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MDMA Induced anxiety mood swings etc! HELP

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shakeyjakey

Greenlighter
Joined
Nov 26, 2014
Messages
16
Right Hear goes, First of all I know what I have done is stupid so I don't need everyone telling me im a idoit!

I am 22 and from the age of 18 ive been on a constant binge of drugs, abusing mainly Mdma. For the first two years I smashing pills every 3 weeks then recovering fine no problems within a few days. When I hit 20 mdma became soo much easier to get in my area and I smashed it hard doing from 8 pills a night on a weekly basis some times twice a week. Shelving pills on a sunday, and even eating a lemon with pingas inside at the height of my career. Towards the latter part I would sometimes have 8 pills on a Friday night and spank a half weight of meth with my mates in the morning, this went on for about a year and a half. I would like to add that I am an extremely active and healthy person, and I have been at uni for the last two years doing a business degree and my intelligence seems there just barely although the first 3 weeks after use I have the same IQ of a 3 year old primate. Slurred speech, what fucking day is it?, etc

Over the past 7 months I have had mental health issues that I believe is related to my mdma abuse, chronic anxiety, sometimes depressed but not normally it is more my extreme mood swings and erratic personality. When I do mdma now the week after I feel serverly depressed and extremely anxious, by week two I start to feel chronic anxiety mood swings crazy thoughts, extreme pain in my muscles etc. Week three I feel erratic and anxious all through this I have extreme social anxiety. Week 4 my anxiety is starting to disappear my social anxiety is disappearing and I can feel myself coming back to reality however I have not touched mdma for 2months now but I am still feeling anxious but better and feel 60% of the person I was. Can you ever recover fully? Also I am still drinking on the weekend on a fortnightly basis should I stop? Because of the anxiety it causes severe pain in my arms and head like a weird pressure, the doctor prescribed me tramadol but I did some research and it is a ssri aswell, should I stay away from these type of drugs until my brain is balanced. I would like to add that I have never been anxious or depressed before this and I was defiantly one of the more happier people in this world! ha

I need Advice from the people that have been through this (advice on time frames and supplements to recover), so I can start to feel myself again and enjoy life

Thanks
 
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Yes you will recover, though you really need to cut out ALL drugs (alcohol, weed, and caffeine included) for a little while. A couple more months should do it really...caffeine won't be a massive killer to continue consuming in 'normal' amounts, though you're best just abstaining from everything and ensuring to continue eating healthily, getting some regular exercise, and making sure you're sleeping plenty.
 
Ok thanks for the advice! Il keep exercising and eating healthy, when my anxiety was at its worse I couldn't even have a cup of tea without it triggering intense episodes, but as time goes on it is easing
 
Sorry, a bit unrelated to your problem, just a question: were you getting the full range of effect from MDMA throughout your binge or was there a "loss of magic"? Were you missing anything from the roll after a while?
 
the magic went for me after the first few times I did it (4), and now I look back I have just been chasing the 1st time for a year and a half, I honestly don't think I will do mdma again I feel like ecstasy used to be my best friend but he stabbed me in the back. Towards the end of the year and a half binge there was no euphoria with the role, I just felt paranoid and spaced out and happier a tiny bit it, however once I got hold of some high mdma pill from the Netherlands and I was truly fucked and had glimpses off the old days
 
shakeyjakey said:
the magic went for me after the first few times I did it (4), and now I look back I have just been chasing the 1st time for a year and a half, I honestly don't think I will do mdma again I feel like ecstasy used to be my best friend but he stabbed me in the back. Towards the end of the year and a half binge there was no euphoria with the role, I just felt paranoid and spaced out and happier a tiny bit it, however once I got hold of some high mdma pill from the Netherlands and I was truly fucked and had glimpses off the old days
Click to expand...

Story of my life man. im 22 and from 18-19 i heavily abused mdma. i was up to using ecstasy 3 times a week at doses of 5-7 pills each night, and these was high strength pokeballs. since then i have quit ecstasy using like once every 6 months and the magic still aint came back. but i have continued to use meth and other drugs fairly reguarly. i now experience anxiety and panic on the daily and paranoia. my life kinda sucks now. Benzos are also my best friend now. i am constantly looking for xanax, klonopin, etc. if i were to quit all drugs im sure id get a lil better but im obviously a drug addict so thats hard to do.
 
ovo1024 said:
Story of my life man. im 22 and from 18-19 i heavily abused mdma. i was up to using ecstasy 3 times a week at doses of 5-7 pills each night, and these was high strength pokeballs. since then i have quit ecstasy using like once every 6 months and the magic still aint came back. but i have continued to use meth and other drugs fairly reguarly. i now experience anxiety and panic on the daily and paranoia. my life kinda sucks now. Benzos are also my best friend now. i am constantly looking for xanax, klonopin, etc. if i were to quit all drugs im sure id get a lil better but im obviously a drug addict so thats hard to do.
Click to expand...

