There are lines I drew
in the sand here
so many years ago,
and I just cannot wash
them away.
At least not today.
And I can cross them,
but then I feel the fear,
or I feel the guilt,
or I'm overcome with rage.
I managed to keep it all
at bay today.
And something in me feels the need
to chase the unachievable,
to grow wary when a potential
draws too close in one way
or another.
Maybe it's the result of my
need to be so close against my
need to be so free.
Contradictions swarm
within me.
More than you could
believe.
And sometimes it seems
that the closer I get to someone,
the farther away from myself I drift;
the closer I get to crossing the line...
but only I can
and only I will
and no one can for me
and they're pushing me,
they're tugging me, they say
I'll guide you there,
I'll take you there,
you should, you need...
they said it in a million
ways at work today.
And I say to them, through eyes that bleed:
don't you tell me what I need,
don't you tell me what I want,
don't you tell me what I should,
advise and respect or just
shut the fuck up.
Don't pull me into your rocket ship.
I'm going to reach and
grab this star on my own
but only if I want to,
only if I choose to
and I'm still thinking
if I want to
and if I want to
is not up to you
and if I want to
is none of your fucking
business unless I tell you.
Keep your assumptions
under a microscope
and respect my individuality.
I got my eye within and I
can see what you'll never see
and if you'd stop a moment
and truly listen, truly think and see,
you just might see the lines, might see
how hard things like this are for me.
These are my lines to wash away.
There's billions of stars in the sea to reach for.
A friend said yesterday
not to give into desperation;
a friend wrote me today
said not to give into futility,
and with them, I agree.
I will wash away the lines in time.
I'll ponder over this star and decide
if I'll hop through my wormhole
in reservation
and test her waters
and radiance.
Don't push me.
Don't tug me.
This is my life
and I am free.
Just remember,
I've got my own desires.
I've got my own dreams.
I've got a choice to make
so don't push
just let me be me.
in the sand here
so many years ago,
and I just cannot wash
them away.
At least not today.
And I can cross them,
but then I feel the fear,
or I feel the guilt,
or I'm overcome with rage.
I managed to keep it all
at bay today.
And something in me feels the need
to chase the unachievable,
to grow wary when a potential
draws too close in one way
or another.
Maybe it's the result of my
need to be so close against my
need to be so free.
Contradictions swarm
within me.
More than you could
believe.
And sometimes it seems
that the closer I get to someone,
the farther away from myself I drift;
the closer I get to crossing the line...
but only I can
and only I will
and no one can for me
and they're pushing me,
they're tugging me, they say
I'll guide you there,
I'll take you there,
you should, you need...
they said it in a million
ways at work today.
And I say to them, through eyes that bleed:
don't you tell me what I need,
don't you tell me what I want,
don't you tell me what I should,
advise and respect or just
shut the fuck up.
Don't pull me into your rocket ship.
I'm going to reach and
grab this star on my own
but only if I want to,
only if I choose to
and I'm still thinking
if I want to
and if I want to
is not up to you
and if I want to
is none of your fucking
business unless I tell you.
Keep your assumptions
under a microscope
and respect my individuality.
I got my eye within and I
can see what you'll never see
and if you'd stop a moment
and truly listen, truly think and see,
you just might see the lines, might see
how hard things like this are for me.
These are my lines to wash away.
There's billions of stars in the sea to reach for.
A friend said yesterday
not to give into desperation;
a friend wrote me today
said not to give into futility,
and with them, I agree.
I will wash away the lines in time.
I'll ponder over this star and decide
if I'll hop through my wormhole
in reservation
and test her waters
and radiance.
Don't push me.
Don't tug me.
This is my life
and I am free.
Just remember,
I've got my own desires.
I've got my own dreams.
I've got a choice to make
so don't push
just let me be me.
