"Part Of My Past"

[suki_lives]

You are an important part of my past
Please don't forget that
Though we may never speak again
I keep your memory in my heart
Deep inside me there is a shrine
Keeping my love for you alive

Those things you said I did
That tore us apart
Were lies fabricated by your head
My heart was always true
I just couldn't keep battling
Against the storm that raged
Through our last days

Don't ever forget how much I loved you
Please know that I love you still
I still think of you every day
But I could not carry on fighting
The losing battle for your heart

I still imagine scenarios
Where we are reunited by flames of love
Ignited by the natural lust I still feel
Reinforced by the bonds that still bind me
Shards of emotion still cut me like lasers through steel
Begging fate for one last chance
To steal you away from fate's design

Do you ever see me
On those occasions you drive past
I always see you
I'm drawn to run to keep up with you
But I know down inside
That you have moved on
If I started running
I would never catch up
Still though
Every time you pass me
A part of me goes with you

You'll never know the impact you had
The things you taught me
A part of my formative years
You grew me from seedling girl
To blossoming woman
Though it's true I still flourish
I still feel cut down in my prime
Without you

I try not to think about you
Because if I do
I miss you too much
My heart starts to scream for you
I know I can never see you again

If only I could climb up to the sky
Somehow make the stars align
Bring you home to my arms
Take shelter in your fragile heart
Shield you with my hands
Erase all the hurt
We've both been battered on both sides
There's no way back now
If only. IF ONLY!!!!

You'd not be part of my past

But, simply

Part of me, still.

 

[New]

I could almost feel the power of the words drilling into my heart and ripping into my emotions. A well constructed tribute to loss, I must say.

 

[Mehm]

I like how direct and clear this is. Easy to understand is sometimes best. Thank you

 

[suki_lives]

Thank you for your words on this piece. I've not written much in a long time but this was an important piece for me to write.

I am glad you picked up on the directness of it. When I sat down to write it, I was thinking very much of a particular person and what I'd say to them if I had the chance to talk to them face to face. Sadly I can never see this person again as what happened between us was far too painful to be fixed and I'm sure that he has moved on and is happy.

I do hope though, that he may read it on this site, and that he may finally know how much I still care for him. There are some people in your life whose lessons and ideas will stay with you for a lifetime, and to lose their friendship and love is a tragedy.

Thank you again for your replies.