Primarily MDMA - 2nd Time - THC destroyed a great experience

[acurioususer]

While I've been reading bluelight for a few months, I've had no desire to post. I just felt I should share my experience as it led to the best / worst night ever. Everything isn't that well written as I'm still a little out of it.

Note: All names have been changed

Drugs:
Marijuana (smoked): 0.6g - 0.8g
Alcohol (shots & mixed): 10 - 12 shots
Hookah: 2 packs
MDMA (pill): Good quality
Marijuana (smoked): gravity bong

Experience

5:30pm
Liz and I began our night by smoking a joint. From there we watched a movie with friends. At this point, I was kind of high and wasn't talking to that many people. I kind of get, don't know if anxiety is the right word for it, nervous in public sometimes. After we ate, I eased up a bit but got pretty tired. For awhile on the comedown, I still couldn't really hold a conversation. We decided to drink about 4 shots each. At that point I was less quiet but still wasn't "where I wanted to be". At that point, we decided to go to Jen's apartment, a friend of Liz.

8:30pm
At Jen's, we drank a bit more. I had about another 4 shots but I still wasn't where I wanted to be. While we were drinking we were smoking hookah. The hookah kind of burned me out even more. At this point, I wasn't too energetic. At the party we went to, I found no conversation and started to doze off. Someone passed me a mixed drink (orange juice and vodka) so I drank it. I can't remember exactly how much I had but it was at least 1/3 of the bottle. After sitting around some more, we decided to leave.

12:30am
As I walked out of the party, I suggested to my friend Nicole that we roll together. She had asked for rolls a few weeks ago, and figured that this would be a great night to take them. Had I not been drinking, I probably wouldn't have suggested this. This was my 2nd time rolling after a 2 month break. The first time, I was pretty cautious. I made sure I had plenty of sleep, water, and food throughout the day in order to prepare me both physically and mentally. The only problem with my first roll is that I smoked a little too much before the peak. That led to a slight feeling of anxiety but it wasn't too bad. Overall, it was a great night (life changing in a way) and I told myself that I would try to make my second roll free of all other drugs.

12:45am
On our way back I grabbed my last two rolls and we took them on the walk. Back at Jen's, we smoked more hookah while the rolls kicked in. I remember drinking plenty of water beforehand, as the combination of alcohol, caffeine, and hookah probably dehydrated me.

1:45am
When the rolls began to kick in, I was extremely happy. Nicole and I sat on the couch together and played with each others hands. When I peaked, I asked Nicole if she wanted to go outside. While outside, we began to kiss, which felt amazing. The first time I rolled I didn't have a lot of physical contact with others (I was at a show) so this was a very interesting experience. The most memorable part of our time was when we played with each others tongues. The ability to feel the texture of my tongue against her's was amazing. After a half hour, we went back in the apartment and rejoined the others.

2:15am
When I got back inside, everything seemed great. Although my roommate was getting pretty sick at this point (too much to drink), I was still having an awesome night. I was able to talk to everyone easily, and I figured at this point that nothing could go wrong with my roll. I decided to take off my shoes and lay down on the couch. The next few hours were spent relaxing, and I spoke about my private life to a few others. By this point, there were only a few of us left in the apartment.

5:00am
I was nearing the end of my roll. I began to settle down, and was very relaxed/content with everything. Life felt amazing, and we were all hanging out, just talking. Since it was getting early, we decided to walk my friend back to his dorm who was extremely tired. On the way, I gave my friend Nick a call and apparently he was rolling as well. He offered to bring his gravity bong over to Jen's. Although I know from my first roll that THC is a bad idea, I completely overlooked the fact and decided that hitting the gravity bong would put me in an even better mood.

5:45am
After I hit the gravity bong, everything changed. I went from being carefree to paranoid. I started freaking out and couldn't look at anyone. I decided to leave, but halfway down the hallway I began to feel as if I was going to pass out any second. I went back into the apartment and drank some water which helped a lot. My view of the world had taken a turn for the worse. As I sat thinking about life, everything was extremely negative. I thought about how horrible of a person I was, and how everyone hated me for taking ecstasy and ruining their night. I felt like I had no control over my emotions. I went from being the happiest person in the world to an emotional wreck. When I was able to finally get up, my friend Nick walked back with me.

