sovereign110
Greenlighter
PREFACE: A Diamond in the Rough?
I have never seen such polarized opinions/experiences about any psychoactive drug until I went fishing for info on legal OTC stimulants, and became intrigued by propylhexedrine (which I'll call Propyl from now on) . Some say it's better than amphetamine(?!) while others suggest it's a total no-go due to reports of godawful taste, a "dirty high," and the miserable comedown.
I was intrigued to find out that propylhexedrine , the active ingredient in the Benzedrex inhalers, is structurally similar to meth, and gives a similar stimulation/high; you don't even inhale it, you get it directly from the cotton rod inside the inhaler. And those things are only $4.68 at the Walmart down the road! I went and got a couple, and decided to keep notes about the experience because I was interested in its effects compared to Adderall, of which I used to have a prescription for a few years.
I suppose I'll mention my intentions and relevant background info. I'm in decent health; a part-time job keeps me very active physically/mentally but when I'm not working my lifestyle is pretty sedentary :S My blood pressure tends to be mildly elevated during my checkups, but not enough to warrant serious concern from the doc. I was pretty tired the first day; I had been up all night but daytime sleepiness is a common (and annoying) thing I deal with errryday.
My intentions this first time were not to chase euphoria and get "high" so, unfortunately, I have no wacky stories about how my spirit animal rode the neon rainbow as it led me towards the center of the universe as I was accompanied by a four-legged man who looked like a cross between Indiana Jones and "The Scream" painting, and when I wake up I'm on the roof of the local bar in my underpants with a note beside me reading "keep lookin' for that core, maaaannnnn!!!" that has clearly been stained by my ejaculate. Nope, this time.
I chose not to chase the cloud for two reasons:
- A) I'm not sure I can get high from it, at least not without the wicked side effects approaching dangerous levels...apparently this stuff has cross-tolerance with Adderall, and even though I've been off that for about a month, I seriously doubt I can relive that amphetamine-like euphoria I had when I first started Addy years ago.
- B) My ultimate goal was to test the viability of maintaining relative consistency with its use, to treat my ADD symptoms (focus, attention, memory) as well as my persistent anhedonia, sleepiness, and lack of motivation. In a way I'm using upcoming experiences as harm reduction practice, to moderate myself, at a regular amount each day, without getting the urge to go ham and binge on it That'll help with addiction counseling...it was my egregious alcoholism that brought me to alcohol & drug treatment, but my light Addy abuse played a part too.
(Note: I'm under the effects of Propyl while writing this, so TL;DR is obligatory and I'll try not to ramble on and on or get sidetracked. At least, not from here on....I'll try
)
Other meds I'm taking: Bupropion (Wellbutrin), sertraline (Zoloft), trazodone, ropinirole (Requip), liothyronine, vitamin D3 supp, complex B supp
Diagnoses: Major Depressive Disorder, ADHD (inattentive type), social phobia, restless legs syndrome, episodic drinking behavior (booze-related)
DAY 1 5/20/17
- 2:30pm (+0h.00m): Cut off the parts of the cotton without a brownish tint. Propyl is the brown stuff. I cut the Propyl-Cotton into 8 pieces, and ate half, which is roughly 125mg...a rod is said to contain about 250mg of Propyl, but I've read it can vary a bit. I ignored countless DON'T EAT THE COTTON warnings online because I'm a lazy motherfucker and I didn't have any acidic juice with me (lemon juice seems to be the popular option)...but I was also a bit curious to try eating the cotton first and then lemon juice soaking after...those are just about the only ways I've read people take Propyl. Don't shoot it unless you have a death wish....IV Propyl will give you double vision and fuck up your brainstem and then you might die, so don't do it plz
Now, the most notorious thing about this oral ROA is the taste. It's a deal-breaker for most people. Other than Propyl, the cotton has two flavor additives: lavender and menthol. The taste is so gross, people who choose to eat the cotton usually stuff it in gel caps so they don't have to taste it. Cutting it into smaller pieces works too; I didn't taste anything, I just swallowed them by chugging water. Many people who claim Propyl is garbage and they had stomach pain/vomiting after administration also claimed to have swallowed 2-3 rods whole. Genius!
- 3:45pm (+1.15): I begin feeling some mild amphetamine-like effects: Minor boost in energy and a "feeling" I get inside, like a fire rising up deep inside me, and it's letting me know it's been lit, and ...aaaagh fuck this metaphor. Adderall IR always took 45 minutes to kick in, so Propyl-Cotton takes half an hour longer....some have suggested the cotton acts like a sort-of delayed release mechanism. I suggest not eating the goddamn cotton, unless you want to have a Very Special bowel movement(s).
