Spinal
Bluelighter
It was the day before my move so I figured it would be a good day to take some of the San Pedro goo I cooked up. I woke up and wondered what the day was going to be like. At about 4:00 I go ahead and drink the liquid of about three shot glasses worth and put on some music. Somewhere around 45 minutes into it I can feel an uncomfortable stimulation starting to build. Much like being unnerved after drinking too much coffee. So I go outside and smoke which makes me feel a little better as I ease into the change of state. I go back inside and wonder what to do with my day, my last day in this apartment and in this town as I know it.
I decide not to let today turn into one of those day of surfing the web and playing Joy Devision at top volume and make an effort to get out of the house. Thinking has now become automatic and it's hard not to go with the thoughts running through my head and make any effort into getting up and out of the house. So I decide to make a mix tape and see just how far I'm going to come up. About 30 minutes later I'm sitting back pumping Nine Inch Nails through my system as the walls began to gain a colorful hue to them I get a phone call from my friend Matt who was going to be shooting a punk rock video at a club on 16-mm. I'd pretty much determined that I would be able to navigate and properly converse to any I may run into and leave my apartment to go downtown.
Once outside I light up a smoke and feel the metallic tinge run up my spine that only mescaline can produce. Every color is vivid and motion seems washed as if I'm in a dream. On the way to the train I run one of the people who lives upstairs coming out of the KFC. We stop and talk for a bit and then he comments on my John Wayne Gacy shirt telling me about clown college here in S.F. and how much clowns scare him. I couldn't keep they smile off my face because it was so dam funny, but he was cool and I think half joking anyways. And I continue may walk to the train. Normally I wouldn't write about something this mundane, save for the fact that as I was walking up the street I find a sizable metal pot pipe with a ball of hash in it!!!!!! WofickingHo!!!!! Needless to say I smoked the hash while waiting for the train.
The train ride was classic. People drinking everywhere, odd conversation and that uneasy feeling I always get on the train, but with fractal imagery if I closed my eyes. Soon enough I was downtown with a full on buzz and lost trying to find the place. As luck would have it I struck up a conversation with a local and he pointed out to me that it was literally across the street. So I go in and say hello excited not about being in some music video for a band I've never even heard before, but that I was going to get to see a good friend do what he loves to do, make film.
I go downstairs and wait for them to set up as another band plays on the stage. It had been awhile since I've been in a punk crowd, yet instantly I felt at home enough to pick a cigarette butt off the ground and start to smoke it. I was really enjoying the music and the band was thrashing it out like pro's. The buzz from the mescaline was crazy in that place but still I wouldn't have traded it for anything. Eventually the time came for the main band to start the video shoot and I was hanging out with one of the few people in this life that I don't feel socially inept or maladjusted around. It was get to have that feeling intensified 10 fold by the mescaline almost reenforcing the feeling into my brain.
As the band came on the singer was already drunk off his ass and I could tell that it wasn't going to be the straight up thrash punk that I heard before. None the less they started to play there blink 182esque type whinny white boy songs, but that was not why I was here. Everybody was busy filming, and I busy watching all the detail going into such a complex operation. I can get no more satisfaction that seeing that taking place. So I start to mosh. After awhile I was taking a break as someone was chatting me up and Matt comes up to me and tells me his nose just got broken in the mosh pit.
So I get in there and wreak a little havoc before the show was over. Soon enough everybody was packing up and Matt was inside getting himself together for the train. I stood outside at 6th & Mission. One of the first spots I started scoring heroin. My thought turned to how long ago that was and just how much of a told it's taken on my life. No, there was no mescaline induced fix it for my drug addiction. I've really become dependent on opiates by my own force of nature and it's a long hard road to undo what I've done to myself. It's going to take along time for my brain to start to function as it should. Hopefully the people around me can stand me for that long.
I stood there watching pimps in velvet suites walk past me and some junkie lady with a pet lizard. No I wasn't seeing things, I really was on 6th & Mission. The group of junkies trying to find a missing 15 dollars was all the proof I needed. Matt came out after a short amount of time and we began to walk to the train station. At this point in time I was still buzzing like mad. Even more so just from the high of the filming and the concert. We sat in the train station after watching a drunk guy walk into a glass door, fall down, and instantly put the can back up to his lips. Recapping the nights events and making light of the broken nose it was truly a good time. Broken cartilage proves it.
I got off the train near the grocery store to get some dinner. Now by myself I could feel all the mescaline left in me making me drunk with a smile on my face a mile wide. I stepped into the store with the floro's pounding my eye's and not the slightest clue was I was going to buy. Soon enough I found myself in the frozen food isle taking pictures of myself with all the frozen vegetables. After I thought that might not be the best idea I ogled the pizza selection, payed promptly, and left to complete my frozen food cookery.
That pretty much brings me up to the present. Just finished the pizza and still seeing the letters fly off the screen. After coming up the trip manifested itself as one hell of a body buzz. It was great to connect with Matt on such a level, the mescaline made that level which we always seem to connect when we are together that much more present in my mind. I treasure the feeling I get from taking mescaline, it has to be my favorite drug, opiates don't even come close.
Getting in a freaking punk video while some random goth dude with white face, make up, and poofed up hair was getting head in the back of the room was pretty cool too. It's going to be interesting to see the video after all the editing gets done. I have to say that I couldn't have asked for a better premoving day. Now comes the hard part of living out of a suitcase with a synthesizer to keep me company till and popping up on random computers or internet cafe's until my life once again becomes situated. And with the right help and the proper planing it will be stable soon enough. Opiates have dragged me under without realizing the lure and I've found myself a lot farther down the line that I could have ever planed. I still love them but it's a part of my life I need to change and fill in with more productive avenues. All and all this will happen, thus begins another chapter of my life.
