Hey guys, I am here to share my recovery story from MDMA abuse as well as other drugs, Follow my older post to get an idea of what I did before I quit drugs. I have stopped taking MDMA and other drugs on the 15th of November which was 2 and a half of months ago. the week after quitting drugs, I felt very empty and very demotivated, everything felt unreal, and no matter how hard I tried I couldn't motivate myself to do anything. I went to the GP and told him everything including my drug use, and he told me that its all worry and I should go back to him if symptoms persisted for more than 2 months. The 2nd week after quitting, I quite smoking cigarettes which made me feel even more stressful than before. I started to go the gym in order to relive stress and eat more to make sure I am getting good nutrition. needless to say, no matter what I did, I couldn't escape from the thought of uncertainty, everything felt uncertain, my thoughts, my ideas, my way of living, the way I talk, I felt like I was ganna lose my mind at any second, and I was thinking fast and non-step in my head and I couldn't shake it off and stop from thinking. I was basically consistently worrying. The 3rd week, my condition got worst and for the first time in my life I had a panic/anxiety attack where I worried too much and had this horrible feeling in my chest and uncontrollable thoughts crossing my mind, I couldn't stop from thinking and my thoughts were so random and scary, it really felt like i lost my mind... 4th week was the worst by far where exam pressure ate me alive, stressing everyday and constantly worrying, and i went into deep depression constantly crying everyday and asking god what have i done to deserve this, it was mental torture, by far the worst kind of pain i have experienced in my life and i would wish it on nobody, not even my worst enemies. the recovery started at week 5 where i tried my best to put myself into a positive mental frame and made sure to ignore worrying thoughts such as exams and self-diagnostic thoughts (that's a story by itself). I got better, I still had panic attacks but they were much milder, less horrible feeling and better mind state, at Week 6 i felt much better and i was convinced i was getting out of that phase of withdrawal/comedown, week 7, I no more had anxiety or panic attacks, just mild worry, week 8, 9, and 10 my social life is restored, feeling much more confident, ego is back, i felt like i am back, propably 98%, and i know with time worry would get less even though its negligible now. Sorry for bad English, am writing this in a rush. anyways i just want to tell anyone out there who feels what i went through is that its just a temporary phase and with time you will heal, because when I was in your position i felt so alone, and just wanted confirmation from anyone that i was normal, so i desperately turned to anyone i could, family, god, online forums, anyone.... I just want to tell you, you're not alone and believe me you will eventually get out of whatever state your in, it might take some time, a month, 2, 3 or even a year but eventually your serotonin levels will go back to normal and your mood will get better, just make sure not to overdo drugs, cause sometimes we do stupid things in the heat of the action... anyways stay strong and hang in there and turn to a member of ur family that u really trust and tell him/her everything you went through, he would defintely try to help and support u all the way, or even a friend but from my experience, its rare to find a friend that will support u through whatever ur going through cause no one really cares or have the time to check up on u everyday. if u want to know any other information of my recovery or anything, just ask am more than willing to help :D
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My Recovery Story
- Thread starter jimbean
- Start date
Thanks for the post. Was your libido affected at all? Like someone else posted looking at a hot girl is like looking at a tree for me right now. I would usually look for refuge from my problems in woman but even that ability is diminished right now.
Not really, I didn't have any problems with erectile dysfunction. I was too worried about myself and didn't really care about anything else.
badrobot114
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Sep 30, 2013
- Messages
- 266
I'm sorry I have to say this quite blatantly and I don't mean to belittle your struggle or dismiss what you've been through - get a damn grip man.
This isn't directed specifically at you, it's just that I see a general trend around here for people who didn't go through anything remotely similar to a "long term comedown" to claim they have.
I'm very sorry, but going out of a period of using drugs and rebounding while your brain reverts to its natural homestasis isn't a long term comedown or MDMA damage. It just means that your brain had to adapt to a new chemical state(e.g. going from a drug-using state which means irregular sensitivity at various receptor sites in response to drug stimuli, possible catecholaminergic imbalance and so forth back to your natural configuration) and that process naturally had various effects on you.
