• S E X
    L O V E +
    R E L A T I O N S H I P S


    ❤️ Welcome Guest! ❤️


    Posting Guidelines Bluelight Rules
  • SLR Moderators: Senior Staff

Obsessions with thinking they are the one?

M

Markomarkh

Bluelighter
Joined
Jan 18, 2013
Messages
510
Hi all, I'm 35 male, i get obsessed with certain ladies on Facebook and look at their photos, thinking are they the one, sometimes I feel despair or emotionally sick, I've had hardly any success with women, I got rejected a lot at school by girls, always ended up in trouble with ones I was with and only lasted a month, I got no confidence, no job, no self of steam, daren't go out to meet women. All I ever wanted was love. Something wrong or unnatural about modern society works. I mean caveman had it easy, they didn't need dating sites, Facebook, match.com or tech to find a date.
 
you need a job to provide for yourself a standard of living. your own well being needs to get better first, simply because when people are happier it attracts others to them.

think about it- its hard to go on dates when you have no money. so get working on a job for now. school was ages ago so forget those times and issues and focus on making the present better, sort your situation out financially and you'll get more freedom and opportunities to stimulate your mind.
 
Charm, self esteem, confidence, style, class, all these things one doesnt get from others but from themselves. instead of going boo hoo on the internet. work out, focus on eating healthy, approach random women, GET a job seriously when all else fails u can bithc about work, might find friends etc.

get mad for being so down on urself, u just like everyone else are 99.8 percent the same. Go out and be fabulous. I did these things and guess what i started rejecting girls instead of clinging to any attention, started meeting tons of new women and friends. met my dream girl. and yea life has done a 180. i used to bitch annd moan on this site awhile back just 2 or 3 years ago to be exact. other users can attest to this. and once i re found WHO I WAS as a person and didnt like it and became a better self. my life has flourished phsyically and mentally, its never too late bro. and only u can do this on ur own.
 
Markomarkh said:
I mean caveman had it easy, they didn't need dating sites, Facebook, match.com or tech to find a date.
Click to expand...

They also lived to be about 30, died from preventable diseases and got mauled to death by sabertooth tigers. Seriously tho op, you don't NEED technology to find a date but you might want to focus on improving yourself first.
 
soul mate said:
I think I've met "the one", however it is not an obsession. It's more of an instinctive feeling I get when I'm with her.
Click to expand...


hmm its not the one, just a real deep feeling of love. i've had that shit with more than one person and it always feels like they are "the one" but ultimately its a social construct of a monogamous society

they could become the person that you end up with but your only option? there is always more unless you are 90 and cannot walk or leave the house
 
She is everything I have dreamed of in a female. I've even taken up the belief that marriage is a viable option, whereas I would never have thought that before. It is a life-changing partnership we have. I want her to know, and have been showing her, how much she means to me. I cannot see a world where I don't have her by my side, she is simply "heavenly", and I am so happy to have that and feel this way. :)
 
Hey OP
Don't narrow your choices man. There are (roughly) 6 billion people on earth. At a (roughly again) 50/50 male/female split. So....the chances are that Suzie Homecoming on Facebook is "the one" are 1/3billion? Nah man. There's more than one person for everyone. Don't limit your options focusing too hard on one chick. Like the other posters recommended, get a job, improve your station a little. With that your confidence will improve. Talk to women you don't know any chance you get: at the coffee shop, grocery store, mall gas station, wherever. Don't creep them out or ask them out. Don't get heavy. Just practice small talking. The weather. Try out a few jokes. Watch the news and stay informed so you can bring something up. Practice. You'll do fine. Good luck.
 
you can't fall in love with a picture! try at least messaging some girls on facebook. or strike up a conversation with a cute waitress or cashier. doesn't have to be flirty, just casual conversation is a good start. 'how's your day?' and genuinely try to listen and care about what she says. baby steps are crucial. just keep putting yourself out there, and the right girl will notice you. and usually(from personal experience) as soon as you stop looking, one comes.
 
MarkOmarkh
I've said if before and i'll say it again. F_ fb. and like minded sites of social darwinistic BS
Your right when you said it is un natural; it truly is.

Sitting behind your computer screen staring at pics with the notion that you'll get to know who these people truly are is crazy.
Face Time, in person is what you need. Buy a bike, start mountain climbing, go to the library, get out there and meet people and in the process find yourself a happier you.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top