I decide not to let today turn into one of those day of surfing the web and playing Joy Devision at top volume and make an effort to get out of the house. Thinking has now become automatic and it's hard not to go with the thoughts running through my head and make any effort into getting up and out of the house. So I decide to make a mix tape and see just how far I'm going to come up. About 30 minutes later I'm sitting back pumping Nine Inch Nails through my system as the walls began to gain a colorful hue to them I get a phone call from my friend Matt who was going to be shooting a punk rock video at a club on 16-mm. I'd pretty much determined that I would be able to navigate and properly converse to any I may run into and leave my apartment to go downtown.
Once outside I light up a smoke and feel the metallic tinge run up my spine that only mescaline can produce. Every color is vivid and motion seems washed as if I'm in a dream. On the way to the train I run one of the people who lives upstairs coming out of the KFC. We stop and talk for a bit and then he comments on my John Wayne Gacy shirt telling me about clown college here in S.F. and how much clowns scare him. I couldn't keep they smile off my face because it was so dam funny, but he was cool and I think half joking anyways. And I continue may walk to the train. Normally I wouldn't write about something this mundane, save for the fact that as I was walking up the street I find a sizable metal pot pipe with a ball of hash in it!!!!!! WofickingHo!!!!! Needless to say I smoked the hash while waiting for the train.
The train ride was classic. People drinking everywhere, odd conversation and that uneasy feeling I always get on the train, but with fractal imagery if I closed my eyes. Soon enough I was downtown with a full on buzz and lost trying to find the place. As luck would have it I struck up a conversation with a local and he pointed out to me that it was literally across the street. So I go in and say hello excited not about being in some music video for a band I've never even heard before, but that I was going to get to see a good friend do what he loves to do, make film.
I go downstairs and wait for them to set up as another band plays on the stage. It had been awhile since I've been in a punk crowd, yet instantly I felt at home enough to pick a cigarette butt off the ground and start to smoke it. I was really enjoying the music and the band was thrashing it out like pro's. The buzz from the mescaline was crazy in that place but still I wouldn't have traded it for anything. Eventually the time came for the main band to start the video shoot and I was hanging out with one of the few people in this life that I don't feel socially inept or maladjusted around. It was get to have that feeling intensified 10 fold by the mescaline almost reenforcing the feeling into my brain.
As the band came on the singer was already drunk off his ass and I could tell that it wasn't going to be the straight up thrash punk that I heard before. None the less they started to play there blink 182esque type whinny white boy songs, but that was not why I was here. Everybody was busy filming, and I busy watching all the detail going into such a complex operation. I can get no more satisfaction that seeing that taking place. So I start to mosh. After awhile I was taking a break as someone was chatting me up and Matt comes up to me and tells me his nose just got broken in the mosh pit.
So I get in there and wreak a little havoc before the show was over. Soon enough everybody was packing up and Matt was inside getting himself together for the train. I stood outside at 6th & Mission. One of the first spots I started scoring heroin. My thought turned to how long ago that was and just how much of a told it's taken on my life. No, there was no mescaline induced fix it for my drug addiction. I've really become dependent on opiates by my own force of nature and it's a long hard road to undo what I've done to myself. It's going to take along time for my brain to start to function as it should. Hopefully the people around me can stand me for that long.
I stood there watching pimps in velvet suites walk past me and some junkie lady with a pet lizard. No I wasn't seeing things, I really was on 6th & Mission. The group of junkies trying to find a missing 15 dollars was all the proof I needed. Matt came out after a short amount of time and we began to walk to the train station. At this point in time I was still buzzing like mad. Even more so just from the high of the filming and the concert. We sat in the train station after watching a drunk guy walk into a glass door, fall down, and instantly put the can back up to his lips. Recapping the nights events and making light of the broken nose it was truly a good time. Broken cartilage proves it.
I got off the train near the grocery store to get some dinner. Now by myself I could feel all the mescaline left in me making me drunk with a smile on my face a mile wide. I stepped into the store with the floro's pounding my eye's and not the slightest clue was I was going to buy. Soon enough I found myself in the frozen food isle taking pictures of myself with all the frozen vegetables. After I thought that might not be the best idea I ogled the pizza selection, payed promptly, and left to complete my frozen food cookery.
That pretty much brings me up to the present. Just finished the pizza and still seeing the letters fly off the screen. After coming up the trip manifested itself as one hell of a body buzz. It was great to connect with Matt on such a level, the mescaline made that level which we always seem to connect when we are together that much more present in my mind. I treasure the feeling I get from taking mescaline, it has to be my favorite drug, opiates don't even come close.
Getting in a freaking punk video while some random goth dude with white face, make up, and poofed up hair was getting head in the back of the room was pretty cool too. It's going to be interesting to see the video after all the editing gets done. I have to say that I couldn't have asked for a better premoving day. Now comes the hard part of living out of a suitcase with a synthesizer to keep me company till and popping up on random computers or internet cafe's until my life once again becomes situated. And with the right help and the proper planing it will be stable soon enough. Opiates have dragged me under without realizing the lure and I've found myself a lot farther down the line that I could have ever planed. I still love them but it's a part of my life I need to change and fill in with more productive avenues. All and all this will happen, thus begins another chapter of my life.
