First Time Shroom Horror Experience!!!!
PLease excuse misspellings and long report.
Me: 31 yrs old,professional. Very analytical and busy mind. A little worried type of person that does over react sometimes. Some insecurities about relationships,what people think of me and how I do things.Although basically a "good guy" I am fascinated with bad behavior and people who misbehave. Weekend drinker only once to the point of puking.Do get impatient when I shouldn't. Smoked pot a half a dozen times. Done E three times (which I prefer and will stick with because so far it's the best I've comeacross). No existing medical condition.No meds.
Pre-Disposition: Think finding yourself through drugs is bull. Talking to God or higher being on drugs is bull and you can controll your trip entirely.
Setting: Vegas Baby!Was and still is my favorite party city.(first mistake for 1st time shroomer)My birthday. Hotel room waiting for my friends pals to get in to town. Guys weekend>
People: A guy I had known for about a year and 4 of his out of town friends.(second mistake..always do it with people you know and who are doing it the first time)
Finished eating shrooms at 9:15p.m. I had about enough to fit into the palm of a normal size guys hand.
Don't why I went for psychedilic drugs. When I see movies that have "acid scenes" it turns me off and I wonder why folks want to do it. About 9:45 the rest of the gang starts showing up and they are pumped. Then I start feeling strange! Racing hart getting nervous. Tried to talk to keep my mind off it but I could tell folks were beginning to see something was wrong. I called my buddy to the next room and could feel I was losing it and freaking out. I told him what was up and he tried to calm me and relax me. Told me to look outside but the Vegas skyline didn't help but me me feel sufficated like the loudly decorated room. My sentebces became incoherent and I told my buddy to go on out so as to not ruin his time and his friends. He was reluctant to leave but I insisted.
Like a glass of water filling up I became more and more confused and delerious. I started feeling clostaphobic and noticed fine detaels in the wall paper and curtains.CNN announcers voice on TV sounded louder as though she were trying to scream at me then sounded slurred as if a tape recorder was low on batteries. I flipped the TV off and immediately started hearing what I interprted as demonic whispers in my ear. Then my body felt heavy espeicially around my knees and I crashed to the bed to try to calm down but it was no use. I started saying, "God, I'm so tired please let this be over!" My mind or God said, "No, you and I have some things we need to talk about."
Colors were becoming vivid and bright but in an unpleasant manner. "You have been filling your mind with crap trying to become something you're not or find something you can't," said my mind/God. I thought that maybe I should get out of the room but thought of a public freak out in the casino all caught on tape and a trip to jail or the hospital. "you've really fixed yourself now!" said my mom's voice. I really started freaking. All of this happening while I was pacing around or squirmming on the bed. I thought fuck it I could call an ambulance to come and give me a sedative and face the consequences. Then thought better and put the phone down.
My mind was spasming every emotion it could think of and shutting down the others that weren't present. Then all of a sudden I couldn't smell and my naked shoulder looked like a swelling baloon. I ripped off my clothes and my necklace broke spewing beads everywhere. I started crying saying, "Please make this stop!! I can't take it!!" Pure fury took over because I was in my favorite town terrified while everyone else was partying. I hit the wall with my fist but no damage.
Voices/thoughtsping over and over and over in my head some from Bluelight threads. "You might not want to do shrooms your first time in Vegas!" "What if i stay in this permanenet state?!" Istarting throwing up but couldn't. The walls around the toilet seemed to suck in around my head and I started doing repetitive/obsessive disorder like things. Turn the TV off to make me fell better which didn't work so turn it back on (about 6 times). Became very cold so I ran a bath. My feet felt good under running water but the noise paniced me so turned it off. Silence was madening so I turned it back on (did this about 12 times).
More voices, "you should have been filling your head with better stuff for the journey." "If your mind is normal than you want freak out!" Then I went through a period of exctacy like euphoria for about 10 min. The room looked like you were looking through a yellow tinted glass that was slightly smokey. I felt poetic and started talking to myself saying things like,"and you wanted this stop before now stupid!" I started to write things on paper like "don't follow the insane scribe." The paper looked like it was down a long tunnel along with my hand which brought me back into terror!!
In order to wrap this up so you don't get even more bored....I started cying over the death of my father and the loneliness of my mother. Started saying hoe beautiful my niece was nad how I loved and longed for my beautiful wife. I laid on the bed switching from one TV station to another because if I stayed on one too long it would agitate me. The religious channel's preacher was making a whole lot of sence and even now that only two days have passed religious verbage doesn't seem as silly as I once thought. My heart was beating very fast while all this was going on and I was worried about a heart attack so I tried calming myself down and bout 4:45a.m. I went to sleep...finnally
The next day I felt very depressed. Around 1:00p We strted drinking a little and I felt better. Then went to a rersteraunt to eat. When I set down I started feeling the panic feelings. I controlled them better but almost lost it and had to do splash my face with water in the bathroom a couple of times. Then as the night went and we were out in the casino I started feeling better. I'm sure I will feel better in a few days. This was a much worse comedown/hangover than E. The entire experience I felt like Tom Cruise in Vanilla sky when he screamed for a tech or what's his name in The Matrix when he was freaking out learning about what reality was and he ended up puking.
I'm definately through with hallucinagens. Even though E is considered one there is no way you can tell me the "freak out factor" is as much or even close with E as it is with shrooms/acid.