6:00am
On the way back, I kept on ranting about how horrible marijuana was, and how I had completely screwed over my night. I questioned my friendships and myself. I couldn't even think about myself without being disgusted. When I got back in my room, I had gotten the idea that the police were after me, and almost threw away all of my bud. When I tried to go to sleep, negative thoughts continued to run through my mind for at least an hour.

1:00pm
I woke up extremely depressed. I thought everybody hated me. I was sad that I wouldn't have any more friends. I sat staring blankly at my computer screen for the next two hours thinking about how I had just ruined my life. I figured a shower would help, but it did nothing for me. Any positive emotion that I had felt last night was gone. Although I could recall everything great that happened, I couldn't feel any of the emotions associated with the events. Everything was replaced by extremely negative thoughts, and I thought that everyone from last night would never talk to me again.

3:00pm
I decided that I needed to do something. I texted Liz and told her I needed to talk. When I got up, I asked if she was mad at me. She told me that I went silent after I hit the gravity bong. She also assured me she didn't hate me, which helped ease my emotions. At this point, I began to cry. This is rare for me, as the last time I cried was at my mother's funeral. Now that I think about it, I think I cried out of happiness, as it relieved me to know that everything was not nearly as bad as I had made it out to be. After I talked with her, I went to the dining hall and made sure to eat before continuing on with my day.

4:45pm
As I sit here finishing this report, I feel much better. Although the euphoria from last night is gone, I'm not depressed anymore. Talking with everyone from the apartment should help; however, I'm a little nervous about talking to them right now. I'm still kind of depressed as I knew that THC would screw with my roll, I just wasn't thinking at the time.

10:15pm
Just came in to look over this story once more. I talked to the girl I rolled with earlier and cleared a few things up. I'm still a little out of it but everything is a lot better.

Update: Still a little depressed. I'm not worried as it should pass in the next day or two. I guess the worst part about this whole night is that I only have negative emotions. I know I had a great night prior to the gravity bong, but I can't "feel" it (not sure if that makes any sense). My first experience with ecstasy/MDMA really helped me mentally and I'm sad that my second experience had to end this way.

Tagged by White Rose
substancecode_ecstasy
substancecode_mdma
substancecode_empathogens
substancecode_marijuana
substancecode_cannabis
substancecode_ethanol
substancecode_alcohols
substancecode_gabaergics
_combo_
explevel_secondtime
exptype_neutral
roacode_oral
roacode_smoked
roacode_inhaled

 

[Psychedelic_Shock]

I'm glad you had a great experience with MDMA, but I actually don't find it surprising the marijuana caused you anxiety. Marijuana is great and blah blah, but it really isn't for everyone. I am one of those few people that just cannot enjoy getting high without experiencing some major anxiety and paranoia issues. At one point in my life I enjoyed the relaxing chill buzz of the herb, but now I only get paranoid and think the worst of myself while simultaneously freaking out, even in the comfort of my own home. I have once smoked during a roll, but I limited myself to only two or three tokes and the high combined great with the rolling sensation. However, I have never smoked before or after though because I thought that it would only ruin the otherwise beautiful experience. At least you now know how you react to marijuana. What's the point in taking a substance that makes you feel uncomfortable? Good luck man.

 

[nwofoxhound]

All I know is that if you were my friend I woulda gave you a million hugs and told you that you were just imagining all of that and that you would be just fine / not to worry. Almost seems like my roll when I did marijuana, except my roll ended up being very lucid. There is no way any of your friends think any differently of you and there's no reason you should think that you're a horrible person or a bad person because the fact is YOU'RE NOT! You were most likely just thinking way too much and let your mind get the better of you.

I am sure all of your friends still love you and the depression feeling will definitely pass in a few days, if not sooner. I'm not too sure how familiar you are will Ecstasy, but this feeling is normal. The reason you're feeling depressed at least is because the E uses all of your serotonin, leaving you feeling stressed / drained and almost like a zombie the next day. Serotonin is the stuff that makes you feel happy. For example, when you like someone you get giddy and excited, that's serotonin doing its work. People use 5-HTP to help with this problem.

I think you should just try to relax, listen to some music, get a lot of Vitamin C and even smoke some weed - I find that after the roll, this helps with the depressive feelings, but I could understand if you didnt want to. Talking with friends is also a good way to get your mind off things. Just dont worry, bear with the feeling a lil while longer and it will be gone before you know it and you will look back and ask yourself why you were even worried.

