psychoblast
Bluelighter
That's my strap on thread, have not yet made it a reality.
Have had prostate massage. Some thoughts:
1. Forget the poster who said to get enema or high colonic, or that you had crusty crap stuck in your arse. That's not the way it works. There's a wikipedia article on colonics that seems pretty clear that they are B.S. I'm pretty new-age, but after reading up on these, I decided not to bother. I do think an enema can help get you extra clean, though, before this kind of play.
2. You can find some videos on anal or prostate massage, some are very clinical / instructive (not like porn). Google and you'll find it. Joseph Kramer did a video on anal massage, maybe more than one.
3. It is about relaxing the O-ring. In fact, the relaxation creates a sense of letting go that I find enhances how much I feel of what is happening to the cock, too, so you get that as a bonus. I think this is part of why women can enjoy anal sex even though they have no prostate -- the relaxation of the anal muscles turbo-charges how much sensation they get from the genitals and even indirect stimulation can send them to orgasm.
4. If the girl's finger goes past the O-ring, you should not be able to push her out. Your tensing too soon or she is stopping short of where she needs to be.
I suggest:
1. Take it slower.
2. Use lost of lube (coconut oil can be good, organic).
3. Make sure she knows what she is feeling for, the prostate feels different from the walls of the rectum, like the side of an almond or something, or so I've read / been told.
4. I think you might want to start with a toy, not a finger. If you are tight, the toy wll teach you to relax (like a thin vibrator). And if it is lubed and she gives good, consistent pressure and you focus on relaxing, it WILL get up there where it needs to be. They make some that have a curved end specifically designed to reach the prostate easier (a straight vibrator / dildoe does not quite do it, though it can stll be good for forcing the relaxation.
5. After she has the toy up there for a bit, and you get used to being relaxed, she should be able to get a finger there without a problem.
Gloves can be good to wear for this, keep hands clean, easier to switch to doing other stuff without worrying about where you put that dirty finger, or having to take a break to wash hands. Just whip off glove (inside out), throw away, and proceed with other business.
In generally, I think it is good to not go diving at the prostate in anal play. Build up to it. Start with cleaning / soap, etc. Then go to butt massage that leads eventually to sphincter massage (all with oil), then go to slow teasing of finger or toy penetrating, then when you are relaxed and stuff then the hunt for the prostate can begin. It's my impression the prostate stimulation is better using pressure (like pushing a button hard) and not so much about stroking the prostate. But despite all this info., my personal experience is still somewhat limited so I defer to those with more hands-on experience.
A good tantrika or sexological bodyworker can also usually do anal / prostate massage. It may even be legal, depending where you live.
~psychoblast~
Have had prostate massage. Some thoughts:
1. Forget the poster who said to get enema or high colonic, or that you had crusty crap stuck in your arse. That's not the way it works. There's a wikipedia article on colonics that seems pretty clear that they are B.S. I'm pretty new-age, but after reading up on these, I decided not to bother. I do think an enema can help get you extra clean, though, before this kind of play.
2. You can find some videos on anal or prostate massage, some are very clinical / instructive (not like porn). Google and you'll find it. Joseph Kramer did a video on anal massage, maybe more than one.
3. It is about relaxing the O-ring. In fact, the relaxation creates a sense of letting go that I find enhances how much I feel of what is happening to the cock, too, so you get that as a bonus. I think this is part of why women can enjoy anal sex even though they have no prostate -- the relaxation of the anal muscles turbo-charges how much sensation they get from the genitals and even indirect stimulation can send them to orgasm.
4. If the girl's finger goes past the O-ring, you should not be able to push her out. Your tensing too soon or she is stopping short of where she needs to be.
I suggest:
1. Take it slower.
2. Use lost of lube (coconut oil can be good, organic).
3. Make sure she knows what she is feeling for, the prostate feels different from the walls of the rectum, like the side of an almond or something, or so I've read / been told.
4. I think you might want to start with a toy, not a finger. If you are tight, the toy wll teach you to relax (like a thin vibrator). And if it is lubed and she gives good, consistent pressure and you focus on relaxing, it WILL get up there where it needs to be. They make some that have a curved end specifically designed to reach the prostate easier (a straight vibrator / dildoe does not quite do it, though it can stll be good for forcing the relaxation.
5. After she has the toy up there for a bit, and you get used to being relaxed, she should be able to get a finger there without a problem.
Gloves can be good to wear for this, keep hands clean, easier to switch to doing other stuff without worrying about where you put that dirty finger, or having to take a break to wash hands. Just whip off glove (inside out), throw away, and proceed with other business.
In generally, I think it is good to not go diving at the prostate in anal play. Build up to it. Start with cleaning / soap, etc. Then go to butt massage that leads eventually to sphincter massage (all with oil), then go to slow teasing of finger or toy penetrating, then when you are relaxed and stuff then the hunt for the prostate can begin. It's my impression the prostate stimulation is better using pressure (like pushing a button hard) and not so much about stroking the prostate. But despite all this info., my personal experience is still somewhat limited so I defer to those with more hands-on experience.
A good tantrika or sexological bodyworker can also usually do anal / prostate massage. It may even be legal, depending where you live.
~psychoblast~
