perplexed and slightly drunken ramblings to you.

[Shuddr2Think]

i am so damned tired of walking this
self imposed tightrope.
on one side happiness
on the other..
nothing.
with the highs come the lows
and as always
i can't seem to grasp
why is there no middle ground
why can i not float happily and content
somewhere in the middle
i guess i am just
too tired of one word (or lack of)
making or breaking my world
words and phrases and voices in the background getting read into
until they lose all their meaning
and i still don't find any answers
i guess i just wish
i had a shoulder to put my head on
and i wish it was yours
i wish i had a chance in the world
to be more than anything i am not already
and i wish it didn't feel like
unknowingly and consistently
you make me stop and start
never giving me any idea as to
what direction this is going
and i hate to bother you
and i don't mean to cause a scene
but im feeling a little too fragile
to deal with this game right now
and since you are my friend
i hope you will understand
how simple it would all be
if you just said something
anything to make it real
to convince me this isn't all in my head
coz i am sick of this
i am sick of not moving
motionless and drifting
i need something solid to call my own
something to make me feel real
something like you
(or what you are in my head)
because quite frankly
you make too much sense for me
and you seem too together to be real
forcing me to doubt it even more
and until i get a sign
i think i may just give up.
(but i don't want to lose this chance)

 

[E-girl]

you know i love your work. this was fabulous, as usual.

 

[yoUr bLiSS]

ditto what e-girl said....

and i hate to bother you
and i don't mean to cause a scene

i guess i just wish
i had a shoulder to put my head on
and i wish it was yours
ouch! i feel these ones....