- 4:30pm (+2.00): Now we're turning up the heat. Now we're kicking it into gear. Now we're bringing it to the next level. Now I'll stop typing idioms. It was like taking, say, 60mg of Adderall at once for me: I felt a moderate, comfortable boost in energy and decided to go get some shit done, including picking up another inhaler/lemonade ofc. While in my car I started singing along to a Pearl Jam song (plz eddie don't end up like kurt & layne & chris). This felt kinda fun; the anhedonia lifted a bit and I cracked a smile here and there. I also started talking to myself. Propyl, methylphenidate, amphetamine...dis stuff makes me somewhat more talkative, and I was the only one in my car, so it aint weird okay !!!
No noticeable adverse effects thus far (other than the reminder that I make for bad conversation).
- 6:05pm (+3.35): After getting home and spending a stupid amount of time reading shit on the interwebs and watching Twilight Zone (I could actually watch an episode straight through without pausing it to check on one of my billion browser tabs!), I start to feel the effects dampening. I checked my heart rate for the first time, and it was ~96 BPM. Not too bad; still in the RHR "safe zone." I could feel my heart pounding a little bit, but it wasn't uncomfortable or intruding my thoughts. I begin fearing the comedown, despite having adverse effects that've been hardly worth mentioning. I thought "Not yet, goddammit! Only been three and a half hours!!! FOR SHAME." I cut my second c-rod in half and start soaking it in the lemonade.
- 7:50pm (+4.20[hehehe]): Redose! What's the protocol here, do I reset the timer? Eh whatever. I drank the foul lemon juice. Yeah, the taste is pretty horrendous...however, I was a ridiculous alcoholic for many years who would drink bottom-shelf whiskey straight, almost every day. So, I was used to swallowing quickly and managing my gag reflex and generally tolerable to awful-tasting swamp filth. So I downed it without trouble. There was still some brownish tint on the cotton halves, indicating I didn't get the entire expected dose....
- 8:38pm (+5.08 ): I said fuck it and ate the two remaining halves just to be sure (+250mg in the end). After all, I didn't experience any stomach/abdominal pain or discomfort, so eating the cotton must not be that bad mirite?? Looking back, I think my inhibition was lowered a tad. Adderall did something similar, but I could never quite tell if it was lowered inhibition in the getting-drunk sense (though obviously not as disinhibiting as liquid courage/beer muscles), or if I was just more confident in myself and the way things are that I didn't dwell on what I viewed to be trivial. After eating a big-ass burger and fries, I start playing Heroes of the Storm. Video games are a big hobby of mine, but the rampant anhedonia I experience without a stim (or booze I guess) makes it difficult to start playing because I know I won't really enjoy it.
At this time I start experiencing occasional weird visual effects. When I stared at the computer screen I would sometimes see flashes or bends of light in my peripheral. If I would stare at, say, a photo with one or more people in it for a few seconds, the people appeared to move a tad from left to right, back 'n forth. No other adverse effects, other than a losing streak in HotS, but that's less of a side effect and more like "working as intended."![:\](https://bluelight.org/xf/BL_Images/Orig_Emoji/wrygrin.gif "wry grin :\")
- 9:15pm (+5.45): I start burping somewhat often. I've heard nasty things about the burps; I guess for most people the burps bring the evil lavender+menthol taste back up into their mouths and it's caused people to puke after a certain amount of burps. Welp, I guess I'm lucky...I tasted nothing, and to this day I've never had a lavender death-burp. I'm still feeling gabby, but no one's around so I start texting my BFF. We talk and joke about the dumbest shit; I won't get into it.
By now, the most frustrating Adderall side effect I've had shows its face in Propyl. I get ridiculous bruxism/jaw clenching. My teeth were happy when mean 'ol Addy wasn't making me hurt them. But now I am a slave of his half-brother Propyl, and he's an even bigger sonofabitch :S In addition to teeth clenching, I start biting at my tongue, as if I were about to chew on it for some reason. Maybe I was subconciously trying to kill my taste buds so I wouldn't have to taste this lavender shit in any case.
- 9:40pm (+6.10): I start feeling like a Really Nice Guy. This is one of the Addy effects I've been missing so far. I tend to get quite altruistic when stimmed, and get determined to help people with even trivial problems. I posted a few times on an alcohol/drug support forum I visit. Since there's no cure for alcoholism and no "magic pill" I tend to never share the fact Addy eliminates my desire to drink every single day I'd take it :D Getting a sobriety chip feels like cheating when Addy is involved; the struggle is NOT real :O BPM still ~96.
