Hedonistica
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Sep 5, 2014
- Messages
- 116
Had a weird time lately - a while ago quit codeine and had a brief flirtation with kratom again, followed by some extremely stressful life events.
I had used phenibut in the past, and the reason I stopped using it was that it made it impossible to have an orgasm (I am male) while it actually increased sex drive.
So hadn't used it for years, but with all the stress, and not being able to use codeine, I decided to get some phenibut, and at first, it went well. I found I could relax a bit and had some nice effects on social anxiety and sleep, though I dosed too much and ended up unable to stand the first night (I forgot how long it takes to kick in and took more).
Anyway, about a week later, I started to develop some weird symptoms, I would be typing on my laptop, and my finger would be twitching and clicking the touchpad by mistake, this was in both fingers and seemed connected to my pulse. At first I thought this was a weird anxiety system from the stress overload, so began taking more phenibut, and the symptoms continued to get worse, presenting as a weird heart arrythmia, I would keep hearing my heartbeat in my ear and have all kinds of brain and body zaps. My sex drive was ramped up to the nth degree, but I could only orgasm with much effort and difficulty. I stopped being able to sleep for more than a few hours, and started to experience extreme anger, my ability to manage emotions and stress went completely out of the window (I am normally very level headed and calm after years of meditation practice) and I started feeling very hostile to everyone, and even cut a few friends off altogether.
I was taking up to 4g of phenibut a day by this point, I know this is not a good idea, my mistake was thinking that my increased agitation was down to withdrawal, as when I took more it would just get worse. Thinking it was PAWS, I ended up back on the codeine, which made pretty much no difference at all.
Last night things were getting worse, I was lying awake, couldn't sleep, and all I could hear was this weird heartbeat thing in my ear along with my fingers twitching and my brain having these weird zaps all the time, couldn't sleep at all, got up and felt in a complete state, full of anger and hostility for everything and everyone around me.
I decided that maybe the phenibut was maybe causing all this, and decided to do a rapid taper, so instead of maybe having 1,2g for breakfast and then increments of 900mg at a time, I ended up have 1.8g over the course of the day, and by evening I decided to stop altogether.
Things were still weird for the afternoon, but by late evening the twitching fingers and hearbeat echoing symptoms were gone, and I feel far more relaxed than I have in weeks. I'm not naive enough to believe I can avoid withdrawal completely, but am going to wait and see as if that was what phenibut was doing then withdrawing from that might be actually paradoxically pleasant. My mood has elevated and my response to some very stressful stimuli has just flatlined.
I've read that benzodiazapenes can have all kinds of paradoxical reactions (people have even been driven to kill or self harm) so wonder if this might be true of phenibut? I can't find too much information on the web so thought I would check in with the collective wisdom here to see if anyone has heard of anything similar happening.
It simply can't be a coincidence that I dropped my dose, and now all the problems have gone! This is not to criticise phenibut, I have heard of its addiction potential, but I seem to have weird genetics in other regards, so perhaps there was just a perfect storm of things that led to this paradoxical reaction?
I had used phenibut in the past, and the reason I stopped using it was that it made it impossible to have an orgasm (I am male) while it actually increased sex drive.
So hadn't used it for years, but with all the stress, and not being able to use codeine, I decided to get some phenibut, and at first, it went well. I found I could relax a bit and had some nice effects on social anxiety and sleep, though I dosed too much and ended up unable to stand the first night (I forgot how long it takes to kick in and took more).
Anyway, about a week later, I started to develop some weird symptoms, I would be typing on my laptop, and my finger would be twitching and clicking the touchpad by mistake, this was in both fingers and seemed connected to my pulse. At first I thought this was a weird anxiety system from the stress overload, so began taking more phenibut, and the symptoms continued to get worse, presenting as a weird heart arrythmia, I would keep hearing my heartbeat in my ear and have all kinds of brain and body zaps. My sex drive was ramped up to the nth degree, but I could only orgasm with much effort and difficulty. I stopped being able to sleep for more than a few hours, and started to experience extreme anger, my ability to manage emotions and stress went completely out of the window (I am normally very level headed and calm after years of meditation practice) and I started feeling very hostile to everyone, and even cut a few friends off altogether.
I was taking up to 4g of phenibut a day by this point, I know this is not a good idea, my mistake was thinking that my increased agitation was down to withdrawal, as when I took more it would just get worse. Thinking it was PAWS, I ended up back on the codeine, which made pretty much no difference at all.
Last night things were getting worse, I was lying awake, couldn't sleep, and all I could hear was this weird heartbeat thing in my ear along with my fingers twitching and my brain having these weird zaps all the time, couldn't sleep at all, got up and felt in a complete state, full of anger and hostility for everything and everyone around me.
I decided that maybe the phenibut was maybe causing all this, and decided to do a rapid taper, so instead of maybe having 1,2g for breakfast and then increments of 900mg at a time, I ended up have 1.8g over the course of the day, and by evening I decided to stop altogether.
Things were still weird for the afternoon, but by late evening the twitching fingers and hearbeat echoing symptoms were gone, and I feel far more relaxed than I have in weeks. I'm not naive enough to believe I can avoid withdrawal completely, but am going to wait and see as if that was what phenibut was doing then withdrawing from that might be actually paradoxically pleasant. My mood has elevated and my response to some very stressful stimuli has just flatlined.
I've read that benzodiazapenes can have all kinds of paradoxical reactions (people have even been driven to kill or self harm) so wonder if this might be true of phenibut? I can't find too much information on the web so thought I would check in with the collective wisdom here to see if anyone has heard of anything similar happening.
It simply can't be a coincidence that I dropped my dose, and now all the problems have gone! This is not to criticise phenibut, I have heard of its addiction potential, but I seem to have weird genetics in other regards, so perhaps there was just a perfect storm of things that led to this paradoxical reaction?
