Moving to another state

[euphoria]

Fuck me... Started going through some of my stuff today. Don't even know the best way to sell all this crap. Craigslist or yard sale I guess. Overwhelming how much crap I have that I don't use.

its crazy the realization you come to when you start packing your stuff to move. "holy shit I don't ever use any of this stuff!" you start pulling crap out of the closet you didnt even know you had. it's kind of a high to get rid of everything you don't need, and get back to the basics. you feel really light afterwards! makes you realize what's really important: relationships, food, and a roof over your head. that's about it. haha~!

craigslist for selling stuff: i find that the more (quality) photos and more detailed description you put on the craigslist ad, the faster the stuff moves. you could also make a list of everything you need to sell with suggested prices and post it up on facebook or email it to your friends. they might be able to take some stuff off your hands. all the stuff you can't sell, drop off at goodwill or salvation army and get a receipt, you can put it as a deduction on your taxes.

I can, but you have to live in the state first before you can apply... That makes total sense right?

maybe you could sublet a room in a shared apartment/house for awhile just to get yourself set up... not ideal if you wanted to live alone, but it could be good for initially meeting some people and their friends. and saves $$$!

 

[nuttynutskin]

Blah... Don't know if it's mood swings or something but feeling today like it's going to be impossible for me to get out on my own. Even with the cheapest place I can find I would only have about 300 bucks left over. I probably could spend that pretty easily on food alone. Thing is eventually I'm going to have to figure out something because my parents aren't going to live forever.

maybe you could sublet a room in a shared apartment/house for awhile just to get yourself set up... not ideal if you wanted to live alone, but it could be good for initially meeting some people and their friends. and saves $$$!

Financially that would be best, but for someone with social phobia probably not the best thing to be thrown into.

 

[euphoria]

You'd be surprised what you can handle, dude. Don't tell yourself you have social phobia, and that it limits you from doing things, when you start to define these beliefs in your mind they become fact too easily. Social phobia is something that can be overcome. Sharing housing isn't nearly as immersive or overwhelming (to me at least) as being in a social situation like a party or an interview. And this is coming from someone who has moderate to severe social anxiety. It's merely living under the same roof with some other people. You still get your own room and privacy. I've lived with roommates who are extremely unsocial and we never talked or hung out at all. We just shared bills. I've also lived with roommates who helped me incredibly with social anxiety by including me in things at home like dinner, and going out with them and their friends. It's a lot easier to deal with if you just break it down into chunks and let yourself get comfortable with one thing at a time. You'd be amazed what you're actually capable of if you get rid of these limiting beliefs like "I can't do this because I have social phobia". Chances are you don't actually have social phobia, you've just been telling yourself that for so long that your body just starts to emulate those beliefs. It's reversible though. You can always change your situation. Keep an open mind. As you venture out of your parents house and do more things for yourself, and start breaking those negative beliefs about yourself, your momentum will only build and your self confidence will only grow. YOU CAN DO IT! Good luck dude

 

[Perpetual Indulgence]

My parents were always of the attitude, don't move out until you know you are never coming back. This meant either you stayed in school to acquire an education that will get you a decent paying job or worked full time after high school and paid them "rent" and kept money in the bank. I was the former. My brother was the latter. Once I started my Master's program they downsized. I slept in the "office" when I came home to visit. They said I wasn't coming back and they were right.

At 26, I moved from Canada to the US without knowing anyone or the state I was moving to. The key point was ensuring I had job first or else I could not get a working visa. As for finding an apartment, I used a real estate agent and rented a place that I only saw in photos which worked out great. Doctors, hairstylists, spa, places to shop and eat I would find after talking to co-workers.

At 37, I also moved within the US without any trauma once I got my green card in 2009. First and foremost, I solidified employment. Sold a house and bought another. Drove 10 hours with pets. Hired a moving company. I have earned the ability of having financial means to do these things. Albeit sometimes stuff went on a credit card but it got paid in the end.

 

[nuttynutskin]

You'd be surprised what you can handle, dude. Don't tell yourself you have social phobia, and that it limits you from doing things, when you start to define these beliefs in your mind they become fact too easily. Social phobia is something that can be overcome. Sharing housing isn't nearly as immersive or overwhelming (to me at least) as being in a social situation like a party or an interview. And this is coming from someone who has moderate to severe social anxiety. It's merely living under the same roof with some other people. You still get your own room and privacy. I've lived with roommates who are extremely unsocial and we never talked or hung out at all. We just shared bills. I've also lived with roommates who helped me incredibly with social anxiety by including me in things at home like dinner, and going out with them and their friends. It's a lot easier to deal with if you just break it down into chunks and let yourself get comfortable with one thing at a time. You'd be amazed what you're actually capable of if you get rid of these limiting beliefs like "I can't do this because I have social phobia". Chances are you don't actually have social phobia, you've just been telling yourself that for so long that your body just starts to emulate those beliefs. It's reversible though. You can always change your situation. Keep an open mind. As you venture out of your parents house and do more things for yourself, and start breaking those negative beliefs about yourself, your momentum will only build and your self confidence will only grow. YOU CAN DO IT! Good luck dude

Ummm along with being bipolar I was diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder and have panic attacks sometimes. I don't exactly need to tell myself anything to know. It's not like my doctor handed out xanax for the fun of it. Not to shit on your post, but I think you might not quite understand the severity of it. Maybe eventually I could live with other people, but in my present state it would just be like sensory overload. Plus I've been living so long with someone I don't get along with, I really just need my own place, even if it's a trailer home or something.

