Guys these answers are much more what I expected.
Cfc, appreciate your conccern, apologies if I seemed over excessive in response,no offence was meant to anyone as I believe no offence was meant to me.
GF I am down to 12mg diazapam prescribed on my rehab taper for a previous addiction.
My opiate issue was tramadoland codeine and I was placed on subox, I have regular urine tests but I am seeing it through, I broke/relapsed on my benzo taper last week due to personal issue but got out of it after e days and I am back on course.
I am very commited to getting clean but am I scared aswell, yes certainly.
Suboxone with its long HL allows me to use stims simply as ....well lets face it, its a opiate, even at a dose it would offset any sides.
I have always known, been aware of enough guys constantly running benzos because they were pumping into much tren or test in general or over cooking the clen and eph plus using the eph recreationally.
I can assure you thats not my background, I never started on my first addiction tramadol 5yrs ago looking for abuzz....alll those day were long behind me in my youth lkng before my BBin lifersaver adventure began and I have always been responsible IMO with amounts used.
So I know I don't need stims because I dont like them and so only used pharma T3 with regard to thermogenic support however when I did used to use rhem I got very good results in small numbers as my diet is on point and I don't cheat etc thus in the next few months after my benzo taper is done (I will still be on suboxone) I feel I will be ready mentally to get off low level HRT/TRT cruising and start off with a anabo,ic phasemof about 8 weeks as I was taught before hitting the harder andros for 6 weeks.....in this period I will use insulin,I am very experienced with fast acting but I will not use generic GH and right now I simply cannot justify pharma GH to run with the slin.
I know the poor mans slin/dnp protocol is doing the round its seems and although a experienced DNP user in the past I would not touch it now as being around the physiques and knowledge I have aqquired being present at the 2012 and 2013 Mr Thailand and the new ASEAN bangkok classic where I met some pro's and very very! Chaty middle eastern coach he gave some slin protocols and peptide info to my "then" Boss of the Thai team using a double split 2 x ED training plan, fasted CV, low fat, high carbs and reasonably high stims.
Personally reset for me I would currently need a 3rd of the slin/carb intake which is also good as suboxone or not I don't want to run stim high or even moderate at doses or length of time, we are talking 6 weeks after all and only in my andro phase.
My only worry be odema and BP adding tren,clen etc plus the sudden water weight gain however I am presribed as said rampiril for high BP and would use 2 halves of dyazide fri night and sat morning if I get sock line odema howevef with my diet as clean as it is it should be a mininum.
None of of this is set in stone yet, I have all the compounds needed but I feel that clearing my benzo taper and 1st becoming accustumed to the 2 x each day train (although not every day) and the exact meal timing around two session and gauging any crossover slin points as I am uses to humalog in Thailand and have regular right now so I am researching.
I've done this sucessfully before on myself 5yrs ago and have used the procedure in thenmlast 18months on two individual kne of who could not afford GH ,one who ran chinese (bunk IMO) GH.
However I am in "rehab" which right now i feel is going sucessfully not only with the opiate therapy but the group meeting etc however I imagine I will be on suboxone some time so I am taking advantage of it by being able to use stims anspd thus follow the protocol I was taught as close as possible albeit ina more consersative fashion.
Let me stress again I usually run no stims at all and long anabolic test.p ,deca,EQ ,winnie etc for most of the time at moderate doses only hitting the andro for 6 to 8 week blocks again at moderate doses and only use pharma product whenever possible which in Thailand it was.
I have to have a goal guys, I won't be competiting.....I do not PT anyone here in the UK, I came home from my "previous life" in Bangkok because of a close family illness/death, after this since I was here and could use the UK free health service I knew it was time to clean up.
Honestly guys without bodybuilding through many dark phases of my life.....my mothers passing, break-ups,loss of a close child ( I was also a kindergarten teacher -lol) in Thailand.....,there is not many BBin KG teachers.
......and now this phase, addiction, a trap I watched sprung around me and I did not act until I had lost everything I had worked so hard for.
My tendency for dependency is offending me guys, I am no 90s throwback BBer looking to score bain and hit the clubs at wkend after a bicep sess.......even in Bangkok I did not succumb to

arty life' as I loved my jobs as KG teacher and a 'sub' coach ,TP for the TBAA guys......I even got in ok shape myself.
About 195Ib at 8% dry at a shortass 5.5....
Addiction took most of that too guys and a lot of my pride.
I got back in the gym here in the Uk in April at a 11.12 stone.....yes I feel fine to admit I fucked up on painkillers and benzos after a "trigger" .
....but I am fighting my way back but knew to get my diet in check, training before raising anything off a HRT level.
Again I do appreciate the level of concern shown here and it does show that I were a noob you seem a helpful bunch so I hope we did not get off on the wrong foot.
I won't to/take anything until I am 100% ready, being 40 now I take my health seriously.
I get my bloods done every 6 months and y last check 1 month ago was fine except for my HDL as I was presribed statins in Bangkok but here I am still waiting.
Liver values,Urea function,TSH (when I was off T3) were fine.
However as we know with addictions as with some of the stim concerns the mental issues are more the potential worry.
Lastly sorry I type too much......I guess there are easier ways to introduce your life story!
I hope that clears anything up, again sorry if anyone thinks I disrespected there opinions,I certainly do not in this game.