With all due respect, do you even know what a true panic attack is? I can tell it's much, much worse than simple racing thoughts, worrying too much and uncomfortable feelings in your chest. Try imagining an -uncontrollable- stream of paranoid and irrational thoughts, coupled with horrible arrythmia/hypertension/palpitations and the absolute conviction you're gonna be dead any moment now. No my friend, what you had is called simple anxiety at most and more than likely an acute psychological symptom of withdrawal(a short way of saying homestatic changes in the brain).
Have you read any of the long term comedown threads around here? people become suicidal, suffer from insomnia, loss any sort of interest in life or ability to experience positive(or otherwise) emotions, become agorophobic etc... and this isn't even talking about the physical side effects(the notorious "brain zaps" for example). They certainly aren't just going through subtle cognitive adjustments from going clean while concurrently going through mid terms.
Lastly, notice how you got better after only 4 weeks. True long term comedowns from MDMA go on for months and sometimes years(hence the name, "long term comedown"). Your doctor was right to ask you to return again if your symptoms don't resolve in two months - going through a bit of a cognitive rough patch from drug withdrawals is normal and you're lucky you went to an intelligent doctor who understands this and not one who could have labeled you with some made up drug-induced disorder and put you on potentially harmful medication for no reason at all.
Again, i'm sorry if this came across a bit harsh, this isn't my intention at all. You should feel very relieved you didn't go through months of agonizing real MDMA clusterfuckage with potential side effects persisting for god knows how long. Unfortunately the recent comedown trend has lost all proportions and people experiencing mild withdrawals/longer hangover periods suddenly start melodramatic comedown threads for no reason. This spreads unnecessary panic due to grossly overblowing the prevalence of the phenomena while simultaneously downplaying the severity of the symptoms.
It's very important to keep everything in perspective people, not every drawn out hangover is MDMA damage.
On a final note, i'm glad to hear you've bounced back and hope your exams went well. Stay safe friend
This isn't directed specifically at you, it's just that I see a general trend around here for people who didn't go through anything remotely similar to a "long term comedown" to claim they have.
I'm very sorry, but going out of a period of using drugs and rebounding while your brain reverts to its natural homestasis isn't a long term comedown or MDMA damage. It just means that your brain had to adapt to a new chemical state(e.g. going from a drug-using state which means irregular sensitivity at various receptor sites in response to drug stimuli, possible catecholaminergic imbalance and so forth back to your natural configuration) and that process naturally had various effects on you.
With all due respect, do you even know what a true panic attack is? I can tell it's much, much worse than simple racing thoughts, worrying too much and uncomfortable feelings in your chest. Try imagining an -uncontrollable- stream of paranoid and irrational thoughts, coupled with horrible arrythmia/hypertension/palpitations and the absolute conviction you're gonna be dead any moment now. No my friend, what you had is called simple anxiety at most and more than likely an acute psychological symptom of withdrawal(a short way of saying homestatic changes in the brain).
Have you read any of the long term comedown threads around here? people become suicidal, suffer from insomnia, loss any sort of interest in life or ability to experience positive(or otherwise) emotions, become agorophobic etc... and this isn't even talking about the physical side effects(the notorious "brain zaps" for example). They certainly aren't just going through subtle cognitive adjustments from going clean while concurrently going through mid terms.
Lastly, notice how you got better after only 4 weeks. True long term comedowns from MDMA go on for months and sometimes years(hence the name, "long term comedown"). Your doctor was right to ask you to return again if your symptoms don't resolve in two months - going through a bit of a cognitive rough patch from drug withdrawals is normal and you're lucky you went to an intelligent doctor who understands this and not one who could have labeled you with some made up drug-induced disorder and put you on potentially harmful medication for no reason at all.
Again, i'm sorry if this came across a bit harsh, this isn't my intention at all. You should feel very relieved you didn't go through months of agonizing real MDMA clusterfuckage with potential side effects persisting for god knows how long. Unfortunately the recent comedown trend has lost all proportions and people experiencing mild withdrawals/longer hangover periods suddenly start melodramatic comedown threads for no reason. This spreads unnecessary panic due to grossly overblowing the prevalence of the phenomena while simultaneously downplaying the severity of the symptoms.
