That-Strange-Guy
Bluelighter
I was going to hold off to write this as its a big subject regarding the novel I have been trying to write since 2006.
As far back as I can remember, around the time I learned to speak I have had a very creative and active mind which drifted to strange depths of the unknown. I had several imaginary friends whom I spent my time with, my mother always told me they were not real but I remember vividly seeing them and communicating with them both telepathically and verbally. This worried my mother as she would find me having intelligent conversations to myself about various topics. She insisted that it was something I would grow out of, and eventually I gave in and ignored them around the age of 4.
By the age of 6 I found myself sitting in the grass and drawing landscapes that I have never seen before, visions that came to me in dreams so I wouldn't forget them. Also when I took time to absorb the beauty of the planet around me something would happen, almost like a psychedelic trip, I would feel a surge of euphoria as the trees transformed into blurrs of dancing pixels, colors became more vibrant and my vision and hearing would sharpen. To me this was normal and it was something I enjoyed doing, so I did it often.
By the age of 10 I was having lucid dreanms almost every night, and became conscious of a life beyond being awake. A place where I could be free from my ego and bask in my own imagination. Eventually this became so fluent that I would just daydream for hours, zone out until I was disturbed from my thoughts and construct my own world, a place where I found beauty, comfort, and love. This place seemed far more real than reality as it touched my emotions much deeper. I was tied to it, it was just as much a part of me as my own skin.
By the age of 12 I started experimenting with acid and marijuana, I was always taught drugs were bad but I found myself surrounded by my childhood experiences, patterns, emotions, thoughts, memories, colors, things that I have not been in touch with for years. This fascinated me more than anything else in the world, I wanted to know what my connection was to this force.
I breezed through school and never did homework, I had all A's and B's but I found it very difficult not to slip into a daydream about these experiences. So I began experimenting further with psychedelics and meditation. And to my luck I had much success.
After every heavy psychedelic experience I found myself exploring deeper into my mind, and farther from my body, I became obsessed, almost as if to detach from my body forever and go to where I really considered home.
Soon these experiences would strike randomly, I could be in the middle of a conversation and the world around me would warp and go vibrant, but yet it felt so comfortable and enjoyable. I have now learned to control these visuals at will, although they are not as potent as taking a substance for example.
Later in life while studying Buddhism I fell in love with a wiccan who opened my eyes to the occult arts and astral projection. I made a very strong connection through her teachings and was even able to communicate with "spirits" as they call them. Even after our breakup I practiced some mantras, and astral projection, and even the Ouija boards.
Every new experience I endured felt like it came from the same energy, the same source, trying to tell me something or guide me in a direction but I was disappointed as I was too blind or dumb to understand the complexity of it.
Then I tried DMT.... This changed everything for me, all of my experiences, all of my teachings, the energy, the visions, the imaginary friends, they were all here in a beautiful world much like the one I tried to construct in my own head to drown out reality. But the amazing thing was that I had also seen religious symbols, the gates of heaven, entities that resembled angels, pyramids, humonoids with animal heads (like the egyptian gods). The clues were everywhere that this world was connected to ours through a faint connection.
After trying ayahuasca with my cousin and her mother who is a shaman healer, I had to do more research... Thankfully bluelight lead me onto DMT the spirit molecule and Dr.Rick Strassman. I reached out and made contact with Strassman, watched his documentary, and read his books. We had several indepth conversations about spirituality and experiences, and he filled my head with a broader understanding.
After all of this I furiously began writing my own experiences, everything I could recall, about my dreams, my trips, my visions, my thoughts and have been trying to somehow organize these thousands of pages (jot notes) into a novel to enlighten those who have not been fortunate enough to enjoy this. I strongly believe that all of the things I have talked about are all related under one force, or perhaps another world we are tied to.
My own thoughts are that when we sleep we actually awaken, and in this world you know everything, you are relieved from stress, and limitations of the waken life. But our brain filters these experiences and makes us forget them as we awaken to prevent us from letting our "host" (body) go to waste, for some reason in our waken life we need to grow and learn and repopulate and we only know why when we sleep, or when we die. But then your energy will be transferred to a new host as energy is eternal and everything is one.
I could elaborate much more on this topic but I am going camping and rushing to do some last minute packing. I will check this when I get back home. I hope I have entertained you with some of my life story. And don't be shy to honestly reply.
