing, but try to remove some pressure by just admitting to the PO if you're not ready to go. Its better to say "I'm not ready yet" then to force yourself when you're genuinely not ready and not be able to go as that makes everyone that much more impatient and tends to make PO's more suspect I find.

At any rate I found 20mg of inderal beforewards really helps me a lot. And for real extreme situations soma will take away your pee shyness 100%. This is because its caused by tense muscles, and too much soma can cause a person to outright piss their pants. It helps more than anything. Just don't take too much and go in to the place stumbling.
But if you can find soma, its definitely the cure for peeshy people imo. Any decent muscle relaxer will help really. And noone tests for that shit so you will be cool.

 

[Tommyboy]

I had the same problem OP, and was tested weekly for almost 2 years. I offered to pay for the cheek swab tests, but they wouldn't do it for some reason.

What helped for me was, I would start to go in the stall, and "establish a flow," then yell to them that I was ready, run over to the urinal, and piss in the cup there. It didn't work every time, but most of the time it did.