It's very important to keep everything in perspective people, not every drawn out hangover is MDMA damage.
On a final note, i'm glad to hear you've bounced back and hope your exams went well. Stay safe friend
I'm sorry I have to say this quite blatantly and I don't mean to belittle your struggle or dismiss what you've been through - get a damn grip man.
This isn't directed specifically at you, it's just that I see a general trend around here for people who didn't go through anything remotely similar to a "long term comedown" to claim they have.
I'm very sorry, but going out of a period of using drugs and rebounding while your brain reverts to its natural homestasis isn't a long term comedown or MDMA damage. It just means that your brain had to adapt to a new chemical state(e.g. going from a drug-using state which means irregular sensitivity at various receptor sites in response to drug stimuli, possible catecholaminergic imbalance and so forth back to your natural configuration) and that process naturally had various effects on you.
With all due respect, do you even know what a true panic attack is? I can tell it's much, much worse than simple racing thoughts, worrying too much and uncomfortable feelings in your chest. Try imagining an -uncontrollable- stream of paranoid and irrational thoughts, coupled with horrible arrythmia/hypertension/palpitations and the absolute conviction you're gonna be dead any moment now. No my friend, what you had is called simple anxiety at most and more than likely an acute psychological symptom of withdrawal(a short way of saying homestatic changes in the brain).
Have you read any of the long term comedown threads around here? people become suicidal, suffer from insomnia, loss any sort of interest in life or ability to experience positive(or otherwise) emotions, become agorophobic etc... and this isn't even talking about the physical side effects(the notorious "brain zaps" for example). They certainly aren't just going through subtle cognitive adjustments from going clean while concurrently going through mid terms.
Lastly, notice how you got better after only 4 weeks. True long term comedowns from MDMA go on for months and sometimes years(hence the name, "long term comedown"). Your doctor was right to ask you to return again if your symptoms don't resolve in two months - going through a bit of a cognitive rough patch from drug withdrawals is normal and you're lucky you went to an intelligent doctor who understands this and not one who could have labeled you with some made up drug-induced disorder and put you on potentially harmful medication for no reason at all.
Again, i'm sorry if this came across a bit harsh, this isn't my intention at all. You should feel very relieved you didn't go through months of agonizing real MDMA clusterfuckage with potential side effects persisting for god knows how long. Unfortunately the recent comedown trend has lost all proportions and people experiencing mild withdrawals/longer hangover periods suddenly start melodramatic comedown threads for no reason. This spreads unnecessary panic due to grossly overblowing the prevalence of the phenomena while simultaneously downplaying the severity of the symptoms.
It's very important to keep everything in perspective people, not every drawn out hangover is MDMA damage.
On a final note, i'm glad to hear you've bounced back and hope your exams went well. Stay safe friend
You don't know what I have went through to say all that. Even though, other users had much worse comedowns after years of MDMA abuse, it doesn't mean what I went through was nothing, and for you to tell me get a grip.... that is very ignorant of you. Just because I wasn't in a worse state as other people, it doesn't mean I was weak and I could've easily neglected all the worry and continued my life. I wrote this post in attempt to give hope to those who are in a comedown phase and looking to get out of it. Many people who recover don't even bother posting their recovery, they only post their horrible side-effects when they are in it !!
ScaredFirstTimer
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Dec 15, 2013
- Messages
- 317
Thank you jimbean! Really...!
I'm pretty sure I have a "shorter" one myself. I'm probably gonna feel pretty good at around the 3-4 month mark, as if that isn't long enough. During this I've experienced the worst pain I ever have in my entire life, so I definitely know what you are talking about. I've felt, and still feel on "bad" days, very alone and a little scared still. Reading your post made me feel better ty
I'm pretty sure I have a "shorter" one myself. I'm probably gonna feel pretty good at around the 3-4 month mark, as if that isn't long enough. During this I've experienced the worst pain I ever have in my entire life, so I definitely know what you are talking about. I've felt, and still feel on "bad" days, very alone and a little scared still. Reading your post made me feel better
ty