Waffle Sock
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Feb 20, 2014
- Messages
- 9,195
My 2nd experience with orally ingesting psychedelic mushrooms involved playing Grand Theft Auto 5 and drawing a picture afterwards.
I ate the mushrooms and drank orange juice. About 1.5 hours pass before the onset of effects. I know when it first 'hits' because I feel like time stops, and a peculiar but accurate description, would be the feeling of a plant observing the world. I feel like I have stopped breathing and everything just stops. I begin playing GTA5. The game looks completely different. There is a glow exuding from the TV screen. The ground in the game flows like water and everything within the environment appears to be moving at the subatomic particle level. Observing the video game, I feel my psyche mentally clarifying to me that this video game is an unreal simulation. It was interesting because, obviously, I had already known this. As I am controlling the movements of the character, he is moving incredibly fast beyond reason. Driving a vehicle in the game is very difficult as the car is moving way too fast to maneuver adequately. I give the controller to my buddy because controlling the character was too much of a hassle, also it was much more pleasing to observe everything 'move' with vibrant color and life. My buddy inserts some cheat codes. As he is playing, he exits the car in the middle of a busy street with the character and began indiscriminately shooting people with an assault rifle. This type of carnage is obviously the hallmark of the GTA franchise, but this time, it appeared hyper-real: Non-theatrical, no music, people screaming, rapid successions of gunfire, complete mayhem, disorder, and panic. I almost empathized with the slaughtered bots in the game, especially when one woman let out a 3 second scream of terror before she was gunned down. Then, I realized how sick for game developers to implement the realistic emulation of human emotional suffering after a public disruption of extreme violence. I began to contemplate rapid thoughts:
"If this video game is for entertainment, then this sadistic aspect must be entertaining to a degree for players"...
-"This video game serves as a platform to act out what you wish you could do in society."
..."Actually, anyone can do this in society"..
"BUT They don't have a reason to"..
"The reason could be that they just want to do it because they can".
[Then, I thought,] well, regular people have jobs to attend and people to socialize with.
"Who says people have to do anything they are expected to do or are told? People can do what the fuck they want. Someone could just completely say fuck it all and just shoot everyone to shit until he is killed, and it is possible for this person to do this without enmity, only for sport, which wold be facilitated with the personal perception of complete indifference to all life".
"BUT This is why morals are instilled"...
As, I was pondering, arguing, and chatting profusely and almost uncontrollably to myself [at this point I was talking/thinking so much that I figured there was no way my buddy could be following my train of thought, so I didn't care if he was listening or not] about morality while being amazed by the video game, my buddy used a code to leap over buildings. Then, I thought, "What if this happened in real life but the playable character was substituted for a super humanoid alien who viewed humans as game to be hunted for sport, as we do lower-classed animals (deer, rabbit, fish) or even bugs. The alien could be so intellectually advanced and supreme in every aspect of its existence that it doesn't even recognize humans as worthy creatures so it just destroys them for thrills while using advanced technology to defy known physics. Does that make the super humanoid alien immoral? Will the alien be immoral if it chose to eat humans for sustenance instead of other animals? These thoughts raced through my head at 3000km/hr. I was so overwhelmed with how many things I wanted to express verbally from my thoughts at once that I became upset that I was only one person, because I needed more people to spew out everything that I wanted to say.
