• LAVA Moderator: Shinji Ikari

Should I make my friends pay??

Friends get drunken and lose balance = accident. Chalk it up to experience and move the valuables when there's a party

Friends get drunk and break your couch while jumping on it = not accident. They should have to pay for it.

You see what I mean?
 
How about you meet in the middle?
Only make them pay for half the damage.
After all, you're all partly to blame.
OK! Classic post for this forum without providing any reasons behind what you think.

WHY do you think that?

I think the owner of the house is responsible solely because it was his decision to allow the guests in to his house inebriated. His guests become something like 'his children' at that point where when they fuck up its his responsibility (since its his house).

So why do you think everybody is responsible in this case? Give me a reasonnnnnnnnnnn instead of just asserting your view! :D
 
How about you meet in the middle?
Only make them pay for half the damage.
After all, you're all partly to blame.

I like this idea. You could also possibly let them know that you don't need the money all up front and they can just pay you when they can (within a reasonable time frame).
 
OK! Classic post for this forum without providing any reasons behind what you think.

WHY do you think that?

I think the owner of the house is responsible solely because it was his decision to allow the guests in to his house inebriated. His guests become something like 'his children' at that point where when they fuck up its his responsibility (since its his house).

So why do you think everybody is responsible in this case? Give me a reasonnnnnnnnnnn instead of just asserting your view! :D

All parties are adults in this situation. When someone is invited to someone's house they should be expected to act like adults and respect the host's property. It was an accident, but it's still something that could have been prevented.
 
This is a direct explanation to Alasdair's befuddlement at our response.
i'm not befuddled by your response - i just disagree with it. it's called a difference of opinion and it's a pretty straightforward concept.
maybe you should stop using your knee-jerk reactions to judge moral scenarios :\
maybe you should read the bit you deliberately chose to omit in your quote in order to make your point. i wrote "for what it's worth" because i recognise that it's a knee-jerk reaction. i've considered this for a little longer and my opinion hasn't really changed - i think that the two people who broke it should pay a third of the cost along with the party organiser who should pick up the other third. to me, that's taking responsibility for their actions.
Get a better reason, friend, otherwise people are never going to take you seriously in discussions like this.
friend? perhaps you should stop patronizing me if you want me to take you seriously in discussions like these. we're not friends because i don't even know you. perhaps you don't take me seriously? that's fine - i can certainly live with that. i'm not sure what makes you think you speak for everybody else...

alasdair
 
Gaian, are you one of the people who broke the antique?

I can't really think of any other reason you'd be acting like such a condescending ass about this.
 
You said the piece that was broken was not an antique and can be replaced....so I'm assuming if your friend does in fact fork over $900 there is another one exactly like it, and equally as valuable available for your immediate purchase?
 
^ i agree with your solution but i disagree with the full extent of your first paragraph.

while i believe that a host should take steps to protect their environment (which is why i feel the host here should pick up 1/3 of the cost of the broken item), i'm not comfortable with this idea that, simply because i open my door to some friends, they are somehow relieved of all responsibility for their actions.

alasdair
 
i wonder if opinions would change if it was a $900 tv that got knocked over and busted...

i have no idea how i'd handle the situation. if it's something really special, it totally sucks that it was broken and can't be repaired. but at the same time, it was an accident. ack. i guess i'd hope that my friend would get me something special (but something he/she could afford at the same time) to take its place. i try not to look at gifts in monetary figures, so that would be a good solution *for me.* probably not for others, though.

whatever the outcome, i'd try to resolve it soon and move past it, cuz i don't think an accident, even a drunken one, should stand in the way of friends.
 
No more parties ?????????
Is that any help ???????????

Have you considered going on 'Judge Judy???????????' 8)

Or giving up antiques ????? Or friends ?????????
8o

on the other hand.................you could ask them to pay the $900 but i don't think they will be "friends" anymore=D

from now on any time i break anything i am going to blame my friends and ask them to pay for it..................or else i will go to Judge Judy..................

...............just broke a nail..........i'm ringing my lawyer=D


Is it REALLY necessary to use that much punctuation?????????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Anyway, OP.

Yeah, I think it would be kinda ridiculous to ask them to reimburse you. That's A LOT of money and I kinda agree with a poster up thread that it's not a good idea to mix drunk/high people and expensive and/or irreplaceable objects and while I wouldn't say you asked for it, I guess you have to take it as a lesson learned.

If your friends were house sitting and threw a party where some drunk person broke it, then ya, I think I would ask them, but you were there and could have forseen bad things happening when people get that intoxicated.

Maybe you could go about it by telling them "oh, I know you said you would pay for it, but I talked to my mom and it was $900! I know you don't have that kind of money." That way they will know how much it cost and a) perhaps be more careful in the future and b) offer to pay something to help you out.
 
i wonder if opinions would change if it was a $900 tv that got knocked over and busted...

that's a good point vibby and maybe a question everyone should ask themselves before coming to a conclusion.
 
I had a situation occur last night, and I need some advice on how to handle it.

My bf and I had a "post Mardi Gras" party at our apartment.

...

Any advice??

Yeah, don't invite people over your house to get drunk anymore before you drunk-proof it. Lack of planning makes you culpable in this situation.
 
OK! Classic post for this forum without providing any reasons behind what you think.

WHY do you think that?

I think the owner of the house is responsible solely because it was his decision to allow the guests in to his house inebriated. His guests become something like 'his children' at that point where when they fuck up its his responsibility (since its his house).

So why do you think everybody is responsible in this case? Give me a reasonnnnnnnnnnn instead of just asserting your view! :D

Ok, I'll explain it for you.
We have 2 debatable points here.
Number 1: If it wasn't for the person knocking it over then it wouldn't of happened.
Number 2: If it wasn't for the OP leaving it out then it wouldn't of happened either.
Both are very true, very valid points and both points can be argued till the cows come home.
Sooooo...... If they all take the blame and meet in the middle you can't get much fairer than that. :D
 
number 3: if it wasn't for the op's parents giving birth to him this would never have happened

conclusion: the op's parents deserve to lose their antique

ridiculous? sure :)

for me, refusal to accept responsibility for one's actions is a big part of what's wrong with the world. if those guys feel they're relieved of 100% of their personal responsibility simply because they walked through their friend's front door, that's up to them. if so, i think the op could use some better friends...

alasdair
 
for the record, i agree with alasdair. and if i broke something, whether it's a glass thingy, or a tv, or a window, i'd want to replace it with something of equal value, if at all possible. i just don't think i'd be good at asking someone else to do the same, and would try not to let that affect the friendship. if that makes sense.
 
I think inviting guests to a home or place of business with the express purpose of getting intoxicated absolves the guests of any responsibility to pay for the costs of accidents incurred over there.

If you expect people under the influence of CNS depressants to be responsible, you're being naive. To purposefully bring together a group of people to imbibe alcohol, you have to expect things to get rowdy and dangerous.
 
should friends be responsible for helping pay for damages if it happens in a hotel room?
 
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