RhythmSpring
Bluelighter
I've recently discovered an extremely powerful method of administration of Salvia- Tea. Its power is really up there with Iboga, Ayahuasca.
It strips away layers of self-consciousness. Being under the spell of Salvia feels a lot like being under the spell of Iboga in a lot of ways. It grounds you and makes you face your own bullshit and phoniness, but in a gentle, good-humored way.
My first tea experience was life-changing. It was like a rebirth- The next days were amazingly real. I wrote this experience report about it: http://www.bluelight.ru/vb/threads/670417-Salvia-Tea-Experienced-Smooth-Subtle-and-Powerful
Then I had a mushroom trip, which was light-years more lucid, positive, grounded, meaningful and powerful than all my previous mushroom trips. I felt like I had truly "arrived," but in a selfless, dynamic way. This feeling lasted for days...
...Until I decided to drink Salvia tea *again.* Quit while you're ahead, right? Not me.
I broke my own rules: I had emphasized to myself the importance of taking it *slow* with Salvia, and using moderation. Taking little sips. For some reason, I took a few gulps from the cup itself. Then a friend walked in the room with some weird personal things to say. I was not interested, but I conversed anyway. I directed my visionary consciousness to her, and not inward.
I'm not sure when exactly it happened, but something bad happened. Spiritually. I feel like I completely lost all the progress I had made in the week prior, and actually in the many years prior to this experience. I feel like I've regressed to 3rd grade mentality--susceptible to the dysfunctional energies of others, and with almost no conceptualizations about life, the universe and everything. This is very unusual for me. I'm historically an active, sharp thinker.
I feel dumb. Spaced out. Like I've lost a large piece of myself, a bright, shining, crystalline consciousness connected to an open heart. I feel empty in my mind, empty in my heart, too. Where are my feelings? Where is my drive? Where is my ego? Where is my power? When I said my mushroom trip was powerful, that also meant that *I* was feeling immense amounts of balanced, sturdy power, and that power continued well after the trip.
Now it's gone. No trace. I feel as powerful as a third grader. My mind feels empty, which usually feels great, except now, it also feels devoid of so many wonderful things. Also, my heart. I feel so depressed. Salvia usually doesn't do this to me.
Help me. I'm afraid I've lost "it," and permanently. It's been over three days, and the usual thought-forms that help me connect to people are gone. I'm scared. My body even feels different, like it did years ago when I was very depressed. My sleeping patterns have changed (for the worse), and my sensitivity to temperature as well, just to name a few physical differences.
Has anyone felt this way before? Like, a blank mind, but like, REALLY blank, and scarily so?
~RS
It strips away layers of self-consciousness. Being under the spell of Salvia feels a lot like being under the spell of Iboga in a lot of ways. It grounds you and makes you face your own bullshit and phoniness, but in a gentle, good-humored way.
My first tea experience was life-changing. It was like a rebirth- The next days were amazingly real. I wrote this experience report about it: http://www.bluelight.ru/vb/threads/670417-Salvia-Tea-Experienced-Smooth-Subtle-and-Powerful
Then I had a mushroom trip, which was light-years more lucid, positive, grounded, meaningful and powerful than all my previous mushroom trips. I felt like I had truly "arrived," but in a selfless, dynamic way. This feeling lasted for days...
...Until I decided to drink Salvia tea *again.* Quit while you're ahead, right? Not me.
I broke my own rules: I had emphasized to myself the importance of taking it *slow* with Salvia, and using moderation. Taking little sips. For some reason, I took a few gulps from the cup itself. Then a friend walked in the room with some weird personal things to say. I was not interested, but I conversed anyway. I directed my visionary consciousness to her, and not inward.
I'm not sure when exactly it happened, but something bad happened. Spiritually. I feel like I completely lost all the progress I had made in the week prior, and actually in the many years prior to this experience. I feel like I've regressed to 3rd grade mentality--susceptible to the dysfunctional energies of others, and with almost no conceptualizations about life, the universe and everything. This is very unusual for me. I'm historically an active, sharp thinker.
I feel dumb. Spaced out. Like I've lost a large piece of myself, a bright, shining, crystalline consciousness connected to an open heart. I feel empty in my mind, empty in my heart, too. Where are my feelings? Where is my drive? Where is my ego? Where is my power? When I said my mushroom trip was powerful, that also meant that *I* was feeling immense amounts of balanced, sturdy power, and that power continued well after the trip.
Now it's gone. No trace. I feel as powerful as a third grader. My mind feels empty, which usually feels great, except now, it also feels devoid of so many wonderful things. Also, my heart. I feel so depressed. Salvia usually doesn't do this to me.
Help me. I'm afraid I've lost "it," and permanently. It's been over three days, and the usual thought-forms that help me connect to people are gone. I'm scared. My body even feels different, like it did years ago when I was very depressed. My sleeping patterns have changed (for the worse), and my sensitivity to temperature as well, just to name a few physical differences.
Has anyone felt this way before? Like, a blank mind, but like, REALLY blank, and scarily so?
~RS
