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🌟🌟 Social 🌟🌟 PD Social Thread 2022-2025 v. Year of the Phenethylamine

Buzz Lightbeer said:
Fgy1PIAXkAYzIo2


!
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Dat yellow spot around stockholm, represent

Maybe it's just me shining some
 


Down to 35mgs of Methadone from being at 105mgs just three months ago. Everyday I wake up in withdrawals and I sleep horribly. When I'm waiting in line to get dosed and have to wait for that little bit of relief I play songs like this and feel extra pathetic, I wanna cry sometimes. It's really bad, lol. Come so far, I have to get off this stuff so I can leave New Jersey and go back up towards New York/Connecticut again. If I don't move away from here it will be much more of a risk that I'll go back on dope. I'll feel better in a hour, tired of this merry-go-round.
 
Good for you, man, I'm proud of you that you're trying to hard to better yourself. <3 Are you planning to get back on suboxone instead? I think that's what you said, right? So that you don't have to do the daily methadone clinic visit?

I hate opiate withdrawal with a fiery passion, but it's definitely worth it, what you're doing.
 
Xorkoth said:
Good for you, man, I'm proud of you that you're trying to hard to better yourself. <3 Are you planning to get back on suboxone instead? I think that's what you said, right? So that you don't have to do the daily methadone clinic visit?

I hate opiate withdrawal with a fiery passion, but it's definitely worth it, what you're doing.
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Might just try and take nothing I'm not really sure. They are gonna make me be on nothing's for 7 days before I would do the transition so I will have to see how I feel. Mean if I am really sick I'm gonna go onto it but it's doable I may just try and take nothing. Still have some time to think about it. Was planning on maybe getting some Memantine to take in low doses as I hear it works very well to combat opioid withdrawal. Maybe if I do that I will be able to power through it. Also gonna get some Phenibut to take once or twice a week when I am really desperate for sleep.
 
izo said:
come to think of it, Al-LAD is really nice. like it better than lsd id have to say.
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I find it substantially more euphoric than LSD, for sure. Really lovely stuff, very humorous and good natured, feels great in the body and mind, very comfortable, lots of smiling and laughing. Quite unique, too. It's a lot like LSD, obviously, but it's definitely not the same drug, it stands on its own as a top-tier psychedelic.

Cosmic Charlie said:
Might just try and take nothing I'm not really sure. They are gonna make me be on nothing's for 7 days before I would do the transition so I will have to see how I feel. Mean if I am really sick I'm gonna go onto it but it's doable I may just try and take nothing. Still have some time to think about it. Was planning on maybe getting some Memantine to take in low doses as I hear it works very well to combat opioid withdrawal. Maybe if I do that I will be able to power through it. Also gonna get some Phenibut to take once or twice a week when I am really desperate for sleep.
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I wish you the best of luck, brother. <3 I always feel so much better in life when I am not on opiates... except for the VERY notable exception of the period of time between getting off and returning to homeostatis, that period is horrible and very difficult to get through. It seems to get harder as I get older. But you seem really motivated and that makes me really happy to see. :)
 
Xorkoth said:
I find it substantially more euphoric than LSD, for sure. Really lovely stuff, very humorous and good natured, feels great in the body and mind, very comfortable, lots of smiling and laughing. Quite unique, too. It's a lot like LSD, obviously, but it's definitely not the same drug, it stands on its own as a top-tier psychedelic.



I wish you the best of luck, brother. <3 I always feel so much better in life when I am not on opiates... except for the VERY notable exception of the period of time between getting off and returning to homeostatis, that period is horrible and very difficult to get through. It seems to get harder as I get older. But you seem really motivated and that makes me really happy to see. :)
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I know that you have been addicted to kratom for some time...
how would you compare it to other opioids/ates?
Because I feel "addicted" to kratom, but not like if it was a serious problem, I barely feel withdrawal if I taper, and it's always kinda easy since I never go up +12gpd, normally just 7-10gpd.
Would you say that you would feel addicted to it if it benefited you in those terms? and you could quit whenever possible? (I say whenever possible because I can only taper when I'm not under too much stress, otherwise I feel inclined to take it, so it's why I feel addicted, but not so much).
 
Well I am currently on suboxone, not kratom, which I switched to because I couldn't stop relapsing on kratom and then I would get trapped there and start relapsing on stronger opioids.

But yeah, me and kratom have a very long and sordid history. I started using it daily in 2003, and after a couple of years I was up to 50-70 grams a day. At my worst I was taking 80-100 grams per day. Withdrawal was very severe at that dosage, I would basically always feel in withdrawal a little bit, and I would get watery eyes and anxiety and restlessness after a few hours after dosing. Eventually after 6 years of this, I moved on to stronger opiates and had 4 more years of that. Then I had 5 years clean after ibogaine.

