ode to a girl

[Shuddr2Think]

you claimed to love her
but its (always been) a lie
i have sat
(silentbroodingseethingenraged)
long enough to see
that your
(sadpatheticdisgusting)
whiskey drunk facade
has become her
(sad sad)

reality

yours is distorted
with every lie painting HER skies grey
how many times are you going
to push her
break her
(when the saddest part is)
all she ever wanted was to walk this life with you

she made it a few miles
until her
(spiritheartlife)
got broken
i remember your wedding
and those words i heard you speak

til death do us part...
(or until she gets the balls to drop you)
move on
gains the strength to see
that love isn't watching you


(((with the barrel of
that
gun
metal cold
in your mouth)))



pretending to try and kill yourself
to keep her
from walking out that door

because
....you ungrateful fuck
you see what happened in this story?

...your anger translated into her shame
...your "problems" her fears

...you broke her will
(and now her face)

because you are too much of a coward
to face the truth.

(your rotten heart
lubricated by old crowe and shame)

is slipping
out of her fingers
and hopefully
(for her sake not yours)

this is the last time.

 

[Dastrix Slogan]

Man that was powerful, some startling images in there - its horrible to watch someone go down the wrong path, especially someone you care for. If it's not fiction, I hope it will be the last time. Loved the formatting!

 

[Doppelganger]

I really enjoyed that, so I read it twice. Your writing has an intense style to it that keeps the reader intrigued.

Great work. Would love to read more of your stuff :D.

 

[Shuddr2Think]

was it something i saw in your eyes?
that lack of life.
that lack of peace.
(too quick to judge i didn't think to see)
(-you-are your own worst enemy)
i never meant to wish you ill.
and i am sorry.

r.i.p.
wtf how the fuck did this happen. like. who the fuck are you to fuckin put us all thru this? like...how COULD you. how?
(sorry. this is like an open ended letter now. i had forgotten i wrote this about you...3 months to the day before you killed yourself.
did you somehow know? did you think i meant it? i just wanted her to be safe, and i think in some fucked up way you must've thought this was the only option. she would never leave you. and you wouldn't leave her. until then. the final straw. your last masterpiece. they saw it you know? they didn't believe you were gone. and sometimes they still don't. you were a fuckin dick, but i still loved you.

FUCK.

this is getting deleted tomorrow.
so fuck it. get it out now.

i am sorry.
i miss you.
you were too young,
and i wish we would've taken you serious.

but its too late now.

you were too good for what you had become.
you can see it in that last picture from the week before.
your eyes are cold.
colder than i have ever seen.


did you know then?
was it already loaded?
how long had you been planning this?

why do i care.


because i am left here to pick up the pieces. I AM LEFT HERE TO HELP.
and i am falling apart.

 

[up all night]

I've followed your posts in Words for years now and this place really misses them. This was really intense - but then what you write often is. I hope you post some more.

 

[(Wordy)]

Definitely very intense...

this is getting deleted tomorrow.
so fuck it. get it out now.

I love these lines, and just the sheer fact that you've included them (and that this piece wasn't deleted!). I can just imagine that thought going through the mind while writing something like this. They say so much, and really frame the whole thing. Thoughts in the eye of the storm...