PLease excuse misspellings and long report.
Me: 31 yrs old,professional. Very analytical and busy mind. A little worried type of person that does over react sometimes. Some insecurities about relationships,what people think of me and how I do things.Although basically a "good guy" I am fascinated with bad behavior and people who misbehave. Weekend drinker only once to the point of puking.Do get impatient when I shouldn't. Smoked pot a half a dozen times. Done E three times (which I prefer and will stick with because so far it's the best I've comeacross). No existing medical condition.No meds.
Pre-Disposition: Think finding yourself through drugs is bull. Talking to God or higher being on drugs is bull and you can controll your trip entirely.
Setting: Vegas Baby!Was and still is my favorite party city.(first mistake for 1st time shroomer)My birthday. Hotel room waiting for my friends pals to get in to town. Guys weekend>
People: A guy I had known for about a year and 4 of his out of town friends.(second mistake..always do it with people you know and who are doing it the first time)
Finished eating shrooms at 9:15p.m. I had about enough to fit into the palm of a normal size guys hand.
Don't why I went for psychedilic drugs. When I see movies that have "acid scenes" it turns me off and I wonder why folks want to do it. About 9:45 the rest of the gang starts showing up and they are pumped. Then I start feeling strange! Racing hart getting nervous. Tried to talk to keep my mind off it but I could tell folks were beginning to see something was wrong. I called my buddy to the next room and could feel I was losing it and freaking out. I told him what was up and he tried to calm me and relax me. Told me to look outside but the Vegas skyline didn't help but me me feel sufficated like the loudly decorated room. My sentebces became incoherent and I told my buddy to go on out so as to not ruin his time and his friends. He was reluctant to leave but I insisted.
Like a glass of water filling up I became more and more confused and delerious. I started feeling clostaphobic and noticed fine detaels in the wall paper and curtains.CNN announcers voice on TV sounded louder as though she were trying to scream at me then sounded slurred as if a tape recorder was low on batteries. I flipped the TV off and immediately started hearing what I interprted as demonic whispers in my ear. Then my body felt heavy espeicially around my knees and I crashed to the bed to try to calm down but it was no use. I started saying, "God, I'm so tired please let this be over!" My mind or God said, "No, you and I have some things we need to talk about."
Colors were becoming vivid and bright but in an unpleasant manner. "You have been filling your mind with crap trying to become something you're not or find something you can't," said my mind/God. I thought that maybe I should get out of the room but thought of a public freak out in the casino all caught on tape and a trip to jail or the hospital. "you've really fixed yourself now!" said my mom's voice. I really started freaking. All of this happening while I was pacing around or squirmming on the bed. I thought fuck it I could call an ambulance to come and give me a sedative and face the consequences. Then thought better and put the phone down.
My mind was spasming every emotion it could think of and shutting down the others that weren't present. Then all of a sudden I couldn't smell and my naked shoulder looked like a swelling baloon. I ripped off my clothes and my necklace broke spewing beads everywhere. I started crying saying, "Please make this stop!! I can't take it!!" Pure fury took over because I was in my favorite town terrified while everyone else was partying. I hit the wall with my fist but no damage.
Voices/thoughtsping over and over and over in my head some from Bluelight threads. "You might not want to do shrooms your first time in Vegas!" "What if i stay in this permanenet state?!" Istarting throwing up but couldn't. The walls around the toilet seemed to suck in around my head and I started doing repetitive/obsessive disorder like things. Turn the TV off to make me fell better which didn't work so turn it back on (about 6 times). Became very cold so I ran a bath. My feet felt good under running water but the noise paniced me so turned it off. Silence was madening so I turned it back on (did this about 12 times).
More voices, "you should have been filling your head with better stuff for the journey." "If your mind is normal than you want freak out!" Then I went through a period of exctacy like euphoria for about 10 min. The room looked like you were looking through a yellow tinted glass that was slightly smokey. I felt poetic and started talking to myself saying things like,"and you wanted this stop before now stupid!" I started to write things on paper like "don't follow the insane scribe." The paper looked like it was down a long tunnel along with my hand which brought me back into terror!!
In order to wrap this up so you don't get even more bored....I started cying over the death of my father and the loneliness of my mother. Started saying hoe beautiful my niece was nad how I loved and longed for my beautiful wife. I laid on the bed switching from one TV station to another because if I stayed on one too long it would agitate me. The religious channel's preacher was making a whole lot of sence and even now that only two days have passed religious verbage doesn't seem as silly as I once thought. My heart was beating very fast while all this was going on and I was worried about a heart attack so I tried calming myself down and bout 4:45a.m. I went to sleep...finnally
The next day I felt very depressed. Around 1:00p We strted drinking a little and I felt better. Then went to a rersteraunt to eat. When I set down I started feeling the panic feelings. I controlled them better but almost lost it and had to do splash my face with water in the bathroom a couple of times. Then as the night went and we were out in the casino I started feeling better. I'm sure I will feel better in a few days. This was a much worse comedown/hangover than E. The entire experience I felt like Tom Cruise in Vanilla sky when he screamed for a tech or what's his name in The Matrix when he was freaking out learning about what reality was and he ended up puking.
I'm definately through with hallucinagens. Even though E is considered one there is no way you can tell me the "freak out factor" is as much or even close with E as it is with shrooms/acid.
. I hope you at least had fun with the rest of your trip in Vegas!