Yeh man its a horrible feeling, im over my worsed days though now, nearly throwing up every morning from the anxiety was the bad days, my doctor used to say to me so whats the route of your anxiety? I just said I don't know there is no explanation I just feel angry, anxious and stressed 24/7 haha. Man If you stayed off all drugs for a year I am sure there would be magic again with mdma, I think a lot of the "magic" that people talk about getting happens when everything is right in your life, you feel happy and your in the mood to do it. For me it just became a routine I would go out to drink saying im not doing eccys tonight and after 3 pints I had double dropped! It realy takes its toll and there is going to be no "magic" when you feel severely depressed all week. When I feel emotionally balanced to drugs again cocaine will be my drug of choice as I don't realy get a comedown, meth is a bad comedown, but mdma cripples me to the ground! literally kills me I cant handle another comedown one more and I will jump off a bridge! But its weird because when I first started with mdma there was no comedown at all, in fact I felt better the week after!

Keep soldiering on! Time heals all wounds
 
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yes just stay clean and things will indeed become normal but it will be hard to deal with so be strong. i speak from experience. try eating well and getting lots of sunshine helps a lot.
 
turnupboss said:
yes just stay clean and things will indeed become normal but it will be hard to deal with so be strong. i speak from experience. try eating well and getting lots of sunshine helps a lot.
Click to expand...

My memory is poor ATM as well do you think this is related to the anxiety? does memory improve, thanks for your advice. One thing I don't understand is when you look around the sight some people say it took them years to recover other people say a few months, its weird. The people that say years must have other mental issues that should have been addressed before taking drugs don't you think
 
memory will improve its all just temporary impairments from abusing a very powerful drug. i do agree when people say it took them years to recover they must have also had other mental problems. only way i could see it possible for years to recover is from years of non stop serious hardcore abuse. ive been on a 3 month binge before using almost everyday and it took me a couple months to recover. i have been abusing mdma on and off for years and the only long term side effect i have is im more easily prone to episodes of depression but my memory is great though. i eat very healthy foods, stay active and get lots of sunshine plus fresh air to help with my drug use. i swear getting sunshine is a big big help! mind set is also a big factor as well. as for anxiety, i put it in my mind that anxiety does not exist so in return i never have real anxiety. like i said mind set is important. sometimes thoughts can cause placebos to a lot in life. mind over matter.

temporary side effects from abuse ive experienced have been:

mood swings
psychosis(complete loss of reality and psychotic behavior)
hallucinations
extreme weight loss
depression
never anxiety
never memory issues(only short term memory loss during rough come downs)


possibly anxiety puts strain on the brain which could effect memory and other things.
 
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Yeh thanks for your help, I think the anxiety is not directly caused by MDMA but more your own mind self triggered from the depression if you know what I mean I was going through a stressful time also. Its only been a few days and I feel 10x better already, my social anxiety has nearly vanished and I am starting to feel a sense off inner calm that I have not felt in years. I agree with what you said about psychotic behavior the first month after stopping I was nearly convinced that I was developing schizophrenia I would play conversations in my head over and over sometimes even talking to myself out loud! haha, its gone now thank god! not a fun time at all
 
schizophrenia actually seems to be happening a lot to people abusing mdma and other simular drugs. me and my friends have had some episodes of schizo lately. its scary, besides being psychotic but having false beliefs about things i think is real, false conversations and truly hallucinating to the highest level. it has caused me and my friends to have really bad arguments about things that did not exist.
 
shakeyjakey said:
Right Hear goes, First of all I know what I have done is stupid so I don't need everyone telling me im a idoit!

I am 22 and from the age of 18 ive been on a constant binge of drugs, abusing mainly Mdma. For the first two years I smashing pills every 3 weeks then recovering fine no problems within a few days. When I hit 20 mdma became soo much easier to get in my area and I smashed it hard doing from 8 pills a night on a weekly basis some times twice a week. Shelving pills on a sunday, and even eating a lemon with pingas inside at the height of my career. Towards the latter part I would sometimes have 8 pills on a Friday night and spank a half weight of meth with my mates in the morning, this went on for about a year and a half. I would like to add that I am an extremely active and healthy person, and I have been at uni for the last two years doing a business degree and my intelligence seems there just barely although the first 3 weeks after use I have the same IQ of a 3 year old primate. Slurred speech, what fucking day is it?, etc