- 10:35pm (+7.05): I'm in a very comfortable state. Like, a serene feeling. Still none of the horrible side-effects I've heard of. I begin trolling a Facebook group I belong to and giggle like an irritating little girl throughout. Laughter: Another victim of anhedonia.
- 11:00pm (+7.30): Drowsiness sneaks up from behind and deals a critical hit to my stimulation. Hm, maybe I won't be up all night after all? Wait, maybe it's just a transient thing. I'll give it some time...
- 11:30pm (+8.00): Nope, not transient. I take my nighttime meds. A very mild stimulation lingers in me, keeping me awake for the moment. Trazodone will kick in shortly....
- 12:10am (+8.40): Bedtime. I hope to dream once again of Malpractitioner Town, where doctors hand out Desoxyn like candy.
DAY 2 5/21/17
- 9:45am (+00.00): You won't believe the comedown. I'm rarely afflicted by this awful condition, and this morning I awoke to it. My hangover consisted of none other than a mild headache. Took some ibuprofen and it's gone 30m later. lol? Well, I'm gonna try some more Propyl today and see if it will "Prope(y)l" me forward! I just thought of that! I have a good brain.
I went to take my morning shit... but only one small, lonely turd was expelled. Huh.
- 11:10am (+00.00): My tongue has a little sore on it
After eating bacon for breakfast (there was more but not worth mentioning after bacon) I cut up one c-rod into quarters. I ate one for some reason and then let the others soak in water. I read somewhere (Reddit I think) that one person has been taking Propyl daily for like two years 
they just put the cottons in water and shake it up once in a great while. One rod lasts them three or so days, I think. I was gonna see how well it worked, cause I might spike my water bottle at work :O
- 1:00pm (+01.50): Having been sipping the water on and off for the past couple hours, I start to experience mild stimulation. I also eat lunch. Buffalo Wings. Fucking delicious.
- 2:17pm (+03.07): I slurp up the last of the water. A modest stimulation has settled over me...motivation, energy, and focus all up. Anhedonia not touched >< You know, one thing Adderall would do is accelerate my urge to poop (when applicable ofc). It's just about the only thing they don't have somewhat in common. Huh.
- 4:00pm (+04.50): I buy two more inhalers from the store, toss one into da water bottle. The sense of danger I felt when I saw the 5-hour energies made me buy one. "What if I combine Propyl, a 5-hour energy, and, say, nicotine? Maybe throw some of that pseudoephedrine bullshit in there too, might as well put it towards a useful cause. All them stims...Will I become a deity?"
STIMULUS, GOD OF NOT BRAKING FOR ANYONE. LORD OF THE OLYMPICS AND GYM MEMBERSHIPS. ENEMY TO LETHARGIC EMO POETS EVERYWHERE. Lord Stimulus cannot hear your cries on LiveJournal, lazy emo poets!! Play more football!.....Wait, LiveJourn~? what year is th-
- 5:30pm (+6.20): En route to an AA meeting. Maybe I'll end up actually talking about stuff this time??? (Spoilers: I don't). Maintaining a mild stimulated effect. My ears begin ringing intermittently, though this could be due to the constant jaw clenching. I start obsessing over doing things perfectly, as I am while writing this. Here-a-comes the tweaking I do suspect! While driving to AA I decide to have a cig. I'm still a fairly new smoker, so I usually get that nicotine head-rush sensation, which simultaneously wakes me up and then relaxes me, if I wait a good few hours in between cigs. That's what I expected to happen...but I ended up being enveloped in the closest feeling to "euphoria" I had the whole time. From a damn cigarette?? I'll try to describe it.
I felt the head rush coming on, but in addition it seemed to be spreading a bit to other parts of my body. I felt kind of a tingling halfway down my arms & legs. When the head rush would normally plateau and fade over a few minutes, instead it fucking TURNED IT UP TO 11 AND MY HEAD IS FLOATING UP.
"WHHHHHOOOOOOOOOAAAAHHHHHHHHHH I CAN FEEL THE SKY. I AM IN THE SKY. LOOKING DOWN AT THE PEOPLES~" -my brain during a Propyl-jacked nicotine high
This persists for a little while. My mom, who was driving me, looked at me and asked me what I was doing. I told her she better pull her chute cause it's a long fall from up here. Then I had an awkward conversation about what I was experimenting with en route to AA; I hadn't told her till then. She rolled her eyes but it's legal so she smiled and shrugged.
My tummy feels gaseous; I haven't dropped a good chocolate dragon in awhile. Huh.