Then in 2019 I relapsed. Found that I still have permatolerance even after 5 years of not touching an opiate once. I get withdrawals from kratom even after a couple of days in a row, even after a long break. I immediately head back into 3-40 grams per day territory. I also have absurd tolerance to all other opiates I've tried since then.

For me, kratom quickly turns into feeling shitty all the time, but just almost feeling normal when I dose it. It would surely be a different story if I hadn't had 10 years of heavy addiction to it and others to start it off with, and if I could keep it to 7-10 grams per day.

Ultimately, if it improved my life, or if opiates did, I'd be willing to remain on them. But they don't, they make life feel duller, makes me feel bad about myself, make me feel like a slave. I relapsed because of grief/loss and a moment of weakness, and dug myself deep, and it sucks so bad when I try to stop that I haven't been able to do it.
 
Xorkoth said:
But they don't, they make life feel duller, makes me feel bad about myself, make me feel like a slave. I relapsed because of grief/loss and a moment of weakness, and dug myself deep, and it sucks so bad when I try to stop that I haven't been able to do it.
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Yep,
that's something I feel on kratom sometimes, it makes everything duller, in a way I don't like, even if it's soft and not very noticeable, but your soul can notice it enough, that's why I try to be without taking it, weeks or months, from time to time. I don't want to feel a slave of anything. I'm a slave of insulin because of diabetes type 1, that's enough shit to be a slave of big pharma.
 
yeah I would definitely avoid opiate slavery. Shit sucks... it gets worse and worse the longer you do it, too. I didn't even start to think it wasn't worth it until the 5 year mark... another year of that, and trying to stop and being unable to, and I picked up oxy, heroin, morphine, poppy tea... settled on poppy tea (from unwashed poppy seeds) due to the duration and complex nature of opium. Which led to a much worse problem.
 
Xorkoth said:
yeah I would definitely avoid opiate slavery. Shit sucks... it gets worse and worse the longer you do it, too. I didn't even start to think it wasn't worth it until the 5 year mark... another year of that, and trying to stop and being unable to, and I picked up oxy, heroin, morphine, poppy tea... settled on poppy tea (from unwashed poppy seeds) due to the duration and complex nature of opium. Which led to a much worse problem.
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But you know, kratom has real benefits, health benefits, at least in my case, so that's why I use it, I would like to find the same thing without the addictiveness but I couldn't find it yet,
I like kava but it's not stimulating enough nor lower/regulate blood sugar as kratom (which is also a very good immune-modulator).

Fortunately I didn't even think into gettin into real opiates/oids, a member of my family had serious, quite fucked up, heroin addiction so we have that "shade" in our family.
 
I am *so* close to being off of kratom for good, but I have my usual mental block that has been keeping me from just taking the plunge and quitting altogether.

A year ago at this time, I was taking up to 30 rounded/heaping teaspoons of Red Vein Bali a day, which I imagine was something ridiculous like 70g a day.

For the last couple of months, I usually only take 4-6 tsp a day about 12 hours apart. I think that the addiction is 90% mental by now.
 
Isn't kratom also an antipsychotic/antipsychedelic, 5HT2A antagonist?
 
Dreamflyer said:
I am *so* close to being off of kratom for good, but I have my usual mental block that has been keeping me from just taking the plunge and quitting altogether.

A year ago at this time, I was taking up to 30 rounded/heaping teaspoons of Red Vein Bali a day, which I imagine was something ridiculous like 70g a day.

For the last couple of months, I usually only take 4-6 tsp a day about 12 hours apart. I think that the addiction is 90% mental by now.
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I cannot imagine hitting 70gpd, for me 15 is already fucked (non benefitial). Today I took 7.4, feeling all the doses, but yeah, I have tolerance so it only helps some health problems.
For me the "mental threshold" of using it for the sake of it, but being able to cut it to zero or taper fast to zero is - 6gpd, if I hit 5.5 then I know I can quit without problems whenever I want.
 
Dreamflyer said:
I am *so* close to being off of kratom for good, but I have my usual mental block that has been keeping me from just taking the plunge and quitting altogether.

A year ago at this time, I was taking up to 30 rounded/heaping teaspoons of Red Vein Bali a day, which I imagine was something ridiculous like 70g a day.

For the last couple of months, I usually only take 4-6 tsp a day about 12 hours apart. I think that the addiction is 90% mental by now.
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Good work Dreamflyer. Also good work Cosmic Charlie.

I am doing the same Dreamflyer, been on kratom on and off since 2006. I was up to about 50 grams a day two years ago Got down to about 20-25 grams a day spaced out at 10 hours. Spacing is important. I did have one kratom habit two decades ago where I did take some every 4-6 hours and honestly that was the roughest time I had with kratom. Keeping it spaced out is the best way to ease off. But yeah, I need to take the plunge and stop. I want to trip on Ayahuasca again and I won't do that addicted to kratom. Never got a straight answer on MAOI and kratom mixed although some people have done it. I just want off kratom as it has done it's job through the years.
 
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