As I look away from the TV, the room seems a lot more elongated than it is. There were periods where things seemed further, longer, taller, than they were but changed randomly. Once I noticed, it would change again upon another glance. I knew I was feeling the effects now, so I pick up an unfinished drawing of mine. I remembered that I wanted to create art while on shrooms. The picture is of half of a woman's face. I pick up a pen. As I lean toward the paper with the pen, I notice that the paper is moving like waves in the ocean, but the paper keeps its form. I keep looking at it, like "wow, this is really happening". So, I began to draw. As I was drawing her nose, I saw a line that reminded me of paratroopers. "What would it be like if a paratrooper jumped off a cliff and his fellow paratroopers jumped behind him" So paratroopers began to jump off the cliff and open their chutes as soon as they leaped. 5 or 6 paratroopers jumped. There was the stereotypical military marching music playing. I nodded my head to the musical rhythm as I was drawing. Some paratroopers were still ascending the mountain that they are hiking. It was very enjoyable to watch this happen. I was making this come to life with my pen. It was like a movie. Then, I thought "WAIT! How could this actually be happening? What the fuck!. What am I doing? Is this real?" The voice in my head suddenly became isolated and definitive, like an epilogue. "Am I losing my mind? Holy shit, I'm losing my mind!. This is what it must feel like during crazy people's last seconds of sanity! Shit, I'm losing it. Well, it can't be that bad since I feel good. Actually, I feel good and this is fun." I went from captivated->imaginative->loony->psychotic->terror->calm during the drawing. I look up at GTA which my buddy is still playing. The TV is glowing so much that the only thing that I could focus on was the pickup truck that he was driving in the game. The truck was driving off-terrain and the tires were kicking up so much dirt and grass that it began to fly off the TV and into this realm. I look down at the drawing and realize that the former paratroopers appeared to now be a composition of the woman's face. I began to draw the mouth. Drawing the oval shape of the mouth made me think of a scenery where indigenous tribes would rendezvous at night to hear an oration from their tribal leader. There was a big fire in the center where the leader stood and he had giant wings of a predator bird. The people were coming from down a mountain where the moon was prominently visible. The night was comfortably breezy and the tribes people were focused intently on the giant-winged leader. The scene was mellow and comforting to watch take place. . . Then, I realized, this was another movie that I actualized with my wandering imagination. I began to tell my buddy about this. Then, I realized that there is no way to prove that any of this happened because it was in my head, but he understood me totally because he is experienced. I just showed him the "scenes" that I had drawn within the picture that "animated" with my imagination.
I draw more scenes within the picture. I felt like I was in a realm within a realm that allowed for a different perspective of everything.
I lift up the picture to observe it.. then the picture is illuminated by a majestic, cloud of bright stardust that served as a spotlight... Every single line that I drew became vitalized and mobile... the woman that I drew, looks intently into my soul with piercing glance. I felt the energy and presence of life within the artwork. This scared the shit out of me, so I abruptly put the paper down. In disbelief, I was thinking "How could I have given life to an inanimate creation of my imagination that was once nothing?" The fear quickly became a love. I loved how the picture and the creation of the picture made me feel. Then, I realized that all of this is attributed to me, so I began to feel a deep love for myself. I felt like the picture of the psychedelic illustration of the woman vitalized to communicate with me the message that, no matter what, she will always love me and can return to me whenever/however in the form of art..because she is art. It was a breakthrough. I became emotional that my artwork reached out to me.
Mushrooms stimulate my imagination, increase my depth of critical thinking, and made me reestablish my love for creating art, which I had not done in years.
Before I came down, I had no idea how long I had been tripping.
I ate the mushrooms and drank orange juice. About 1.5 hours pass before the onset of effects. I know when it first 'hits' because I feel like time stops, and a peculiar but accurate description, would be the feeling of a plant observing the world. I feel like I have stopped breathing and everything just stops. I begin playing GTA5. The game looks completely different. There is a glow exuding from the TV screen. The ground in the game flows like water and everything within the environment appears to be moving at the subatomic particle level. Observing the video game, I feel my psyche mentally clarifying to me that this video game is an unreal simulation. It was interesting because, obviously, I had already known this. As I am controlling the movements of the character, he is moving incredibly fast beyond reason. Driving a vehicle in the game is very difficult as the car is moving way too fast to maneuver adequately. I give the controller to my buddy because controlling the character was too much of a hassle, also it was much more pleasing to observe everything 'move' with vibrant color and life. My buddy inserts some cheat codes. As he is playing, he exits the car in the middle of a busy street with the character and began indiscriminately shooting people with an assault rifle. This type of carnage is obviously the hallmark of the GTA franchise, but this time, it appeared hyper-real: Non-theatrical, no music, people screaming, rapid successions of gunfire, complete mayhem, disorder, and panic. I almost empathized with the slaughtered bots in the game, especially when one woman let out a 3 second scream of terror before she was gunned down. Then, I realized how sick for game developers to implement the realistic emulation of human emotional suffering after a public disruption of extreme violence. I began to contemplate rapid thoughts:
"If this video game is for entertainment, then this sadistic aspect must be entertaining to a degree for players"...
-"This video game serves as a platform to act out what you wish you could do in society."
..."Actually, anyone can do this in society"..
"BUT They don't have a reason to"..
"The reason could be that they just want to do it because they can".
[Then, I thought,] well, regular people have jobs to attend and people to socialize with.
"Who says people have to do anything they are expected to do or are told? People can do what the fuck they want. Someone could just completely say fuck it all and just shoot everyone to shit until he is killed, and it is possible for this person to do this without enmity, only for sport, which wold be facilitated with the personal perception of complete indifference to all life".
"BUT This is why morals are instilled"...
