Should I open a way to my subconscious if I suffered from anxiety and depression?

[skeptictreehugger]

Hey. Would it be a good idea to have a peek at my subconscious? I suffered from severe depression and panic attacks, there was a biological as well as environmental basis for it. But I also had spiritual crisis, spiritual dreams in Sanskrit, etc. I overcame it with medication, time and finding a direction in life. I built a wall of science and rationalism to shelter myself from all that chaos denying its existence and value. But everytime I watch a movie called Caotica Ana, I have emotional breakdown and it is emotionally and physically extremely draining. I contacted a hypnotherapist. My mom is afraid I will have another episode of depression and anxiety. But I read a quote that I find true, that unexamined life is not worth living. And I think that such a reaction to the movie is a sign that I have unresolved issues. Maybe cause of my panic attacks. Because they appeared while falling asleep. So there is a no known trigger.

 

[herbavore]

I think that exploring the subconscious is productive but certainly you have some reasons to want to make sure that you will be fully supported while doing it. Perhaps it is not so much your subconscious as your emotions? I too have had to strengthen my own relationship with my rational self due to being overwhelmed by my emotions. We need both of those relationships to be strong in order to lead a balanced life. I believe that panic attacks are mostly a reaction to uncontrollable fear. Using the rational mind is very important when dealing with panic attacks. But allowing the emotional self the freedom of expression necessary to thrive is just as important even though that puts us directly in the path of chaos.

One thing I would suggest before hypnosis is reading or listening to podcasts that address fear. Fear is the single most potent trap we humans fall into. We lose all perspective, even physically as we revert back to the reptilian brain's flight or fight response. Learning to sit with fear as you experience it and to calmly tease it apart, strand by strand (it's usually a tangled mess having little to do with the present) diffuses the potency of the emotion and allows you to evaluate it rather than simply react to it. Pema Chodron is one author that helped me immensely when I was having PTSD panic attacks. It wasn't magic--they did not simply go away. But she gave me a language to use in my own mind that allowed me to let my rational mind and my emotional self work together to overcome what had been a lifelong habit for me: defaulting to worry and panic.

 

[skeptictreehugger]

I think that exploring the subconscious is productive but certainly you have some reasons to want to make sure that you will be fully supported while doing it. Perhaps it is not so much your subconscious as your emotions? I too have had to strengthen my own relationship with my rational self due to being overwhelmed by my emotions. We need both of those relationships to be strong in order to lead a balanced life. I believe that panic attacks are mostly a reaction to uncontrollable fear. Using the rational mind is very important when dealing with panic attacks. But allowing the emotional self the freedom of expression necessary to thrive is just as important even though that puts us directly in the path of chaos.

One thing I would suggest before hypnosis is reading or listening to podcasts that address fear. Fear is the single most potent trap we humans fall into. We lose all perspective, even physically as we revert back to the reptilian brain's flight or fight response. Learning to sit with fear as you experience it and to calmly tease it apart, strand by strand (it's usually a tangled mess having little to do with the present) diffuses the potency of the emotion and allows you to evaluate it rather than simply react to it. Pema Chodron is one author that helped me immensely when I was having PTSD panic attacks. It wasn't magic--they did not simply go away. But she gave me a language to use in my own mind that allowed me to let my rational mind and my emotional self work together to overcome what had been a lifelong habit for me: defaulting to worry and panic.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart. It is so important someone gave me a thoughtful answer and time. I have been thinking the same, I need to integrate my rational and emotional side, so that I am more whole. And not either heart or mind.

But you see, you had PTSD so I suppose you knew what was wrong, whereas I have no idea. That's why I want to explore my subconscious mind. Even my extremely professional and rational psychiatrist told me it is possible it is in my subconscious mind. It was too much at once, having spiritual crisis with spiritual dreams filled with symbolism, and not knowing what to do with my life career-wise and breaking up with someone I love with my whole being. Yes, those were factors, but I feel there is a part of puzzle missing. I just know. That movie always reminds me of it.

Mindfulness is amazing, but I couldn't control those panic attacks with it, they were to powerful and lasted for 9 hours...

I think that I should approach it gradually. Even Plato said we should let our eyes get used to light of knowledge, while walking out of the cave, otherwise we'd go blind. Which to me is a metaphor for losing your mind.

 

[herbavore]

Have you ruled out any physical problems? I'm wondering about those 9 hour panic attacks--that sounds really intense. Also, did you say they always happen when you are going to sleep or usually?

Yes, I like the metaphor about gradually getting used to the light--could apply to so much.

You definitely have a lot going on in your life with career transitions, a painful breakup etc but getting your heart and blood pressure checked out sounds like something to at least check off the list.