MDMA desciple
Ex-Bluelighter
as some of you know, i make a habit of IMing bluelighters -- and many of them IM me. there's something about those one-on-one conversations that's more rewarding than simply posting back and forth; you really get to know people. for me, bluelight is kinda' like playing pokemon. and i think that given enough time, god willing, i will collect you all. but there's one bluelighter i'll never get to know. never get to tell my stupid jokes to.... never get to pull into the Tussin Crew.... never get to bitch to about my horrible day.... i'm refering, of course, to quicksilver.
even those of you (like myself) who didn't know him have probably seen his quote in people's sigs, "raving is the wave of the future." it has always seemed so strange to me that there's a bluelighter who isn't with us anymore. maybe he's not the only one? maybe there are more -- i can't know for sure. but i've always been curious about quicksilver. now some of you might ask, "if you wanted to know about him, why did you wait so long?" that's a complicated question. ya' see, i've been on bluelight for a very long time -- that much is true -- but after i first registered i ignored the board for a great while. when i finaly came back, (and started realizing how special bl was) he died a week later. everyone was talking about it of course, but they didn't talk about him. i just couldn't bring myself to ask his grief-striken friends to tell me, a complete unknown, about quicksilver -- i felt like it wasn't my place. well, maybe it still isn't -- i don't know.
i was talking in an IM to RadarLove, and he made a comment to me about how i was a famous bluelighter. that honestly never occured to me; i never thought of myself as really being a part of it all -- i guess it happened so gradualy that i didn't even notice. well, i left chat, turned off the comp, had a cigarette and got into bed. i was mostly thinking happy thoughts, "they like me! they really like me!" etc. and then, as i was starting to fall asleep, his name appeared in front of my closed eyes, "quicksilver." and i thought to myself, "this is it -- i can finaly ask." i don't know what i'm asking for, really -- maybe just plain old curiosity -- but i think it's somehow more than that. i didn't know him, but the first thing that went through my mind when i heard he was dead (the VERY first thing) was "that could have been me."
well, for those of you who did know him, i hope this thread doesn't just drudge-up painful memories -- if so, i sincerely apologize. i just want to know something about quicksilver. what was his real name? where did he live? how old was he? what forums did he post in? was he funny? smart? was he a major postwhore, or did he only show up from time to time? what was his favourite genre? favourite colour? favourite food? anything, really.... i just want to know.
disciple
even those of you (like myself) who didn't know him have probably seen his quote in people's sigs, "raving is the wave of the future." it has always seemed so strange to me that there's a bluelighter who isn't with us anymore. maybe he's not the only one? maybe there are more -- i can't know for sure. but i've always been curious about quicksilver. now some of you might ask, "if you wanted to know about him, why did you wait so long?" that's a complicated question. ya' see, i've been on bluelight for a very long time -- that much is true -- but after i first registered i ignored the board for a great while. when i finaly came back, (and started realizing how special bl was) he died a week later. everyone was talking about it of course, but they didn't talk about him. i just couldn't bring myself to ask his grief-striken friends to tell me, a complete unknown, about quicksilver -- i felt like it wasn't my place. well, maybe it still isn't -- i don't know.
i was talking in an IM to RadarLove, and he made a comment to me about how i was a famous bluelighter. that honestly never occured to me; i never thought of myself as really being a part of it all -- i guess it happened so gradualy that i didn't even notice. well, i left chat, turned off the comp, had a cigarette and got into bed. i was mostly thinking happy thoughts, "they like me! they really like me!" etc. and then, as i was starting to fall asleep, his name appeared in front of my closed eyes, "quicksilver." and i thought to myself, "this is it -- i can finaly ask." i don't know what i'm asking for, really -- maybe just plain old curiosity -- but i think it's somehow more than that. i didn't know him, but the first thing that went through my mind when i heard he was dead (the VERY first thing) was "that could have been me."
well, for those of you who did know him, i hope this thread doesn't just drudge-up painful memories -- if so, i sincerely apologize. i just want to know something about quicksilver. what was his real name? where did he live? how old was he? what forums did he post in? was he funny? smart? was he a major postwhore, or did he only show up from time to time? what was his favourite genre? favourite colour? favourite food? anything, really.... i just want to know.
disciple