Mental Health Mental health issues after drug use?

ggarza921

Bluelighter
Joined
Apr 26, 2013
Messages
105
Location
TX
Hey everyone

Lately, I've been recovering from my only two times using X. Unfortunately these first two times had to be back-to-back days. I had bought and taken two molly caps from some dude in my class. Was it actually MDMA? I didn't test, but very likely.. There was no question that the first night I had taken the molly was one of the best nights I've had in a long time. It definitely wasn't pure though. The second night was a mistake, and I should have done my research before I did it a second time. Why am I worried and why am I posting on MH? Because it's been 6.5 months since that second night without a full recovery.

This has been a pretty rough week for me. I was actually making good progress in my recovery up until now. I've been having these mental breakdowns after I get back from school/work and end up crying for an hour or more because I feel I will never make it to a full recovery. I am starting to give up on this whole recovery BS, and thus, I feel like giving up on life. I've been having suicide idealization pretty frequently lately, and it's starting to scare me. At month 6.5, I still feel things like this unrelenting head pressure (I just don't know what the fuck it is and why it won't go away), I feel like my attention span isn't as great, as if my thoughts aren't as fluid anymore, this incessant fatigue, and difficulties maintaining a good mood.

I'm just hoping someone out there understands and maybe has some advice to give. Currently, I'm waiting on results from an EEG test from my neurologist, but tbh, I don't expect it to tell much of the condition I'm in. At this point, I'm pretty lost & pretty confused about my current state & where I stand in my "recovery." I was just hoping someone, anyone, out there had some advice to give me. :(

Thanks
 
Hey! MH is a great place for this thread, and I'm sorry I'm currently on my phone. However if you could expand on how long you were high for after these caps, and any details of the experience (physically, mentally) we can gauge a slightly better response.

I will update an answer to the best of my abilities when I get to my comp, and hopefully after you have expanded.
An early guess could be a predisposition, possible AMP cut and/or on certain medications to get serotonin syndrome. This is not to scare but to inform ahead of time.
 
Okay well the first night was great. I was high and peaking for about a solid hour through two hours. Then I started coming down. I felt slightly etarded the next morning and my head hurt a little bit. I got drunk in the afternoon and sobered up before I went on my second night doing it. I popped the second pill, and about 30 minutes later, my brain felt super fried. I had to leave the concert I was at to go back to the hotel. Felt super slow cognitively and I didn't really know what was going on. Woke up the next day very very depressed & anxious. And now I'm here.

I wasn't on any medication at the time of my use.
 
Well, you're seeing a neurologist so you're a step ahead of 95% of the people who log on here.


The problem with ecstacy and with all amphetamines is that researches are reasonable sure that it does cause brain damage relating to memory, cognition, attention span mood, but they often get inconsistent results at when the symptoms check in. Some people can do molly every week for months and not get adverse side effects, but that leaves little show to those unfortunate enough that did one and becomes a severe problem.

Of course, I dont have a real good sense of what happened to you over the internet, and you dont have a good sense what was actually in those pills. Its impossible. But two things rang a bell for me: you didn't allow your body to recover after your first intoxication. Second, you drank alcohol prior and the problem with alcohol is that it tends to dehydrate you while ecstacy it causes hyperthermia, which can be extremely dangerous in itself after drinking. Its certainly possible given your symptoms of lethargy that your body had a difficult time cooling down which may or may not have resulted in either temporary or permanent brain damage. Cases like yours happen, and its not rare.


You are seeing a neurologist so please listen and do everything that he recommends, and even in a worst case scenario that brain damage is suspected, that doesnt mean that you cant alleviate the symptoms or that maybe down the line if you treat your body right neurogenesis can occur.


Hang in there.
 
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Well drugs can definitely do some wacky things with the brain that's for sure. I would avoid any recreational drugs for the near future if you feel unstable at the moment as you obviously do since you made this post. Hopefully someone with a bit more knowledge will chime in but that's all I got for you.
 
long term use of drugs can affect the brain negatively in many ways, i am pretty sure I have fried my GABA receptors from 10 years of benzo abuse.

sounds like you have sought professional help and that is one very important thing. be sure you are making progress, or switch doctors. one thing i've found from seeking professional help is that not all of them are on par. some are better than others and some do better for your specific problems than others, so look around and find someone who works for you.

good luck
 
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