As, I was pondering, arguing, and chatting profusely and almost uncontrollably to myself [at this point I was talking/thinking so much that I figured there was no way my buddy could be following my train of thought, so I didn't care if he was listening or not] about morality while being amazed by the video game, my buddy used a code to leap over buildings. Then, I thought, "What if this happened in real life but the playable character was substituted for a super humanoid alien who viewed humans as game to be hunted for sport, as we do lower-classed animals (deer, rabbit, fish) or even bugs. The alien could be so intellectually advanced and supreme in every aspect of its existence that it doesn't even recognize humans as worthy creatures so it just destroys them for thrills while using advanced technology to defy known physics. Does that make the super humanoid alien immoral? Will the alien be immoral if it chose to eat humans for sustenance instead of other animals? These thoughts raced through my head at 3000km/hr. I was so overwhelmed with how many things I wanted to express verbally from my thoughts at once that I became upset that I was only one person, because I needed more people to spew out everything that I wanted to say.
As I look away from the TV, the room seems a lot more elongated than it is. There were periods where things seemed further, longer, taller, than they were but changed randomly. Once I noticed, it would change again upon another glance. I knew I was feeling the effects now, so I pick up an unfinished drawing of mine. I remembered that I wanted to create art while on shrooms. The picture is of half of a woman's face. I pick up a pen. As I lean toward the paper with the pen, I notice that the paper is moving like waves in the ocean, but the paper keeps its form. I keep looking at it, like "wow, this is really happening". So, I began to draw. As I was drawing her nose, I saw a line that reminded me of paratroopers. "What would it be like if a paratrooper jumped off a cliff and his fellow paratroopers jumped behind him" So paratroopers began to jump off the cliff and open their chutes as soon as they leaped. 5 or 6 paratroopers jumped. There was the stereotypical military marching music playing. I nodded my head to the musical rhythm as I was drawing. Some paratroopers were still ascending the mountain that they are hiking. It was very enjoyable to watch this happen. I was making this come to life with my pen. It was like a movie. Then, I thought "WAIT! How could this actually be happening? What the fuck!. What am I doing? Is this real?" The voice in my head suddenly became isolated and definitive, like an epilogue. "Am I losing my mind? Holy shit, I'm losing my mind!. This is what it must feel like during crazy people's last seconds of sanity! Shit, I'm losing it. Well, it can't be that bad since I feel good. Actually, I feel good and this is fun." I went from captivated->imaginative->loony->psychotic->terror->calm during the drawing. I look up at GTA which my buddy is still playing. The TV is glowing so much that the only thing that I could focus on was the pickup truck that he was driving in the game. The truck was driving off-terrain and the tires were kicking up so much dirt and grass that it began to fly off the TV and into this realm. I look down at the drawing and realize that the former paratroopers appeared to now be a composition of the woman's face. I began to draw the mouth. Drawing the oval shape of the mouth made me think of a scenery where indigenous tribes would rendezvous at night to hear an oration from their tribal leader. There was a big fire in the center where the leader stood and he had giant wings of a predator bird. The people were coming from down a mountain where the moon was prominently visible. The night was comfortably breezy and the tribes people were focused intently on the giant-winged leader. The scene was mellow and comforting to watch take place. . . Then, I realized, this was another movie that I actualized with my wandering imagination. I began to tell my buddy about this. Then, I realized that there is no way to prove that any of this happened because it was in my head, but he understood me totally because he is experienced. I just showed him the "scenes" that I had drawn within the picture that "animated" with my imagination.
I draw more scenes within the picture. I felt like I was in a realm within a realm that allowed for a different perspective of everything.
I lift up the picture to observe it.. then the picture is illuminated by a majestic, cloud of bright stardust that served as a spotlight... Every single line that I drew became vitalized and mobile... the woman that I drew, looks intently into my soul with piercing glance. I felt the energy and presence of life within the artwork. This scared the shit out of me, so I abruptly put the paper down. In disbelief, I was thinking "How could I have given life to an inanimate creation of my imagination that was once nothing?" The fear quickly became a love. I loved how the picture and the creation of the picture made me feel. Then, I realized that all of this is attributed to me, so I began to feel a deep love for myself. I felt like the picture of the psychedelic illustration of the woman vitalized to communicate with me the message that, no matter what, she will always love me and can return to me whenever/however in the form of art..because she is art. It was a breakthrough. I became emotional that my artwork reached out to me.
Mushrooms stimulate my imagination, increase my depth of critical thinking, and made me reestablish my love for creating art, which I had not done in years.
Before I came down, I had no idea how long I had been tripping.
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