- 9:00pm (+9.50): Yeah I'm tweakin' on&off like a freakin' beacon. I'm creepin' on Facebook, I re-read and edit/delete every post I'd make to a forum beforehand. Sometimes I type out six paragraphs of shit - about 45 minutes' worth in this state - and then decide "Nah" and delete it all before leaving. Addy would do this to me when I binged on it. My hands are shaky.....well, they've probably been shaky most of the time I've been on Propyl, but now I notice it more and I'm constantly holding my hand out to qualify the trembling. Ear ringing continues to happen sometimes, and getting up+moving around made me sweat super-easily. I took a shower but by the time I got out and dried off, sweat all over my body was making me feel wet again. I spend 10 minutes obsessively blow-drying my body (not with the heat on of course!) until the sweat goes away.
Still have somewhat of a stimulated feeling.
- 10:20pm (+11.10): Adverse effects are fading. Still at the same level of stim. Starting to feel a bit restless. Too bad my bowels aren't restless.
- 11:23pm (+12.13): Slight dysphoria. Took sleeping meds. Half an hour later I was dreaming about that one time shortly after I started taking Addys when I was super-euphoric on the meds....I went to AA and everyone thought I was "on something" and I'm like YYYYEEEEPPPPUP UP UP, to the chagrin of some of the members who clearly wanted me to give them some-'o-my speed. Too bad. They're mine.
FAST-FORWARD - DAY 4: THE PRICE OF COTTON & FINAL THOUGHTS
~ Feeling....heavier....inexplicable weight gain... ~
- 3:00pm 5/23/17: Bought two inhalers and ex lax. Took ex lax then ate chicken and potatoes.
- 6:29pm: Began violently wrecking my toilet with concussive diarrhea. Managed to spot three pieces of cotton over 7 movements, but otherwise the water was swamp-brownish so I couldn't see shi- well ACTUALLY I saw lots of shit but no more cotton.
Human Law #24: Don't eat shit you can't digest i.e. cotton, idiot.
- Addendum 17: At least you didn't inject yourself. There's no internet in Hell, asshole.
- 11:29am CST 5/23/17: Starting to write a novel on bluelight, expecting to tweak out and make 172,928 minor edits, look up definitions of every other word so I know I'm using them right, look up shit on Wikipedia that has something to do with something, do a thing with that thing, then post the novel whenever.
Reflections/Moving Forward: Well, it's certainly been a neat experience so far. Who knew I could achieve amphetamine-like therapeutic effects from a fucking $5 allergy inhaler - maybe next I can get a morphine high from some anti-fungal cream?!
To conclude, here're the main things I've taken away from these last few days:
- It absolutely increases my productivity at work. Having to give up Addy made me miserable at work, as I observed myself moving slower, being clumsier, forgetting things more often, and thinking/talking slower as well...until I brought in my "custom energy drink." I sip juice throughout my shift, usually able to finish one inhaler's worth by the end. Fuck Red Bull; Propyllent gives me wings. Wings with jetpacks instead of feathers.
- Maybe not the best option for chasing cloud nine. Especially if yo ass is stim-tolerant to a decent degree. I didn't go into this intending to get high, and in reflection that was a smart move. The adverse effect profile for Propyl is fairly substantial, especially if you already have heart/other cardiovascular problems. Plus, you'll skyrocket your tolerance by continually trying to caress euphoria's succulent buttocks. Before long you'd have to buy a whole bunch of inhalers to get that same-ish euphoria, and that'll get expensive quick (Not to mention the possibility of drawing some attention to yourself if you're in a smaller town/city with only one or two venues at most that carry the inhaler). I guess if you're rich it doesn't matter though. Wait, if you're rich, why are you doing Propyl? Trying to identify with us plebs huh? I'm watching you-
- Adverse effects: Your mileage may vary. Methinks numerous people can react very differently to the administration of Propyl. So what adverse effects did I experience?
This report is complete, but I'll post a much shorter add-on report in the thread about my experiences since yesterday, when I've decided to kinda push the limit with the meds a bit more. Some....interesting effects, to say the least. Cheers!
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Tagged by Xorkoth
substancecode_propylhexedrine
substancecode_stimulants
explevel_firsttime
exptype_positive
exptype_bodyload
roacode_oral
I have never seen such polarized opinions/experiences about any psychoactive drug until I went fishing for info on legal OTC stimulants, and became intrigued by propylhexedrine (which I'll call Propyl from now on) . Some say it's better than amphetamine(?!) while others suggest it's a total no-go due to reports of godawful taste, a "dirty high," and the miserable comedown.