As far back as I can remember, around the time I learned to speak I have had a very creative and active mind which drifted to strange depths of the unknown. I had several imaginary friends whom I spent my time with, my mother always told me they were not real but I remember vividly seeing them and communicating with them both telepathically and verbally. This worried my mother as she would find me having intelligent conversations to myself about various topics. She insisted that it was something I would grow out of, and eventually I gave in and ignored them around the age of 4.
By the age of 6 I found myself sitting in the grass and drawing landscapes that I have never seen before, visions that came to me in dreams so I wouldn't forget them. Also when I took time to absorb the beauty of the planet around me something would happen, almost like a psychedelic trip, I would feel a surge of euphoria as the trees transformed into blurrs of dancing pixels, colors became more vibrant and my vision and hearing would sharpen. To me this was normal and it was something I enjoyed doing, so I did it often.
By the age of 10 I was having lucid dreanms almost every night, and became conscious of a life beyond being awake. A place where I could be free from my ego and bask in my own imagination. Eventually this became so fluent that I would just daydream for hours, zone out until I was disturbed from my thoughts and construct my own world, a place where I found beauty, comfort, and love. This place seemed far more real than reality as it touched my emotions much deeper. I was tied to it, it was just as much a part of me as my own skin.
By the age of 12 I started experimenting with acid and marijuana, I was always taught drugs were bad but I found myself surrounded by my childhood experiences, patterns, emotions, thoughts, memories, colors, things that I have not been in touch with for years. This fascinated me more than anything else in the world, I wanted to know what my connection was to this force.
I breezed through school and never did homework, I had all A's and B's but I found it very difficult not to slip into a daydream about these experiences. So I began experimenting further with psychedelics and meditation. And to my luck I had much success.
After every heavy psychedelic experience I found myself exploring deeper into my mind, and farther from my body, I became obsessed, almost as if to detach from my body forever and go to where I really considered home.
Soon these experiences would strike randomly, I could be in the middle of a conversation and the world around me would warp and go vibrant, but yet it felt so comfortable and enjoyable. I have now learned to control these visuals at will, although they are not as potent as taking a substance for example.
Later in life while studying Buddhism I fell in love with a wiccan who opened my eyes to the occult arts and astral projection. I made a very strong connection through her teachings and was even able to communicate with "spirits" as they call them. Even after our breakup I practiced some mantras, and astral projection, and even the Ouija boards.
Every new experience I endured felt like it came from the same energy, the same source, trying to tell me something or guide me in a direction but I was disappointed as I was too blind or dumb to understand the complexity of it.
Then I tried DMT.... This changed everything for me, all of my experiences, all of my teachings, the energy, the visions, the imaginary friends, they were all here in a beautiful world much like the one I tried to construct in my own head to drown out reality. But the amazing thing was that I had also seen religious symbols, the gates of heaven, entities that resembled angels, pyramids, humonoids with animal heads (like the egyptian gods). The clues were everywhere that this world was connected to ours through a faint connection.
After trying ayahuasca with my cousin and her mother who is a shaman healer, I had to do more research... Thankfully bluelight lead me onto DMT the spirit molecule and Dr.Rick Strassman. I reached out and made contact with Strassman, watched his documentary, and read his books. We had several indepth conversations about spirituality and experiences, and he filled my head with a broader understanding.
After all of this I furiously began writing my own experiences, everything I could recall, about my dreams, my trips, my visions, my thoughts and have been trying to somehow organize these thousands of pages (jot notes) into a novel to enlighten those who have not been fortunate enough to enjoy this. I strongly believe that all of the things I have talked about are all related under one force, or perhaps another world we are tied to.
My own thoughts are that when we sleep we actually awaken, and in this world you know everything, you are relieved from stress, and limitations of the waken life. But our brain filters these experiences and makes us forget them as we awaken to prevent us from letting our "host" (body) go to waste, for some reason in our waken life we need to grow and learn and repopulate and we only know why when we sleep, or when we die. But then your energy will be transferred to a new host as energy is eternal and everything is one.
I could elaborate much more on this topic but I am going camping and rushing to do some last minute packing. I will check this when I get back home. I hope I have entertained you with some of my life story. And don't be shy to honestly reply.
Last edited:
