I'm now convinced I was experiencing the begging of serotonin syndrome due to several symptoms I was having that I could not attribute to schizophrenia. Racing heart, unexplainable rushes of body sensations/ mild euphoria, agitation, confusion, increased sweating and of course hallucinations. At the time, I thought it was just a panic attack due to being worried about a relapse in schizophrenia.
It's all starting to make sense now.
I was so worried and had convinced myself it was simply a relapse in schizophrenia and could not be anything else.
I was going step by step trying to find the cause. Kratom? can't be... Kava? can't be... Ashwagandha?.... I thought no, I've been taking it every day for weeks... can't be.... but sure enough, it was. I did not do enough research, trusted some anecdotal internet shit, but was dead wrong.
Sometimes I can't see the obvious right in front of me and focus on something else. This could have been easily avoided had I simply stopped taking that supplement.
Snap on that my friend, so glad you are seeing light and clarity returning.
That intense hadship when we are forced tightly down the line can have it's blessings too. WHEN it eases up.
I hope you will appreciate feeling calmer and seeing clearer again.
I have inflicted so much harm on myself, trying supplements, drugs, foods last 17 years in desperate bid to recover, comfort, any avenue.
Recently, Sea Moss! Smells heavenly. On paper great stuff.
For my body, destruction.
But it's arrival overlapped with some astonishing personal healing stuff going on.
Bottom line, 12 days thinking drinking sea moss was good for me, put me into one very sorry condition. Total sabotage of internal function.
Kratom does the same to me, most things do so I do walk a tight rope.
But now and then I get brave (or stupid, prob the latter lol) and go trapezing off at angles, as walking that tight line, looking down, L, R, straight ahead the only narrow way to go..
Feeling trapped. I hate that, so I try to hack the situation. Deny the reality, find another way.
A normal body, literally no sweat. Any which way to go. But it's true catch 22. No figure of speech, again these phrases genuinely describe phenomena.
It really is better for me to stay in the frying pan, than jump into the flames. It sounds dramatic but is no exaggeration.
So I'm not jumping out again. I hurt myself this time. Aggravated internal and external haemorrhoids to indescribable burning fire and so inflamed, tonne of digestive blockage and largely related to ongoing herxeimer hence, need access and exit regularly to avoid over toxicity, like rats trying to dig through no gap, sick to hell needing evacuation, sick to hell from fiery pain, no sleep, only time, pain and pain to escape it.
I done it already, lots times last year this specific condition, and all others along the road.
But out of everything I have ever known, I haven't known hardship, pain and horror like that.
Acupuncture was vital, the only treatment I could access. I had to survive that.
Better! Like, 99% better. And still 89% not great, but those experiences show you things.
If I had simply not started drinking sea moss, coinciding with rapid intestinal healing and flushing, I would likely have avoided the situation.
