Octsober!!

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I'm in! I'm drinking a lot less than I used to but I like the idea of being totally sober for a while. This is the first time in years I feel like I can do it, too. :)

I'm sure I'll slip up occasionally - particularly considering I have a wedding and a few birthdays coming up - but I'm going to try really hard to have NO alcohol at home, or on any nights where I'm not out at a social event.
 
Last day of September, I want to do this. I need to do this.

I'm afraid that if I commit and then relapse, I'm going to go into a cycle of self loathing and just get fucking wrecked again.

I did Dry July successfully, then got completely demolished in August, and then "Can't Remember September". It's just that the rebounds seem harder and bigger every time I do these things.

You know what, fuck you cocaine. I'm gonna go on a holiday for while. Maybe we'll catch up in a month or two.

Sign me up.
 
Count me in for Octsober.

I'm finally going to that detox appointment today that I've rescheduled three times already. My DOC for the last six years has been cocaine. Started off as a weekend party thing and gradually progressed to daily use. My longest break from the stuff was 7 months two years ago. Last December I started doing a bit of heroin to complement the coke (how stupid was that 8) ) and now I'm dangerously close to a physical junk addiction. I don't really enjoy coke on its own anymore and that is definitely not good. I want to put a stop to this shit before I slide in even deeper. Getting high and living only to get high is getting old. I want to live a real life for a change and learn how to experience joy again instead of riding this endless pleasure/pain rollercoaster.
 
^^ It's so good to have you on board j-bird and DC <3

DC, go to your detox appointment, and get on board the sober train man <3

j-bird, I know exactly what you mean about having the rebound binges. But hopefully the more solid attempts you give to sobriety, the more your brain and body will get used to the concept of being clean and sober.

Let's do this thing %)

<3
 
My trip to Germany has been officially canx! So my level of effort has immediately increased, as well as my expectations for Octsober. Like I said over in the alcohol thread...I start today.

Best of luck everyone we can do this!
 
^Yes we can! I was thinking of putting together some signs with affirmations I can put up on my refrigerator and next to my desk.

I couldn't talk my dad into doing it with us, but I did have a conversation with him about how, if I am going to associate with him and the family, NO ONE is to offer me any alcohol, even jokingly. n3o, perhaps you could do something similar?

Trancegirle - I am SO GLAD you are in. <3 Likewise with all of you.

Redleader, nice work on your head start! Do you like the scent of lavender? I got a little sick of it for awhile but now I dab a bit of essential oil on before bed.

To those who are supplementing with l-glutamine: what is the dose you are taking?
 
j-bird, I know exactly what you mean about having the rebound binges. But hopefully the more solid attempts you give to sobriety, the more your brain and body will get used to the concept of being clean and sober.

I find this to be true, generally. Just try not to put too much pressure on yourself - look at any day you remain sober as a bonus. :)
 
I take 5mg l-glutamine twice daily. Though I take it for fitness purposes, so I might be taking more than would be required for one using it to sooth a stomach.

You mean 5 grams b.i.d, right??

I take 2 grams twice daily = 4 grams a day.

Mariposa, yes I do believe I am going to have to tell my family to not offer me drinks, period. A very wise suggestion :) <3
 
Oh ya, 5g twice daily, not mg. Rarely do you use grams on this website :)

I go by the .01g/kg rule. Though this puts me only around 7g, but I have 5g capsules. There's nothing very dangerous about taking a bit too much of it, other than some people reporting nausea. I don't get that. Works great for muscle recovery.
 
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^^ And for cognitive function too, I find.
It can definitely help me feel more clear-headed and focussed.
 
good luck everyone. heres some things im going to try and do instead of trying to get spun every night...

work out
eat alot
cook alot
go to concerts/parties (STS9 on the 23rd!)
walk in central park (its FALL!!!)
play pool
work more (booooo)
get laid
 
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Well, I discovered some setbacks which made me reconsider whether I could take part in Octsober after all, but I decided in the end that it was worth it provided that I changed my plans a little. They hinge around the fact that I have been scheduled for a relatively small back operation on Monday (October 5th). I am keen to go ahead with this as it will help in the medium-to-long term but for a couple of weeks the post-op pain will probably be worse than what I currently have. However "small" it may be spinal surgery isn't gonna be painless! The 2changes this brings about are:

1) My first rule, "No drugs that I have abused" may have to be amended to allow me to take opiate painkillers for the post-op pain. I am gonna try using NSAIDs alone in the first instance, and have got my doctor to prescribe me Omeprazole at a higher daily dose to protect my stomach so that I can take these again for the first time in almost a year. If I'm in lots of pain though I will resort to opiates to make myself comfortable. The sub-rules are:
a) Only therapeutic, not recreational doses of opiates and only if really needed.
b) True opiates and NSAIDs for the pain, no tramadol (which I am one of those rare people who really love this drug way too much and get hooked on it real easy and then have a nightmare whenever they have to come off. I quit it for good and I mean to keep it that way. I have invented a whole profile of "side-effects" which will give me a legitimate reason to refuse it without mentioning the side effect that it gets me higher than a kite.

2) I really wanted to include tobacco among "drugs of abuse", screw up my best willpower and kick off an attempt to quit smoking for good by keeping off it for the month. I had a few appointments booked throughout October with my counsellor, but the 1st one is on the 7th (wednesday) which is only the day after I am due to be discharged from the hospital so I seriously doubt that I'll have the mobility to go to it. Without my counsellor's help I'm realistic enough to realise that I won't be able to go the whole month without a smoke so I've cancelled the appointments to allow them to be given to someone else and asked her to call me in a month. I'll just have to wait until November to quit smoking :( Never mind, if I'm successful with the remainder of Octsober it might give me the inspiration I need to quit smoking, too. Trouble is, I know that if I include tobacco (with which I'm 85% certain I'd fail to quit entirely) among those things I have to completely stop using then when I cave in and smoke I'll get really disillusioned with the whole effort and probably give in to other temptations too (at least I'm honest about it). Better I think to allow myself a smoke from time to time and include everything else in the quittage attempt. Instead of totally quitting smoking then I have resolved to simply cut down as much as possible to make it easier to give up when I can go back to the counsellor.

I wish everyone luck, I'm glad i came to a decision in time to be a part of this :)
 
^Good for you for making detailed plans in advance. I am also one of the select club who has that side effect from tramadol, and I take it off-label for depression. I have to leave out that side effect when I'm asked by the doc how it's working. I do not generally abuse it and 50 mg gives me profound mood-elevating effects. It gives my partner only SSRI-like negative side effects. Some of us respond to that elusive M1, others just don't... good for you for sticking to quitting.

I am continuing to take it through Octsober along with benzodiazepines and Soma as needed.

Good luck with your surgery. If you have a need for opiates, for therapeutic purposes, my own of choice is Vicoprofen rather than Vicodin because I have not put APAP into my body for years due to my alcoholism.

Class got cancelled today so I am catching up on other stuff and drinking... fizzy mineral water! No cravings yet. First test will be this weekend. I have a "free pass" for a couple drinks Saturday but that is IT so I don't accidentally kindle, and I may be at an event that is alcohol-incompatible, so we shall see. My mood and appetite are fine, no cravings, it's a decent start so far.
 
I'm in, still thinking about Halloween, but I doubt by the time I get there I will want to drink.

DOC: Alcohol, used almost everything under the sun, but Alcohol is the one. I can take and leave anything else at this point.

I may be a few days late, I'm having one piddly drink tonight as part of my taper. I will most likely use cannabis for a few days but I will stop that. Will also use Kava as needed but I always end up phasing that out on its own. Goal is to be totally sober eventually. Want to have all cannabis (and alcohol) cut out by Friday of next week.

I'm actually looking at December 5th as my final day, may make an exception for Halloween and Thanksgiving but thats it. Like many other drinkers the majority of my family drinks. I remember being shocked when a friends dad told me he didn't drink. I didn't know any adults that didn't lol!

This upcoming Friday through Sunday will be the worst of it. I am very very committed to doing this. I have several reasons to do it, the chief one being that I'm taking the LSAT on December 5th (most likely) and really need to study hard. I drink only after work but need this time to study. I cannot have that time If I am concerned with drinking after 5:00. I have been tapering since sunday and today is the last day I have anything.

Plan is to really work out and exercise. Plus watch films and whatnot. I have been walking every day in preparation. Last year around this time I was really built, wasn't smoking cigarettes and only drinking a few beers. I do plan on cutting out the cigs but will allow myself some during the first few days.
 
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