I was intrigued to find out that propylhexedrine , the active ingredient in the Benzedrex inhalers, is structurally similar to meth, and gives a similar stimulation/high; you don't even inhale it, you get it directly from the cotton rod inside the inhaler. And those things are only $4.68 at the Walmart down the road! I went and got a couple, and decided to keep notes about the experience because I was interested in its effects compared to Adderall, of which I used to have a prescription for a few years.
I suppose I'll mention my intentions and relevant background info. I'm in decent health; a part-time job keeps me very active physically/mentally but when I'm not working my lifestyle is pretty sedentary :S My blood pressure tends to be mildly elevated during my checkups, but not enough to warrant serious concern from the doc. I was pretty tired the first day; I had been up all night but daytime sleepiness is a common (and annoying) thing I deal with errryday.
My intentions this first time were not to chase euphoria and get "high" so, unfortunately, I have no wacky stories about how my spirit animal rode the neon rainbow as it led me towards the center of the universe as I was accompanied by a four-legged man who looked like a cross between Indiana Jones and "The Scream" painting, and when I wake up I'm on the roof of the local bar in my underpants with a note beside me reading "keep lookin' for that core, maaaannnnn!!!" that has clearly been stained by my ejaculate. Nope, this time.
I chose not to chase the cloud for two reasons:
- A) I'm not sure I can get high from it, at least not without the wicked side effects approaching dangerous levels...apparently this stuff has cross-tolerance with Adderall, and even though I've been off that for about a month, I seriously doubt I can relive that amphetamine-like euphoria I had when I first started Addy years ago.
- B) My ultimate goal was to test the viability of maintaining relative consistency with its use, to treat my ADD symptoms (focus, attention, memory) as well as my persistent anhedonia, sleepiness, and lack of motivation. In a way I'm using upcoming experiences as harm reduction practice, to moderate myself, at a regular amount each day, without getting the urge to go ham and binge on it That'll help with addiction counseling...it was my egregious alcoholism that brought me to alcohol & drug treatment, but my light Addy abuse played a part too.
(Note: I'm under the effects of Propyl while writing this, so TL;DR is obligatory and I'll try not to ramble on and on or get sidetracked. At least, not from here on....I'll try
)Other meds I'm taking: Bupropion (Wellbutrin), sertraline (Zoloft), trazodone, ropinirole (Requip), liothyronine, vitamin D3 supp, complex B supp
Diagnoses: Major Depressive Disorder, ADHD (inattentive type), social phobia, restless legs syndrome, episodic drinking behavior (booze-related)
DAY 1 5/20/17
- 2:30pm (+0h.00m): Cut off the parts of the cotton without a brownish tint. Propyl is the brown stuff. I cut the Propyl-Cotton into 8 pieces, and ate half, which is roughly 125mg...a rod is said to contain about 250mg of Propyl, but I've read it can vary a bit. I ignored countless DON'T EAT THE COTTON warnings online because I'm a lazy motherfucker and I didn't have any acidic juice with me (lemon juice seems to be the popular option)...but I was also a bit curious to try eating the cotton first and then lemon juice soaking after...those are just about the only ways I've read people take Propyl. Don't shoot it unless you have a death wish....IV Propyl will give you double vision and fuck up your brainstem and then you might die, so don't do it plz
Now, the most notorious thing about this oral ROA is the taste. It's a deal-breaker for most people. Other than Propyl, the cotton has two flavor additives: lavender and menthol. The taste is so gross, people who choose to eat the cotton usually stuff it in gel caps so they don't have to taste it. Cutting it into smaller pieces works too; I didn't taste anything, I just swallowed them by chugging water. Many people who claim Propyl is garbage and they had stomach pain/vomiting after administration also claimed to have swallowed 2-3 rods whole. Genius!
- 3:45pm (+1.15): I begin feeling some mild amphetamine-like effects: Minor boost in energy and a "feeling" I get inside, like a fire rising up deep inside me, and it's letting me know it's been lit, and ...aaaagh fuck this metaphor. Adderall IR always took 45 minutes to kick in, so Propyl-Cotton takes half an hour longer....some have suggested the cotton acts like a sort-of delayed release mechanism. I suggest not eating the goddamn cotton, unless you want to have a Very Special bowel movement(s).
