Crow
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Jun 12, 2000
- Messages
- 8,635
Speaker of the Unsaid May 12,2001
I’m seated in the back seat of my car 5 stems in hand, slowly placing each to the left of my mouth, chewing this god awful dry fungus into a paste before swallowing. So I walk into the venue, here I am, Outerlimits 5th year anniversary party Deepsky, DJ Dan, DJ Micro, I’ve waited so long for this moment. Looking around not knowing what to expect. I mean, I’ve read the stories, the physiological research. I know the “how to’s” and “what does” of this substance, but like always, understanding comes from doing. In an instant all the neurons in my skin tingle with a vibrating sensation. Like a distant hum that you feel creeping through your feet and leaves via your fingertips.
I turn to my friend Jon and all I can say to him is “Oh god I’m feeling it.” He turns and smiles with a ‘grinch like’ smirk and says “Just wait.” I nod and turn facing the entrance waiting for my friend.
V finally enters the building and I dart off to fully experience the music that has started to come inside me and leave me with such a tingling sensation. Waves of sound crash into me sending my body into full convulsions of pure energy. Rocking the cells of my body to the pitch of electronica. I feel pulled to the stage as Deepsky’s set begins. I go, arms raised, fists pumping to the beat, my body one ball of kinetic energy enwrapped in a euphoric trance, I feel a great energy in my presence. So overwhelming – I am in awe.
I shudder to control and “feel” this sensation. My soul smiles absorbing and feeling an understanding it always knew was there but just was always beyond my reach. Finally the door has been opened. I understand…
It is all connected. Everything in this life is linked to one another. Man, has built so much out of fear to make sense of what cannot make sense. What is not supposed to make sense. Simple observations and concepts manipulated and blown to mass proportions of delusion, the holes filled with deductive reasoning or mad ideas. The scared masses follow out of fear of rejection and the simple need for acceptance.
Yes acceptance that is what it all comes down to. This is why the masses heard like beast of the land; this is why we hold to worthless objects only the shallow can see value in. The concept of fear has overridden our true selves. Robed us of humanity, unable to trust anyone anymore. We do so much to protect ourselves from harm that we have locked ourselves into a personal hell, all to protect a future we see so far off into the distance that we forget that the destination is not what makes us happy. It is a journey and the destination is all but a stop till another journey begins.
The journey – so complex – so deep an experience – to each his own journey is special, but only special if he ‘truly’ sees the path he walks. For so many have walked by that opportunity, ignored the open door just living for objects and shallow ideas, their journey wasted they have learned nothing from it.
Materialism has driven us to want “godlike” status over our fellow man. It has warped our thinking; we believe that possession gives us status over others. But how special does and object make you when there are hundreds more of that object in the living rooms of others, making them also special? To obtain these things we have turned to lies and cheating in our everyday life using the “mirror image” excuse of “if not me then, you” thinking. So sad is this…and I travel further.
As I walk around this venue I sit next to my friend V. In my overwhelmed state I struggle to describe how I feel. How my mind surfs the waves of understanding one thought gliding into another, connecting all that I have questioned. In my state of frustration I stay seated and watch those dance around me. I feel the Chi of their intentions. I see those who truly dance from there soul, such an entrancing site for my eyes. I see those who dance with a cloak of hindrance around them, just itching to let go and be free, so close. I see the jaded ravers with their struggle to live with the imperfection they see and just cannot accept. I see the predators, looking for a piece of ass to satisfy the hunger, their Limbic system calling for them to obtain a night of “worldly satisfaction” to feel whole.
And I see my friends, true people that sit around me. People, who are honest with me, listen to me, and I listen to them. They are not afraid of what I say, of what I feel being broadcasted from there souls into my mind. I talk to them of their pain, pleasures, fears, and insecurities, so much coming into me and I can only say so little, so limited by words.
Some also tell me about myself, for I too am not immune to societies fears. I listen to what they have heard from my soul. What they see with their “third eye” and fell from the “sixth sense.” I am amazed at how my character is read so easily, so accurately, how easy it is for others to see the true me. I finally come to grips with so much in my life for once I feel a peace that I once thought was not attainable. I still feel it today, weeks later I have taken so much from this trip. It has made me grow to who I want to be, who I need to be, a speaker for the unsaid.
------------------
"It is not our differences that divide us. It is our inability to accept and tolerate those differences."
