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Sexless marriage

I

Illegitimate soul

Greenlighter
Joined
Apr 19, 2016
Messages
8
I'm feeling depressed kinda rejected, my wife never has any interest in having sex with me. I'm not a terrible person, I go to work and help out. She never even shows me affection .in the past I had addiction issues but I haven't used in about 2.5 years. I feel like the only reason she's with me is cause we have a kid together. It's only 12am and she can't bother to wake up for some sex time. In a way I feel like relapsing because at least I could forget about life for a min. I've told her my feeling and its always my fault cause of the things I have done in the past, even if she would just touch me but she never does.
 
I'm sorry to hear you're going through this.

Is she depressed? Does she have a poor self image? Does she have a low sex drive or zero sex drive? Does she have a medical issue or take medication? How old is she? Is she lesbian?

What happens when you try to initiate sex or kiss, or touch her?

DO NOT relapse just because she will not have sex with you. Have you tried talking to her about this?
 
Is it possible that she doesn't love you, is cheating, or just feels trapped with you because of the child and rather not be with you?
 
Well originally we had a good sex life but honestly it's like that old Sam kinason joke about needing a jackhammer to get a women off, that's what it's like, I'm a average size guy so idk it fucks with my head. I've been with women who are easy to please in bed and I miss that, cause now I feel like a looser. And I really love my wife which makes it worse, it would be a lot easier if I hated her. I don't think I'll relapse cause I don't have any connections anymore but the idea is in my head, I feel like it's pointless, I work my ass off and don't feel like it's worth it, I'm done venting about this just needed to get it off my chest. So thanks for listening .
 
My hubby and I don't have sex anymore either.
We have one kid together and she's 15 months. He doesn't even try to grab me. He says he only wants Sex on the weekend because he works all week and is too tired. Yet, he masturbates to porn every morning. ivw Been replaced by porn. I feel honey often and think about past lovers.
I have plenty sex toys but I want a warm body to keep me company between the sheets.
Ugh
 
I would say maybe every 90 days to me that is nothing !
I hate being roommates and the times we do have sex it feels awkward like he's a stranger. We've been married 12 years and dates four years before that.
Yep, 17 years...
Even when I was pregnant he hardly has sex with me. You better believe I used my vibrator. Pregnant women are horny.
Maybe be is bored of me.
Well, I want a sex partner and if this keeps up I'm not sure what will happen. And I'm not boring in bed either.
People say tell me it's not nice to keep bugging him about sex. Because it's a form of coercion.
Damm, I gotta bully my man into fucking me??? That's fucking sad!!! I want a open marriage then...I think he wants me for wifely duties --cooking cleaning , grocery shopping , raising his kid.
I'm a nanny.

I want dick and I wanna be NASTY with someone.
I'm not gonna wait forever.
 
Hm, well waking someone up for sex can be a bit difficult... if I'm sleeping, I certainly wouldn't want to be woken up for sex. Maybe try before you guys fall asleep? Maybe plan a special dinner with her, talk, be romantic, and see if that leads to sex?
 
Long term relationships are hard work. Its hard to keep the sex drive up for one person you see every day and have a mundane ordinary life with.

Routine is necessary especially when looking after a child and work stresses. Neither of you are the same lover you once were...freely available and into heaps of sex.

Sex takes less priority as life gets in the way unless you make an effort. Its pretty normal and does not make you a loser or her a lesbian (come on Priest, you know thats a silly suggestion).

Make some time for just you and her. Lots of couples plan date nights with a special dinner and a setting for intimacy. You should consider this especially if you are doing nothing but work and have a kid.

She could just be too damn tired for sex. Same goes for Hurhels husband. Wanking to porn takes less effort and can fit into his time frame than actual sex.
 
Generally in long term relationships, the sex gets less frequent. I mean, that "honeymoon" phase.... tons of sex. But even after a few years, it decreases. BUT it shouldn't decrease that much. Obviously having a child together is going to decrease sex. It has in almost all relationships that I've seen. But that is one of the things you give up when you decide to have a child.
 
Why don't you fully accept it ? You already seem to know the truth. You are together because of the kid :) If you feel bad about this, do something, if you are a loser you will stay and compromise, if you don't care you will stay and not compromise. Face the truth, it's ok , you didn't do anything wrong.
 
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