- 4:30pm (+2.00): Now we're turning up the heat. Now we're kicking it into gear. Now we're bringing it to the next level. Now I'll stop typing idioms. It was like taking, say, 60mg of Adderall at once for me: I felt a moderate, comfortable boost in energy and decided to go get some shit done, including picking up another inhaler/lemonade ofc. While in my car I started singing along to a Pearl Jam song (plz eddie don't end up like kurt & layne & chris). This felt kinda fun; the anhedonia lifted a bit and I cracked a smile here and there. I also started talking to myself. Propyl, methylphenidate, amphetamine...dis stuff makes me somewhat more talkative, and I was the only one in my car, so it aint weird okay !!!
No noticeable adverse effects thus far (other than the reminder that I make for bad conversation).
- 6:05pm (+3.35): After getting home and spending a stupid amount of time reading shit on the interwebs and watching Twilight Zone (I could actually watch an episode straight through without pausing it to check on one of my billion browser tabs!), I start to feel the effects dampening. I checked my heart rate for the first time, and it was ~96 BPM. Not too bad; still in the RHR "safe zone." I could feel my heart pounding a little bit, but it wasn't uncomfortable or intruding my thoughts. I begin fearing the comedown, despite having adverse effects that've been hardly worth mentioning. I thought "Not yet, goddammit! Only been three and a half hours!!! FOR SHAME." I cut my second c-rod in half and start soaking it in the lemonade.
- 7:50pm (+4.20[hehehe]): Redose! What's the protocol here, do I reset the timer? Eh whatever. I drank the foul lemon juice. Yeah, the taste is pretty horrendous...however, I was a ridiculous alcoholic for many years who would drink bottom-shelf whiskey straight, almost every day. So, I was used to swallowing quickly and managing my gag reflex and generally tolerable to awful-tasting swamp filth. So I downed it without trouble. There was still some brownish tint on the cotton halves, indicating I didn't get the entire expected dose....
- 8:38pm (+5.08 ): I said fuck it and ate the two remaining halves just to be sure (+250mg in the end). After all, I didn't experience any stomach/abdominal pain or discomfort, so eating the cotton must not be that bad mirite?? Looking back, I think my inhibition was lowered a tad. Adderall did something similar, but I could never quite tell if it was lowered inhibition in the getting-drunk sense (though obviously not as disinhibiting as liquid courage/beer muscles), or if I was just more confident in myself and the way things are that I didn't dwell on what I viewed to be trivial. After eating a big-ass burger and fries, I start playing Heroes of the Storm. Video games are a big hobby of mine, but the rampant anhedonia I experience without a stim (or booze I guess) makes it difficult to start playing because I know I won't really enjoy it.
At this time I start experiencing occasional weird visual effects. When I stared at the computer screen I would sometimes see flashes or bends of light in my peripheral. If I would stare at, say, a photo with one or more people in it for a few seconds, the people appeared to move a tad from left to right, back 'n forth. No other adverse effects, other than a losing streak in HotS, but that's less of a side effect and more like "working as intended."
- 9:15pm (+5.45): I start burping somewhat often. I've heard nasty things about the burps; I guess for most people the burps bring the evil lavender+menthol taste back up into their mouths and it's caused people to puke after a certain amount of burps. Welp, I guess I'm lucky...I tasted nothing, and to this day I've never had a lavender death-burp. I'm still feeling gabby, but no one's around so I start texting my BFF. We talk and joke about the dumbest shit; I won't get into it.
By now, the most frustrating Adderall side effect I've had shows its face in Propyl. I get ridiculous bruxism/jaw clenching. My teeth were happy when mean 'ol Addy wasn't making me hurt them. But now I am a slave of his half-brother Propyl, and he's an even bigger sonofabitch :S In addition to teeth clenching, I start biting at my tongue, as if I were about to chew on it for some reason. Maybe I was subconciously trying to kill my taste buds so I wouldn't have to taste this lavender shit in any case.
- 9:40pm (+6.10): I start feeling like a Really Nice Guy. This is one of the Addy effects I've been missing so far. I tend to get quite altruistic when stimmed, and get determined to help people with even trivial problems. I posted a few times on an alcohol/drug support forum I visit. Since there's no cure for alcoholism and no "magic pill" I tend to never share the fact Addy eliminates my desire to drink every single day I'd take it :D Getting a sobriety chip feels like cheating when Addy is involved; the struggle is NOT real :O BPM still ~96.
- 10:35pm (+7.05): I'm in a very comfortable state. Like, a serene feeling. Still none of the horrible side-effects I've heard of. I begin trolling a Facebook group I belong to and giggle like an irritating little girl throughout. Laughter: Another victim of anhedonia.
- 11:00pm (+7.30): Drowsiness sneaks up from behind and deals a critical hit to my stimulation. Hm, maybe I won't be up all night after all? Wait, maybe it's just a transient thing. I'll give it some time...
