ezduzit68
Bluelighter
Real Feelings
These feelings I feel confuse me everyday
Frustration takes me over knowing that these feelings are now real
Reality strikes all at once by surprise It’s like a bolt of lightning streaming instantly from the sky
I’m rendered speechless as warm salty tears fall from my eyes
landing somewhat silently onto the paper which I write
causing scattered black letters to begin to blur along with my sight
I try and hold back this rush of tears
but there is no use they are a result of unknown fears
What do I do, Where do I turn
where is my liquor, my pot so I can burn
I need to escape these feelings I feel
an unknown fear that feelings are real
guilt and remorse is it all my fault
GIVE ME SOME DRUGS I NEED OUT!!!!
but there is no drugs around in this room that I sit
just a pen some paper and a bic lighter
by which these seemingly empty walls are lit
The room is large I can tell when I speak,
my words are returned with a resonating echo,like yelling off a high peak
I feel to scared to search for help in the dark, a fear of the unknown
An anxiety of what the lighter may have shown
I feel so frightened and confused,never more lonely and sad
I’m Constantly thinking of the drug life I once had
I was sitting in dark silence in a much smaller room
It was like the size of a closet where you put a broom
Although still alone, I had no urge to cry
I had little feeling at all, because it was just me and my high
But when the door was finally opened to find me dying slowly inside
The sight of the chaos and sadness within is a fear unable to hide
I wonder why for myself I could not fend
when all that was needed was to let out a cry
and people were willing to help save me from that high
Yet I chose addiction to smoke pound upon pound
To hide my feelings never to be found
And although It was I who chose to sit feeling alone in the dark
It is also I who can brighten my path
and conquer any obstacle addiction may hath
For addiction is forever instilled in my mind
and my sanity addiction will strive to find
but what addiction doesn’t know is that I’ve recently been found
I sent cries for help and have reached solid ground
These feelings I feel confuse me everyday
Frustration takes me over knowing that these feelings are now real
Reality strikes all at once by surprise It’s like a bolt of lightning streaming instantly from the sky
I’m rendered speechless as warm salty tears fall from my eyes
landing somewhat silently onto the paper which I write
causing scattered black letters to begin to blur along with my sight
I try and hold back this rush of tears
but there is no use they are a result of unknown fears
What do I do, Where do I turn
where is my liquor, my pot so I can burn
I need to escape these feelings I feel
an unknown fear that feelings are real
guilt and remorse is it all my fault
GIVE ME SOME DRUGS I NEED OUT!!!!
but there is no drugs around in this room that I sit
just a pen some paper and a bic lighter
by which these seemingly empty walls are lit
The room is large I can tell when I speak,
my words are returned with a resonating echo,like yelling off a high peak
I feel to scared to search for help in the dark, a fear of the unknown
An anxiety of what the lighter may have shown
I feel so frightened and confused,never more lonely and sad
I’m Constantly thinking of the drug life I once had
I was sitting in dark silence in a much smaller room
It was like the size of a closet where you put a broom
Although still alone, I had no urge to cry
I had little feeling at all, because it was just me and my high
But when the door was finally opened to find me dying slowly inside
The sight of the chaos and sadness within is a fear unable to hide
I wonder why for myself I could not fend
when all that was needed was to let out a cry
and people were willing to help save me from that high
Yet I chose addiction to smoke pound upon pound
To hide my feelings never to be found
And although It was I who chose to sit feeling alone in the dark
It is also I who can brighten my path
and conquer any obstacle addiction may hath
For addiction is forever instilled in my mind
and my sanity addiction will strive to find
but what addiction doesn’t know is that I’ve recently been found
I sent cries for help and have reached solid ground