**~Offical Intern of the Soulfly Broadcasting System~**
Friendship
Unity
Caring
Kindness
I’m seated in the back seat of my car 5 stems in hand, slowly placing each to the left of my mouth, chewing this god awful dry fungus into a paste before swallowing. So I walk into the venue, here I am, Outerlimits 5th year anniversary party Deepsky, DJ Dan, DJ Micro, I’ve waited so long for this moment. Looking around not knowing what to expect. I mean, I’ve read the stories, the physiological research. I know the “how to’s” and “what does” of this substance, but like always, understanding comes from doing. In an instant all the neurons in my skin tingle with a vibrating sensation. Like a distant hum that you feel creeping through your feet and leaves via your fingertips.
I turn to my friend Jon and all I can say to him is “Oh god I’m feeling it.” He turns and smiles with a ‘grinch like’ smirk and says “Just wait.” I nod and turn facing the entrance waiting for my friend.
V finally enters the building and I dart off to fully experience the music that has started to come inside me and leave me with such a tingling sensation. Waves of sound crash into me sending my body into full convulsions of pure energy. Rocking the cells of my body to the pitch of electronica. I feel pulled to the stage as Deepsky’s set begins. I go, arms raised, fists pumping to the beat, my body one ball of kinetic energy enwrapped in a euphoric trance, I feel a great energy in my presence. So overwhelming – I am in awe.
I shudder to control and “feel” this sensation. My soul smiles absorbing and feeling an understanding it always knew was there but just was always beyond my reach. Finally the door has been opened. I understand…
It is all connected. Everything in this life is linked to one another. Man, has built so much out of fear to make sense of what cannot make sense. What is not supposed to make sense. Simple observations and concepts manipulated and blown to mass proportions of delusion, the holes filled with deductive reasoning or mad ideas. The scared masses follow out of fear of rejection and the simple need for acceptance.
Yes acceptance that is what it all comes down to. This is why the masses heard like beast of the land; this is why we hold to worthless objects only the shallow can see value in. The concept of fear has overridden our true selves. Robed us of humanity, unable to trust anyone anymore. We do so much to protect ourselves from harm that we have locked ourselves into a personal hell, all to protect a future we see so far off into the distance that we forget that the destination is not what makes us happy. It is a journey and the destination is all but a stop till another journey begins.
The journey – so complex – so deep an experience – to each his own journey is special, but only special if he ‘truly’ sees the path he walks. For so many have walked by that opportunity, ignored the open door just living for objects and shallow ideas, their journey wasted they have learned nothing from it.
Materialism has driven us to want “godlike” status over our fellow man. It has warped our thinking; we believe that possession gives us status over others. But how special does and object make you when there are hundreds more of that object in the living rooms of others, making them also special? To obtain these things we have turned to lies and cheating in our everyday life using the “mirror image” excuse of “if not me then, you” thinking. So sad is this…and I travel further.
As I walk around this venue I sit next to my friend V. In my overwhelmed state I struggle to describe how I feel. How my mind surfs the waves of understanding one thought gliding into another, connecting all that I have questioned. In my state of frustration I stay seated and watch those dance around me. I feel the Chi of their intentions. I see those who truly dance from there soul, such an entrancing site for my eyes. I see those who dance with a cloak of hindrance around them, just itching to let go and be free, so close. I see the jaded ravers with their struggle to live with the imperfection they see and just cannot accept. I see the predators, looking for a piece of ass to satisfy the hunger, their Limbic system calling for them to obtain a night of “worldly satisfaction” to feel whole.
And I see my friends, true people that sit around me. People, who are honest with me, listen to me, and I listen to them. They are not afraid of what I say, of what I feel being broadcasted from there souls into my mind. I talk to them of their pain, pleasures, fears, and insecurities, so much coming into me and I can only say so little, so limited by words.
Some also tell me about myself, for I too am not immune to societies fears. I listen to what they have heard from my soul. What they see with their “third eye” and fell from the “sixth sense.” I am amazed at how my character is read so easily, so accurately, how easy it is for others to see the true me. I finally come to grips with so much in my life for once I feel a peace that I once thought was not attainable. I still feel it today, weeks later I have taken so much from this trip. It has made me grow to who I want to be, who I need to be, a speaker for the unsaid.
------------------
"It is not our differences that divide us. It is our inability to accept and tolerate those differences."
**~Offical Intern of the Soulfly Broadcasting System~**
Friendship
Unity
Caring
Kindness
