statued
Greenlighter
Let me start off by saying I'm an addict in recovery but it's going very badly. I smoked weed for a very long time (daily for about 8 years) I feel like I can't function without either smoking weed or taking a stimulant and I prefer weed over stimulants any day of the week. This is a huge trigger for me and an excuse I use to go back to smoking weed. I have very real ADHD and I've had serious problems holding down a job when being sober. Usually what happens is managers and co workers get mad at me for not co operating with them and not concentrating, listening, and working fast enough. They seem to think it's because I have a bad attitude and I'm just ignoring them. It's gotten to the point of anxiety because I'm afraid co workers aren't going to like me and think I'm an idiot. I usually get an anxiety attack when I start a new job and just walk out in the middle of my shift without even telling anyone...
I'm going to see a psychiatrist and be totally honest with him. I'm going to tell him I'm an addict and my drug of choice is marijuana and I often like to take pain killers and benzos. The thing is, I hate stimulants. I took vyvanse for 3 months and it ended up giving me panic attacks and just driving me crazy. I honestly do not like stimulants and I don't abuse them as much as other drugs. (I might abuse them a little bit, example: taking them every day even on my off days, but the doctor's instructions are once a day. like taking them to play video games. but I would never take 2 in one day)
I say that I don't abuse stimulants because I look at drugs I do abuse, like pain killers, which I would take about 30mg of hydrocodone in 24 hours when I didn't even need it. Another example is Xanax, 4mg in 24 hours when I don't even need it.
I just hate being sober. I always want one drug to get high on daily just to make me happy. I know that's wrong but it's like I don't care if it's wrong!
So ultimately what I'm asking is, does anyone have experience telling a doctor the truth about your drug addiction, yet still getting prescribed a stimulant for ADHD or a benzo for anxiety attacks?
I'm going to see a psychiatrist and be totally honest with him. I'm going to tell him I'm an addict and my drug of choice is marijuana and I often like to take pain killers and benzos. The thing is, I hate stimulants. I took vyvanse for 3 months and it ended up giving me panic attacks and just driving me crazy. I honestly do not like stimulants and I don't abuse them as much as other drugs. (I might abuse them a little bit, example: taking them every day even on my off days, but the doctor's instructions are once a day. like taking them to play video games. but I would never take 2 in one day)
I say that I don't abuse stimulants because I look at drugs I do abuse, like pain killers, which I would take about 30mg of hydrocodone in 24 hours when I didn't even need it. Another example is Xanax, 4mg in 24 hours when I don't even need it.
I just hate being sober. I always want one drug to get high on daily just to make me happy. I know that's wrong but it's like I don't care if it's wrong!
So ultimately what I'm asking is, does anyone have experience telling a doctor the truth about your drug addiction, yet still getting prescribed a stimulant for ADHD or a benzo for anxiety attacks?