New user - unique story - long thread please give it read

[EagleM]

Hi guys
So im really new here and have browsed this site before
Little bit about me - never used recreational drugs before. A while ago i was extremely ill and was in hospital for 5 months and wasnt expected to live - i was put on strong pain medication - with an increasing dose that began with slow release morphine 20mg - to 10 mg IV morphine every 2 -4 hours daily to having a 72 hour 75mcg/hour Fentanyl patch as well as three 400mcg instant release Fentantyl Lozenges

Thanks to this site i realised this was a lot! Needless to say my tolerance i believe is extremely high - i actually withdrew from Fentanyl myself as my doctors will pretty much prescribe me anything these days - i made a miracle recovery from health issues yet am left with this tolerance and addiction - currently this takes the form of Oxycodone - in the form of Oxynorm 5mg/5ml liquid (i get through 500ml per week ) and also prescribed 56x5mg oxycontin CR tabs which i crush up and swallow at varying amounts

I work a professional job - and surprisingly even though Morphine - in IM form - tablet form or liquid form (oramorph) doesnt give me highs - yet oxycodone still consistently gives me that "buzz" despite my tolerance to others being so high.

Basically im looking for help - i dont judge - i respect the knowledge from any and all who are willing to provide it. I may not have the "standard" background story in Rec drugs but i worry about the long term effects - dosage limitations - also really someone who i can speak about my experience who understands it. My drug habits were known by my family and friends and work - and doctor - and ecouraged due to my situation yet the minute i started to recover from my health issues it was like my drug habit should disappear too - like its easy.

Sorry for long thread - i hope i adhered to rules please im genuine here and after some connections

Thankyou everyone

 

[CFC]

Hi EagleM, welcome to BL.

Thanks for sharing your story. It sounds like you are very fortunate to even be alive, so consider that a massive achievement in and of itself!!

You might be surprised but many people here haven't really come via the 'standard' story of recreational drug use - there's often a myriad of surprising reasons. So I can assure you you're not alone, and shouldn't feel like you're experiences don't count - I suspect you have a great deal of widom to impart as well as learn.

I hope you find the resources and support you're looking for here at BL. There are loads of helpful mods and posters with a wealth of harm reduction knowledge ready to be tapped. So just start posting and together I'm sure you'll eventually be able to overcome your residual drug habit.

Best of luck!
CFC

 

[EagleM]

Thanks for the reply
Yeah hopefully - still experiencing a lot of new things so nice to connect with many people with different experiences

 

[BumbleBee33]

I am also a professional, yet I hav terrible track marks and if anyone I worked with found out, I would be fired and forced to go through a long expensive treatment process in order to remain in my line of work.
You see it started with supplements from GNC and such.....
I'm an addict from way back. Got hooked on meth for the first when I was 14....clean by 16, worked hard to graduate with my class after missing 1 & 1/2 yrs. And did it.... Been to rehab 4 times.... I'm 38 now and inject meth everyday. I love the high and I don't allow myself while say, at work, around my mom (ex-addict) or any other important.
I so justify my using. My husband knows, and even told his sister (the way fucked up junkie that now has over 18 mos clean. ( big part due to my support ).
I thought I would feel more shameful..... But no, I just continue to use....