- 11:30pm (+8.00): Nope, not transient. I take my nighttime meds. A very mild stimulation lingers in me, keeping me awake for the moment. Trazodone will kick in shortly....
- 12:10am (+8.40): Bedtime. I hope to dream once again of Malpractitioner Town, where doctors hand out Desoxyn like candy.
DAY 2 5/21/17
- 9:45am (+00.00): You won't believe the comedown. I'm rarely afflicted by this awful condition, and this morning I awoke to it. My hangover consisted of none other than a mild headache. Took some ibuprofen and it's gone 30m later. lol? Well, I'm gonna try some more Propyl today and see if it will "Prope(y)l" me forward! I just thought of that! I have a good brain.
I went to take my morning shit... but only one small, lonely turd was expelled. Huh.
- 11:10am (+00.00): My tongue has a little sore on it
After eating bacon for breakfast (there was more but not worth mentioning after bacon) I cut up one c-rod into quarters. I ate one for some reason and then let the others soak in water. I read somewhere (Reddit I think) that one person has been taking Propyl daily for like two years they just put the cottons in water and shake it up once in a great while. One rod lasts them three or so days, I think. I was gonna see how well it worked, cause I might spike my water bottle at work :O- 1:00pm (+01.50): Having been sipping the water on and off for the past couple hours, I start to experience mild stimulation. I also eat lunch. Buffalo Wings. Fucking delicious.
- 2:17pm (+03.07): I slurp up the last of the water. A modest stimulation has settled over me...motivation, energy, and focus all up. Anhedonia not touched >< You know, one thing Adderall would do is accelerate my urge to poop (when applicable ofc). It's just about the only thing they don't have somewhat in common. Huh.
- 4:00pm (+04.50): I buy two more inhalers from the store, toss one into da water bottle. The sense of danger I felt when I saw the 5-hour energies made me buy one. "What if I combine Propyl, a 5-hour energy, and, say, nicotine? Maybe throw some of that pseudoephedrine bullshit in there too, might as well put it towards a useful cause. All them stims...Will I become a deity?"
STIMULUS, GOD OF NOT BRAKING FOR ANYONE. LORD OF THE OLYMPICS AND GYM MEMBERSHIPS. ENEMY TO LETHARGIC EMO POETS EVERYWHERE. Lord Stimulus cannot hear your cries on LiveJournal, lazy emo poets!! Play more football!.....Wait, LiveJourn~? what year is th-
- 5:30pm (+6.20): En route to an AA meeting. Maybe I'll end up actually talking about stuff this time??? (Spoilers: I don't). Maintaining a mild stimulated effect. My ears begin ringing intermittently, though this could be due to the constant jaw clenching. I start obsessing over doing things perfectly, as I am while writing this. Here-a-comes the tweaking I do suspect! While driving to AA I decide to have a cig. I'm still a fairly new smoker, so I usually get that nicotine head-rush sensation, which simultaneously wakes me up and then relaxes me, if I wait a good few hours in between cigs. That's what I expected to happen...but I ended up being enveloped in the closest feeling to "euphoria" I had the whole time. From a damn cigarette?? I'll try to describe it.
I felt the head rush coming on, but in addition it seemed to be spreading a bit to other parts of my body. I felt kind of a tingling halfway down my arms & legs. When the head rush would normally plateau and fade over a few minutes, instead it fucking TURNED IT UP TO 11 AND MY HEAD IS FLOATING UP.
"WHHHHHOOOOOOOOOAAAAHHHHHHHHHH I CAN FEEL THE SKY. I AM IN THE SKY. LOOKING DOWN AT THE PEOPLES~" -my brain during a Propyl-jacked nicotine high
This persists for a little while. My mom, who was driving me, looked at me and asked me what I was doing. I told her she better pull her chute cause it's a long fall from up here. Then I had an awkward conversation about what I was experimenting with en route to AA; I hadn't told her till then. She rolled her eyes but it's legal so she smiled and shrugged.
My tummy feels gaseous; I haven't dropped a good chocolate dragon in awhile. Huh.
- 9:00pm (+9.50): Yeah I'm tweakin' on&off like a freakin' beacon. I'm creepin' on Facebook, I re-read and edit/delete every post I'd make to a forum beforehand. Sometimes I type out six paragraphs of shit - about 45 minutes' worth in this state - and then decide "Nah" and delete it all before leaving. Addy would do this to me when I binged on it. My hands are shaky.....well, they've probably been shaky most of the time I've been on Propyl, but now I notice it more and I'm constantly holding my hand out to qualify the trembling. Ear ringing continues to happen sometimes, and getting up+moving around made me sweat super-easily. I took a shower but by the time I got out and dried off, sweat all over my body was making me feel wet again. I spend 10 minutes obsessively blow-drying my body (not with the heat on of course!) until the sweat goes away.
