kleinerkiffer
Bluelight Crew
-Alcohol is a never ending pursuit of happiness-
Mumbling to himself: “Another one won’t hurt” Michael drinks his seventh shot of vodka. He supposes to find happiness in one of the next few shots, at the latest when he reaches the bottom of the bottle. Preparing his eighth shot, he grins harebrained. The alcohol makes him feeling numb and careless in a way, but he has yet to find the sought-after happiness. Drinking his eighth shot, Michael fights his gag reflex. His last main dish dates back a few hours, but it feels like ages. He can feel the warmth of the alcohol moving all the way down his gullet, reaching his stomach. The warmth spreads through his whole body, leaving a sweet and welcomed numbness. Sipping on a beer, Michael starts to think about his life. Between one third and two thirds of a bottle of vodka he gets reflective and depressed by thinking about his past fuck-ups and all the problems he tries to booze away. However, he knows that happiness is just a few shots away, but he has yet to find it.
Finishing another shot he thinks about his last mistakes. He still berates himself to the point of self-loathing for letting his first big love slip away. And now another girlfriend left him because of the same mistake he made before. Wallowing in self-pity he downs another shot. The taste of pure vodka gets better and better after every other shot he takes. The numbness slowly takes over his self-pitying as he reaches the two-third mark. He cares less and less about his mistakes, but he has yet to find happiness.
As he stands up, the world starts to spin around him, but he couldn’t care less. Michael stumbles to the toilet while crack-opening another beer. After having the piss of his life, he falls in a kind of manic state of mind, so he starts to dance through his chamber, bawling to the music from the radio. Michael increases the volume and dances even more idiotically. Downing another shot of vodka, it feels like he is drinking water. He successfully benumbed his sense of taste. Drinking beer like a drowning fish he realizes that the world is spinning faster and faster, but he has yet to find the sought-after happiness.
But the end is in sight; he could feel that the happiness was just a few shots away. Looking at the bottle, he realizes that he got three, maybe four more shots until finishing the vodka. Deep down he knows that he wouldn’t achieve the sought-after happiness by drinking the remaining shots, but, in an attack of obstinacy to the latter, Michael grabs the nearly empty bottle of vodka and drinks the rest, successfully fighting the urge to gag. “That’s it, happiness you can come” he babbles to himself while waiting for the happiness to come, but he has yet to find it.
Sipping on his third beer he waits and waits, but nothing happens. He feels numb and gives no fuck about anything, but he does not feel happy. Slowly Michael realizes that he won’t achieve happiness by sitting in his chamber, lonely and depressed, drinking as much alcohol as he can. Another manic episode gets a hold of him and he thinks about a way to let people learn from his mistake. While slowly sliding off his chair, Michael starts to write down: “-Alcohol is a never ending pursuit of happiness-“before finally passing out. But he has yet to find the sought-after happiness.
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