 

[my3rdeye]

I moved across country with my cat, she forgave me eventually. I drove though, I can't imagine flying with just two suitcases to start over but alot of people do just that. When i moved far i flew out and found a place and then went back and got my stuff, its an extra plane ticket and if where you are going has high vacancy you may not need to that. I like to have a job and apartment lined up before moving. Or at least a bunch of interviews. Alot of employers won't bother calling out of state area codes on your resume, try to hide fact you are aren't there yet. Good luck its way better on your own then your parents.

 

[euphoria]

Ummm along with being bipolar I was diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder and have panic attacks sometimes. I don't exactly need to tell myself anything to know. It's not like my doctor handed out xanax for the fun of it. Not to shit on your post, but I think you might not quite understand the severity of it. Maybe eventually I could live with other people, but in my present state it would just be like sensory overload. Plus I've been living so long with someone I don't get along with, I really just need my own place, even if it's a trailer home or something.

I have lived my entire life with generalized anxiety, depression, and acute panic disorder, and I've been prescribed every ssri, mood stabilizer, and benzodiazepine under the sun. I have debilitating panic attacks almost every day. I was "diagnosed" bipolar in my teens. I am growing to understand that your beliefs can truly define your biology. Don't let people, books, doctors, even your own thoughts hold you back from getting better.

I can't say I completely understand your specific situation but I was just trying to offer some advice and positive thoughts in case it helps you feel better at all. I've been reaching out to you because I feel empathy for you and your situation. I know the depths of how bad it really can feel living with "a mental disorder" and I'm just trying to present the idea to you that you don't have to believe you have a mental disorder. You can work past it, no matter what you've been told. Check out this book, it's amazing: Biology of Belief

I just wanted to say that you shouldn't tell yourself that you "can't" do things because you have anxiety or bipolar disorder. That thought in and of itself limits you. Turn it around into a positive statement. "I might feel anxiety or fear right now, but I CAN do this anyway." You're a normal human being, just like everyone else, your brain is not fucked up (science knows relatively very little about how brain chemistry affects mood disorders), you just have a faulty belief system. But you can work past that. Beliefs are something you have control over. You'd be surprised what you can actually do. Just take one thing at a time. So don't limit yourself by saying "I have a mental health problem so I can't do this like everybody else can". Do you see how that really cuts you off from ever pulling yourself out of it, changing, or truly living your life?

This concept has been somewhat of an epiphany for me personally, that I've been coming to realize in the past few months, and I just want to share it because it resonates so deeply within me. I've stopped saying "I have anxiety" or "I get panic attacks". I just start thinking of myself as being a normal person reacting to the world around me. I'm normal. These things will go away. And it's okay. I don't come to expect them, and I don't fight them when they happen. I just focus on pushing myself out of that state where I've given up and let the anxiety defeat me. I truly want to not be on medication anymore, and I truly believe that I can change the way my body reacts through my positive thoughts and strong beliefs.

I wish you the best

 

[nuttynutskin]

No I do appreciate it, you're trying to help. Just differ on some opinions. I'm not trying to limit myself with my diagnosis but at the same time it doesn't make the symptoms go away. Treatment resistant depression really sucks. I will check out your link tho.

 

[nuttynutskin]

Has anyone here lived in a travel trailer? It's currently the option I'm looking into but don't really know much about them or what to look for in regards to buying one.

 

[socko]

Travel trailers are great. I've done that. There is plenty of room for 1 person. Maybe 2 if all you own is a few suitcases of stuff. Many have indoor water, electricity, toilet, heat and AC in some. Just make sure you find a good place to put it. I've heard that the silver airplane-looking trailers have the best design as far as ergonomics of living.

I'm en route back to San Francisco from the high desert of eastern Oregon where I had been living off the grid for a year. All of my belongings are strapped to the back of a motorcycle. The cat is being sent down with my gf. I'll be almost neighbors with Alisdairm in Sacramento. After a few months, I'm moving to Europe.

As for the cat, he's riding separately with my gf. When I go to Europe, the cat will not go in the cargo hold of a plane. It gets partially depressurized and would severely traumatize the cat. The cat will be given kitty valium, put into a tiny carrier, and ride under the seat in cabin. That or I will try to get my gf to keep him. He was a stray that she took in, and he's supposed to be her cat after all.

As for changing banks, that's easy. Just open an account in a new bank by writing a check to yourself from the old bank.

 

[nuttynutskin]

Thanks for the post. Is there anything I should look out for when looking?