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Moved in a flat with boring flatmates

Tude said:
There's no clubs/bars, etc. where you live?
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There are plenty, but the culture is that people go to those places in groups or maybe as couples, and given this , what are their incentives to talk to me anyway?
 
In my view, the only reason to have flatmates is to split the rent. If all goes well, we'll pass like ships in the night and keep to ourselves. Perhaps we'll say hello to each other every now and then.

That's it.
 
I'm so fucking jealous

My roommates are exact opposite. Basically they've been best friends since birth, and met me last year. They're practically boyfriends and never disagree with each other. One of them is totally psycho, when hes in a bad mood, comes into my room,yells at me and treats me like shit, and then when I try to avoid him he's all "why don't you like me". Fucking faggot, and the nice one just kind of goes along with it even though he realizes his buttbuddy is a douchebag to everyone but him. So I spend all my time locked in my room and trying to avoid being verbally raped everyday cuz I'm too pussy to ever say anything back :\

So consider yourself lucky. I would die to live with your "flatmates"
 
^lol dude. you need to stir some shit up and speak up. find a new place to live and then raise hell before you leave.
 
I've lived with other people before. If we were both in the kitchen we would chat but our rooms were our private spaces and a closed door meant keep out. For me, home is my "sanctuary." When I'm home, I want peace and quiet... I typically work two jobs AND go to school. I talk to people all day at work, at home I don't want to talk to people unless its friends I invited over.

I think the OP needs to understand that people have different needs/wants and "home" means different things to different people. I got the distinct impression that the OP may have a little too much time on their hands if they're sitting in their room waiting for their roommates to come socialize with them... If I'm home I'm sleep, cooking, or cleaning. I'm not sitting around doing nothing... If I was lucky enough to have the time to do so I would use that to invite friends over/go out and see friends because I'm so busy I don't get to see them as much as I'd like.
 
rhun said:
I've lived with other people before. If we were both in the kitchen we would chat but our rooms were our private spaces and a closed door meant keep out. For me, home is my "sanctuary." When I'm home, I want peace and quiet... I typically work two jobs AND go to school. I talk to people all day at work, at home I don't want to talk to people unless its friends I invited over.

I think the OP needs to understand that people have different needs/wants and "home" means different things to different people. I got the distinct impression that the OP may have a little too much time on their hands if they're sitting in their room waiting for their roommates to come socialize with them... If I'm home I'm sleep, cooking, or cleaning. I'm not sitting around doing nothing... If I was lucky enough to have the time to do so I would use that to invite friends over/go out and see friends because I'm so busy I don't get to see them as much as I'd like.
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I can't but feel sorry for you working so much. But some people are masochistic by nature so maybe we would get along well as flatmates hahaha
 
laVoix said:
There are plenty, but the culture is that people go to those places in groups or maybe as couples, and given this , what are their incentives to talk to me anyway?
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I go to parties alone on occasion and I can usually meet people. It's fun. Nowadays I almost always go with my boyfriend but there are still some times when I go clubbing by myself (maybe he has to work the next day or something and can't go out) and I meet lots of people. I've met quite a few good friends through clubbing.

Illyria99 said:
In my view, the only reason to have flatmates is to split the rent. If all goes well, we'll pass like ships in the night and keep to ourselves. Perhaps we'll say hello to each other every now and then.

That's it.
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Yeah, I like that about flatmates. I like having my own personal space. I don't mind saying hi to them when I see them in the kitchen and whatnot and seeing how they are doing. Since I always had flatmates in college, I'd just chat about our courses and work and future plans and stuff. But nothing in depth.
Many people just want home to be home and not have to worry about having to deal with people at home. Generally, they are more anti-social people. There are some houses where everyone is BFFs and they party all the time. That may be a better fit for the OP.
 
They're just normal quiet people OP! Most people are like that. not everyone has to flaunt the fact that they're 'interesting' to their housemates or anyone else, some keep it to themselves... To be perfectly honest it sounds like a really decent peaceful living environment.

It's important to understand in your circumstances that they haven't actively sought you out or chosen to live with you. It's ridiculous to expect or demand a friendship under those circumstances.

doing things like singing with your door open or making noise to force people to come and talk to you are probably perceived by such people as highly irritating. they would probably love to tell you to shut up but they're probably hindered by a concern with maintaining a quiet, peaceful living environment. It's your job as their housemate to respect that. you should consider the possibility that maybe the social cohesion of the household is the understanding that people will be quiet and respect each others space. the fact that you're harbouring animosity towards them for being "quiet and boring" and making crass judgments about their mental health is going to amplify any existing negativity immensely. maybe you're the one being anti-social ;)
 
laVoix said:
Gosh, are they...yes they are...

I just recently moved to another town and now I am living with some erasmus students, man are they boring!!

Been here for a week, we share the same flat, most of the time they're invisible.
The guy nextdoor is a cool guy, when I came the first day at least he knocked to great me and say hi. He's some Brit, he claims he's busy so spends most of the time locked in his room. So might be really justified.
The girl of European descent nextdoor is a real pain, didn't even want to speak our common language, but played the Miss Englishwomen from the day one speaking only 'Englishc" (probably wants to practice and use me as a practice tool since I speak better than her). I barely know why she is around at all cuz she hasn't disclosed anything and is locked inside her room 99.99% of the time, just rushing to the bathroom and back once in the evening.

I leave the door of my room open on purpose all the time to see if she'd get a clue and come say 'hi' at least, but no, the bitch is passing by like a ghost 10 times over days, and she is a future manager, omg??
I started singing on purpose in my room hoping that somebody will at least come and tell me to shut up, but no, it's all dead silence.

They study the same uni but dunno if they fucked. Seems a bit odd.

The third person is also a girl with some psyvhotic disorder. She is petrified whenever she is going around and that's usually around 5 am since she works 2 jobs and I guess is sealed.

Why fths are people so complicated?
It could be all very easy, like 'hi, what are you doing?', me 'come and sit on my bed', she 'Ok, what you're up to?'...:P

Can't really get it. Only to start drinking alone. Or move flats.
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man ive been in a similar situation but I preferred it that way. Being left to myself so I could hangout with my friends and not be judged for taking drugs. At least they don't come into your room and spread their boringness to you!!
 
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