Phenobarbital and/or clonazepam for my VERY treatment resistant epilepsy.

[sappyfoo]

Sorry for the length it started out as my about me but I decided it was just gonna be a long long question in a new thread. Please read and help!

My name is Kasey. I am male, not female let's just get that clear. I am an LPN and am very young to be. I'm also very young to be on disability but that also means that I'm really screwed up from my Epilepsy it has just been progressing to worse. Status epilepticus twice no three times in the past week. Coulda died luckily my great friend whom I love a lot was there for two of them. Anyway, I graduated from high school at 15 mad college by 19. I was aiming to become a Registered Nurse but I was unable to complete the extra duration required of schooling to acquire the RN credentials over LPN. My epilepsy my whole life has been a severe treatment resistant form which also presents itself in many different ways such as being classified as multiple different types of seizures making it incredibly hard to figure out the most affective and proper and safe medication/treatment to use. I have taken phenobarbital and clonazepam most of my life alternating once tolerance to one was maxed out switch to the other. I was found to be treatment resistant to all other tried medications with bad side affects and in three different ones I am rapidly deathly allergic to. EMT's now know all around this area that I am who I am and to NOT EVER give me IV Phenytoin for status epilepticus. Anyway, when doctors found out I was a heroin addict they stopped my clonazepam or phenobarbital and have me relying only on 200 Mg's lamotrigine bid and 300 Mg's lyrica noc because they think I abuse them. Or at that point they thought I MIGHT abuse them because I had never abused them. I never really knew that when I was younger you could get high off them. Not until my second float on MMT. The first go around in Tacoma I knew that benzos will Immediately get you kicked off regardless if it is for epilepsy or not. In Seattle my second go Xanax klonopin Valium Ativan, those were ALL constantly and frequently we're being sold or traded for other shit all up and down [no locations]. So of course I tried Xanax just 1 mg with my probably 40 or 50 mg dose of juice and it fucked me up SO GOOD and so funking amazing feeling I had discovered a great and easy way to feel like you shot up the best dope ever without shooting anything up and still staying clean from heroin. It had created a bad addiction and dependency that I am now over and do not need treatment for, I was so addicted to the benzos that I was medically dead 4 times from my heart stopping. But I need and HAVE to get back on clonazepam or lorazepam or preferably pentobarbital or phenobarbital. They have a MUCH longer duration of action and the tolerance to their anticonvulsant affects take A HELL of a lot longer to develop. But ANYTHING that is indicated for epilepsy that is a benzodiazepine or barbiturate or even non indicated Benz or barbs would work wonders right now. I received both pheno and clonazepam from my suboxone doc he had no problem filling it until I missed my neuro video EEG TWICE that is when he cut me off. He said no more until AFTER it is completed but its been really bad the past week and only keeps sticking around and at random getting really bad. He's seen other EEG's of mine many and he knows that I'm super treatment resistant. When I go in there Friday and I have all y paperwork from the hospital with me and I'm going to bring in kali my friend that saved my life by catching my head before it was smashed on concrete steps. And I am going to ask him to script me clonazepam or preferably pheno to control my seizures and that I would be willing to come in every day to every other day (excluding weekends ) to get my daily dose and then take home doses for the rest of the day and the next. If my willing to come in and dose often in front of them and I'm showing them I'm really serious I feel mad seriously incredibly bad you have no clue. I don't want to a abuse. I want it therapeutically. I do not see how me requesting my Meds and even agreeing to a methadone maintenance style dosing that I wouldn't be approved. What are everyone else's thoughts on this?



Sorry for the length of this but I was typing an about me in bluelight and it ended up turning into a LONG posting question. Thank you!!

 

[Lightning-Nl]

Maybe.....neither.

I am not advocating Marijuana use. However, I've heard of cases just like yours - where people weren't responding to Benzodiazepines or Barbiturates very well, but actually responded amazingly to CBD (Cannabidiol) which is one of the main psychoactive components of Marijuana.



If you're serious about sticking to Neuroleptics though. I'd really recommend Clonazepam, unless you don't respond to it. Phenobarbital, while it is more powerful (as far as I'm aware) has many more adverse side-effects than Clonazepam. In fact, Barbiturates in general have more adverse side-effects than Benzodiazepines. So try Clonazepam first.

You need to stop the opiates. Right now. It will make your epilepsy worse in the long-term, you won't be able to get treatment for your severe (and life threatening) seizures and, besides that, needle use is horrible for you. (You didn't mention if you were shooting though) Get off the Heroin, get off the Suboxone, get off the Methadone. Do it right now.

 

[missmeyet?]

So I'm curious about a few thing...did you ever get to work as an LPN? I. Know in the state I used to live in you had to be 19 to be licensed as an LPN..and you said you were disabled now so I was just wondering..

I'm also amazed that benzos felt like a shot of heroin to you. I guess everyone is different. Also, I'm not sure I understood exactly..you are currently in treatment for opiates/opioids? The doc is willing to give you the meds you want as long as you go get your test done? Why not just go have it done? It is definitely an incentive to do it.

I know that it upsets you that the docs don't trust you to take the meds that you believe that. You need. It happens all the time to people have abuse or have a history of drug abuse...its not necessarily fair but it is a fact of life. Also, being that you are only 19 ,you have that going against you also. If you are super smart I'm sure you understand why it is that way...especially if you have ever actually worked in the medical field. In answer to your questions, I honestly feel you will be lucky if he prescibes meds that are "abusable". Anyone that has experience with dependence or addiction will tell you we have all been in a situation where we have experienced bias and not received the same care we would if the situation was otherwise.

Can you not find a new doctor? That would be my very first step! (That and go get the requested diagnostics done if he is willing to give you meds after that is completed).

*edit* also, if you wish to have more people read your post and respond then jump back in and break it up into paragraphs (it is actually in the rules!)....especially with it so long. Most people won't bother to read it!

 

[sekio]

This isn't appropriate for NsPD, it's blog material. More importantly, we can't tell you how to get prescribed benzos.

the tolerance to their anticonvulsant affects take A HELL of a lot longer to develop.

Not always. And, just for the record, telling doctors you HAVE to be on benzos is textbook drug seeking...

I'm also amazed that benzos felt like a shot of heroin to you.

He/she is talking about benzos plus methadone. Which, of course, is gonna be euphoric... the reason doctors don't like combing the two is because it ends in death a lot of the time.