Hope I helped. Good luck & much love

 

[acurioususer]

@Psychedelic_Shock - The first time I rolled I smoked a little too much but the anxiety passed before the peak of my roll. I knew I shouldn't have smoked this time, I just wasn't thinking...

For me marijuana is interesting. I think I'm at the point where I can no longer smoke large amounts. As long as I keep my consumption at a reasonable level I have no problems at all; however, once I cross a certain point the anxiety begins to come back.

@nwofoxhound - Thanks for everything. I've read up on Ecstasy a fair amount here and also read a few dozen reports on erowid. I know the feeling will pass it's just kind of depressing that my roll ended so horribly.

The interesting thing is that the first time I rolled I didn't experience any depression the day after. I did feel different, but it wasn't a bad feeling at all.

@everyone - Thank you for reading this / taking the time to post.

 

[His Name Is Frank]

I really liked your report acurioususer. I really felt like I was there rolling with you guys. In spirit, least. The more descriptive the report, the better I can get a sense of exactly what you went through and how you felt in the moments. Great first post. I see you fitting in here just fine.



*Note: I see this is your second time rolling. Words of advice. Keep the experiences minimal and spaced far between. You don't want to lose the magic, which is what prolonged use will do to you. Serotonin depletion is hell. Nothing you would want to go through.

Also, it's always good to have a benzo on standby. Xanax and Clonazepam are two that worked for me. Not together, of course. One or the other. They were always my go-to pals for after a roll, after a trip, or during a bad trip. Having a couple put away for the comedown will not only help with the bad feeling afterwards, it will let you enjoy your roll even more knowing that you have a safety net. So to speak. Of course you should have a prescription, because taking prescription pills without an actual prescription is against the law. The above advice of 5-HTP is good, too. I think of 5-HTP as a must-have if you're planning on rolling again.

 

[acurioususer]

@Frank - When you say "minimal and spaced far between", what's your definition? Before this experience, the last time I rolled was around 2 months ago.

 

[His Name Is Frank]

I'd say once every three or four months. Two months isn't bad, though. Just don't let it ever turn into a weekend thing.

 

[Pwninator]

I've had smoking too much weed ruin my nights before too, although not with MDMA. The last time it happened I was at a party. I had a few drinks, then posted up in the backyard of the guy's house where I was soon joined by people who came outside to spark up some herb. People started passing around bowls and each time the bowl got to me I would hit it, and more and more bowls kept being packed. Foolishly I didn't stop when I knew I was plenty high but kept going. I ended up getting really anxious, my thoughts were racing full speed ahead and I knew conversing with others was out of the question, I was way too high. All I wanted was to get the hell out of there. I find that indica dominant strains can feel a lot more "comfortable" and are less likely to provoke anxiety and paranoia, although I like sativas for different reasons. However smoking too much of any strain can lead to anxiety, coz all weed has THC in it of course!

I might add, my worst experiences with weed were with a gravity bong (actually a waterfall but they're similar enough), had a couple times where I got WAY too high and had to lie on my bed, with my heart racing, muscle spasms up the wazoo, and extreme time dilation - each minute seemed to drag on forever and all I could do was wait for relief to come as the stuff gradually wore off. So ya might want to watch yourself with those, just sayin'!

I'm guessing the reason you felt so shitty coming down wasn't just the MDMA wearing off, but also the aftermath of all that drinking, sounds like you consumed a fair amount of alcohol that night and perhaps the alcohol combined with the MDMA and the weed on top of that was a little rough on your body. I'm not at all surprised you felt like shit coming off of that drug combo. Next time I highly recommend using MDMA by itself and I think you'll finally have that perfect experience you're looking for

 

[pofacedhoe]

the key with weed is to not smoke too much and to know when to smoke it.

for me i have a pipe and i put a tiny amount in and wait for ten mintues after smoking and then feel it kicking in. i used to smoke shitloads when i was young but its pointless. if you smoke enough that it makes you unable to hold a conversation then this is way too much to me, a lot of paranoia stems from being unable to voice your fears- i dont let myself get to this point

weed is very easy to overdose on, know your limits and dont keep smoking just cos its in front of you (this is silly)

 

[acurioususer]

Hey guys just thought I'd update for anyone curious.

I'm back to 100%. My depression ended yesterday which is nice. Anyways thanks for all the support/posts. It's really nice having an online community to go to.