Still have somewhat of a stimulated feeling.
- 10:20pm (+11.10): Adverse effects are fading. Still at the same level of stim. Starting to feel a bit restless. Too bad my bowels aren't restless.
- 11:23pm (+12.13): Slight dysphoria. Took sleeping meds. Half an hour later I was dreaming about that one time shortly after I started taking Addys when I was super-euphoric on the meds....I went to AA and everyone thought I was "on something" and I'm like YYYYEEEEPPPPUP UP UP, to the chagrin of some of the members who clearly wanted me to give them some-'o-my speed. Too bad. They're mine.
FAST-FORWARD - DAY 4: THE PRICE OF COTTON & FINAL THOUGHTS
~ Feeling....heavier....inexplicable weight gain... ~
- 3:00pm 5/23/17: Bought two inhalers and ex lax. Took ex lax then ate chicken and potatoes.
- 6:29pm: Began violently wrecking my toilet with concussive diarrhea. Managed to spot three pieces of cotton over 7 movements, but otherwise the water was swamp-brownish so I couldn't see shi- well ACTUALLY I saw lots of shit but no more cotton.
Human Law #24: Don't eat shit you can't digest i.e. cotton, idiot.
- Addendum 17: At least you didn't inject yourself. There's no internet in Hell, asshole.
- 11:29am CST 5/23/17: Starting to write a novel on bluelight, expecting to tweak out and make 172,928 minor edits, look up definitions of every other word so I know I'm using them right, look up shit on Wikipedia that has something to do with something, do a thing with that thing, then post the novel whenever.
Reflections/Moving Forward: Well, it's certainly been a neat experience so far. Who knew I could achieve amphetamine-like therapeutic effects from a fucking $5 allergy inhaler - maybe next I can get a morphine high from some anti-fungal cream?!
To conclude, here're the main things I've taken away from these last few days:
- It absolutely increases my productivity at work. Having to give up Addy made me miserable at work, as I observed myself moving slower, being clumsier, forgetting things more often, and thinking/talking slower as well...until I brought in my "custom energy drink." I sip juice throughout my shift, usually able to finish one inhaler's worth by the end. Fuck Red Bull; Propyllent gives me wings. Wings with jetpacks instead of feathers.
- Maybe not the best option for chasing cloud nine. Especially if yo ass is stim-tolerant to a decent degree. I didn't go into this intending to get high, and in reflection that was a smart move. The adverse effect profile for Propyl is fairly substantial, especially if you already have heart/other cardiovascular problems. Plus, you'll skyrocket your tolerance by continually trying to caress euphoria's succulent buttocks. Before long you'd have to buy a whole bunch of inhalers to get that same-ish euphoria, and that'll get expensive quick (Not to mention the possibility of drawing some attention to yourself if you're in a smaller town/city with only one or two venues at most that carry the inhaler). I guess if you're rich it doesn't matter though. Wait, if you're rich, why are you doing Propyl? Trying to identify with us plebs huh? I'm watching you-
- Adverse effects: Your mileage may vary. Methinks numerous people can react very differently to the administration of Propyl. So what adverse effects did I experience?
- Pulse/Blood Pressure: Well, my pulse never went over 96-104 BPM, at least not when I'd check it. I was always aware of my heart beating, but it never came close to chestburster levels.
- Mouth Issues: Both Propyl and Addy tend to give me annoying bouts of bruxism, jaw clenching, and tongue/inner mouth chewing. I already have one cold sore developing on my lower lip and another sore on my tongue.
- Tremor: Shaky hands aint so bad, but essential tremor is a bit irritating. I'd get that with Addy, too. Makes typing a bit jarring sometimes.
- Sweating: I sweat real easy when on this stuff, normally when I'm at work. I always keep water nearby and hydrate regularly. Also, it should be noted that staying up all night can also cause you to sweat en masse, since your body's not rested and working harder to do ordinary shit.
- Mucous Membrane Irritation: Dry mouth readily made itself known shortly after I started Propyl. It aint so bad cause I make it a habit to regularly drink water anyway. Right now my nose is all dried up so I'm trying not to irritate it lest I start sneezing life-juice.
This report is complete, but I'll post a much shorter add-on report in the thread about my experiences since yesterday, when I've decided to kinda push the limit with the meds a bit more. Some....interesting effects, to say the least. Cheers!
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