motherofearth
Bluelighter
I neglected reading all the responses, so I apologize if I repeat others' statements.
Firstly, yes, pot is a psychoactive substance, meaning it will change the way you think and interact. It is also capable of causing withdrawals, psychological and physical.
Second, I can relate to the gruesomeness you experienced w/ hallucinogens. I'd try to compartmentalize the "evil" associated w/ the acid and not let it reign in your day-to-day life, whether it was divine intervention or no. Although, if I'm allowed to get analytical a moment, I'd chalk it up to all the shame, guilt, and/or fear you are feeling over your drug use. From reading your post, it looks like this was going on before your revelatory acid trip.
Which brings me to my next point: every drug relationship you described sounded very noxious. This isn't to be mean, but perhaps your personality isn't suited for this stuff. I don't think ecstasy, LSD, and marijuana help anyone - in the neurological sense - but you may be more sensitive to these substances. I know that became my problem over time w/ psilocybin. In any case, a break would be a good idea. Especially since you are worried about something like schizophrenia - and I've never heard of drugs inducing schizophrenia, or even prompting it in genetically predisposed individuals - so, good news?
I don't know about all this esotericism, but I'd be leery when it comes to documentaries with hard core religious agendas - Like, don't get carried away until maybe you clear your head (sorry, you probably have more sense than that, you seem critical and intelligent). But yeah, if you have a church, or whatever, maybe seek spiritual counseling. The CBT is a good idea, but some visits to a therapist might help you sift out how you really feel about drugs.
Good luck and best wishes
Firstly, yes, pot is a psychoactive substance, meaning it will change the way you think and interact. It is also capable of causing withdrawals, psychological and physical.
Second, I can relate to the gruesomeness you experienced w/ hallucinogens. I'd try to compartmentalize the "evil" associated w/ the acid and not let it reign in your day-to-day life, whether it was divine intervention or no. Although, if I'm allowed to get analytical a moment, I'd chalk it up to all the shame, guilt, and/or fear you are feeling over your drug use. From reading your post, it looks like this was going on before your revelatory acid trip.
Which brings me to my next point: every drug relationship you described sounded very noxious. This isn't to be mean, but perhaps your personality isn't suited for this stuff. I don't think ecstasy, LSD, and marijuana help anyone - in the neurological sense - but you may be more sensitive to these substances. I know that became my problem over time w/ psilocybin. In any case, a break would be a good idea. Especially since you are worried about something like schizophrenia - and I've never heard of drugs inducing schizophrenia, or even prompting it in genetically predisposed individuals - so, good news?
I don't know about all this esotericism, but I'd be leery when it comes to documentaries with hard core religious agendas - Like, don't get carried away until maybe you clear your head (sorry, you probably have more sense than that, you seem critical and intelligent). But yeah, if you have a church, or whatever, maybe seek spiritual counseling. The CBT is a good idea, but some visits to a therapist might help you sift out how you really feel about drugs.
Good luck and best wishes