Over the past 7 months I have had mental health issues that I believe is related to my mdma abuse, chronic anxiety, sometimes depressed but not normally it is more my extreme mood swings and erratic personality. When I do mdma now the week after I feel serverly depressed and extremely anxious, by week two I start to feel chronic anxiety mood swings crazy thoughts, extreme pain in my muscles etc. Week three I feel erratic and anxious all through this I have extreme social anxiety. Week 4 my anxiety is starting to disappear my social anxiety is disappearing and I can feel myself coming back to reality however I have not touched mdma for 2months now but I am still feeling anxious but better and feel 60% of the person I was. Can you ever recover fully? Also I am still drinking on the weekend on a fortnightly basis should I stop? Because of the anxiety it causes severe pain in my arms and head like a weird pressure, the doctor prescribed me tramadol but I did some research and it is a ssri aswell, should I stay away from these type of drugs until my brain is balanced. I would like to add that I have never been anxious or depressed before this and I was defiantly one of the more happier people in this world! ha

I need Advice from the people that have been through this (advice on time frames and supplements to recover), so I can start to feel myself again and enjoy life

Thanks
Click to expand...

You should check in on the LTC support thread.

Good news: You will recover.

Bad news: There is no way of gauging your timeline because 1) we don't know the purity of your product and 2) everyone's physiology and brain is different. I'd ballpark 6-18 months for most people to get to 100% (or a least 80-90% so you can lead a fully functional life).

Quit all drugs now. Even alcohol. Even caffeine.
 
hoketus said:
You should check in on the LTC support thread.

Good news: You will recover.

Bad news: There is no way of gauging your timeline because 1) we don't know the purity of your product and 2) everyone's physiology and brain is different. I'd ballpark 6-18 months for most people to get to 100% (or a least 80-90% so you can lead a fully functional life).

Quit all drugs now. Even alcohol. Even caffeine.
Click to expand...

Thanks for your help, I have quit all drugs, its been two and a half months since I last touched mdma, My mood is still up and down but I am improving without doubt, my memory is not an issue now. Its is just my mood, and my lack of motivation to do anything, I have not seen my friends In a while mainly because I don't want to be around them when I am like this and also they are still abusing mdma heavily. It seems my anxiety and erratic behavior is subsiding but it is leaving me with mild depression. To be honest god knows what is going on but at least I don't think im going crazy anymore. I will stop taking caffeine now as I do think this has an effect on my mood throughout the day, thanks again
 
turnupboss said:
schizophrenia actually seems to be happening a lot to people abusing mdma and other simular drugs. me and my friends have had some episodes of schizo lately. its scary, besides being psychotic but having false beliefs about things i think is real, false conversations and truly hallucinating to the highest level. it has caused me and my friends to have really bad arguments about things that did not exist.
Click to expand...
I totally agree with schizophrenia being a major issue with MDMA. But severe anxiety is also known to cause psychotic behavior. The false conversations I had were bad I would go into a daze for like 5 mins playing out conversations, and then I would eventually stop realize what I was doing, hold my head and go "what the f*ck am I doing". It gradually disappeared but was its worse the following 4 weeks after taking mdma. My friends have also had issues with schizophrenia from heavily abusing weed. Paranoia was a heavy issue with me on the early stages of the recovery, I was convinced that everyone was against me out to do me harm I deleted facebook. I have never had hallucinations thankfully. The major issue out of everything I experienced was extreme mood swings. One thing though is that it was all fun and games with mdma at the beginning it wasn't a gradual thing that got worse, it was just I woke up one morning after a big weekend and my mind wasn't there, there was no warning signs if you know what I mean.

MDMA is the best thing in the world when you first start it brings you closer with your friends and together with new people however down the line it is the total opposite it actually stops your from meeting your friends, new people and socializing haha. You are right its a powerfull drug that should not be underestimated like I did I was just young and stupid.
 
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To the People that have recovered, did you ever have the urge to do MDMA again? Because I feel like I had my fun and now its over
 
the urge is what always drags me back in. its not just the drug but the life style and mental discoveries i find in myself and others. although i have had some out of bounds mdma binges i am now starting to practice true self control after having some crazy events happen to me and my friends. i dont honestly see a way for me to quit because drug culture dwells my mind and is intergrated in my life. i am putting serious limits on my use nowadays though.
 
help

I did 4 dexies and a couple of Xanax on a night out after the 3month mark, stupid idea was drunk and regret it, I felt pretty shit after it, I know it will hinder my recovery, but how much? My mood is still swinging pretty mad and its been over 3-4 months since I last did mdma,

Thanks again
 
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