I can tell you from my own personal experience of using recreational doses of dextromethorphan for the better part of a year at least 2nd plateau 3-5 times a week (sometimes tripping every day, even doing plateau sigmas to continuously trip over 12 hours) I never developed a significant tolerance to DXM. I quit cold turkey and had no withdrawals other than a psychological desire to robo trip and I remained off the DXM for ... at least 3 years. When I tried it again, I found that it had no recreational effects on me however it still worked for reducing tolerance to Valium when I took 60mg of Delsym twice a day for a week or so - it was more effective than memantine, in fact, and the reason I stopped it and waited for my memantine was because of a hypertensive reaction when I took 31.2mg of 4-HO-MET while on my 60mg Delsym dose.
Ketamine ... my tolerance to that went up and never came back down.
Based on my extreme abuse of DXM and no noticeable tolerance developing to its psychoactive effects and no issues discontinuing it when I decided to quit, I would say that developing tolerance to the much lower doses used for NMDA antagonism (usually 30-60mg twice a day in the case of Delsym) is unlikely. Memantine I can't be too sure but since its receptor profile is so clean compared to DXM, I imagine there won't be a discontinuation syndrome unless you were using it to quit something like GABAergics - in this case, I imagine that quitting memantine abruptly after discontinuation of high dose benzos or something would be contraindicated since NMDA would quickly up-regulate as the memantine was eliminated and if GABA wasn't given sufficient time to recover from the benzo effects then there may be some big problems.
I don't know for sure though as far as the benzos go but considering how long it generally takes the brain to heal from benzo discontinuation, I would recommend staying on NMDA antagonists for at least 2 months after discontinuation to make sure that withdrawals don't start. It would massively suck to go into a grand mal seizure about a week after stopping memantine (it has a long half-life) so I won't be the guinea pig on this one. I plan to stay on NMDA antagonists for at least 4-6 months after I get off of my valium and I plan to taper off of the NMDA antagonists as well, albeit quicker than my benzo taper will be.