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managing stress / anger / frustration

aanallein said:
ya pretty much. but exercise is fun for some people (me atleast) so that part is all mental. it will definitely help with the stress too.
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i wish it was fun for me. all it does for me is makes me feel self conscious and not as good as everybody else. i feel totally out of place working out, like it is some competition just like everything else, and im marked a loser from the start.
 
Try mountain biking or hiking, there doesnt need to be anyone around to excercise. I used to be very self conscious about going to the gym, but now I bike, run, and swim pretty regularly without having to deal with anyone else.

I really think having a resting pulse around 65 has saved my life on a few occasions too (too much coke,etc.)
 
I got this book recently about using meditation and weed. Good book but what I got most out of it was realising that a lot of what I was feeling was because of what I was doing to myself. It's kind of hard to explain, but it teaches how to make yourself feel good and get past what your own mind does to you. The meditation part is pretty cool too though, I had the wrong idea before of what it was meant to be about. I'm not really very good yet, but I feel like I've ogt a handle on it now. Take a look: www.headstuffbooks.com

Any other meditators here?
LR
 
LiquidMethod said:
Take a walk. Listen to de-stressing CD's(!). Practice deep breathing. Get a full-body deep tissue massage. Stretch. Get a pet. Stretch the pet. Drive less. Get out of debt. Don't watch the news. Have sex.
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haha all so true though! i like to walk, it is calming and peaceful. massage is great! and i agree, the news is depressing
 
Try some breathing exercises......breathing very deeply and counting slowly from 10 -1 when you feel the onset of an attack can help. Studies have found that it is impossible to have a panic attack when you are breathing deeply and properly.
 
birthdaycake said:
exercising is just such a pain in the ass though. lets face it, it is just not fun. at least for me anyways. im not some obese fat fuck who cant even walk. im a totally normal height / weight proportionate person. im not skinny, im not fat. im average.

but after working all fucking day and driving home fighting traffic, the last thing i want to do is go do something physical. im too fucking tired for it. all i want to do is relax, watch some tv, spend some time online, eat dinner, and go to bed.

maybe this is just a symptom of living in a major metropolitan city in the united states?
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I can totally relate to the exhaustion of a 50+ hour work week. Once I realized that stress was decreasing my quality of life though I had to make a choice. I could either continue to be irritable and on edge or I could push myself to make a lifestyle change. It is easier to do nothing and stay negative. The drawback is that it alienates the people around you. This may be a S/O, coworkers, family members. As much as some may want to deny caring what these people think , the truth is that the way they perceive us affects the quality of our lives. It dictates whether we end up in arguments or resolve conflicts peacefully. It is the difference between a child hearing parents fight or hearing them laugh. A bad attitude can leave one unemployed and lonely; more reason to be stressed and sad.

The other option is to make some changes. At first, exercising was not fun for me either. I looked at it as a chore. I did not go to a gym b/c I was self conscious about my physical condition. At the same time, the only way to fix what I was unhappy with was to take action. I started doing pushups and crunches while watching TV. Instead of focusing on the physical exertion I would laugh at the jokes. When my year old daughter is dozing off to sleep in her crib, I will put on some ambient music at low volume. While she is falling asleep I will sit on the floor and do stretching exercises. Instead of focusing on the exercise itself I will focus on the time with her or the music.

Find creative ways to make yourself enjoy the work that you need to do to function at a higher level. Once you start feeling better, that will motivate you to continue to find ways to feel better. The first steps are the hardest but I do not think that once you see some positive changes you will regret taking them.
 
after re-reading all the replys to my original post, ive noticed alot of them are things that i can do "after the fact". im more so looking for something or some technique i can use for managing stress in the here and now, at its very moment. i constantly feel like i want to just start a fight or break something or just tell all to piss off when i get angry/frustrated. is there anything out there that i can do to help when i am having these feelings?
 
exercise. we already went over this.

honestly there is no better way to prevent stress from happening than to exercise regularly. I have an incredibly stressful job but it hardly bothers me because I work out almost everyday so my cardiovascular system isn't as strained in stressful situations so a lot of the sub conscience mechanisms don't even trigger to get me worked up.
 
aanallein said:
exercise. we already went over this.

honestly there is no better way to prevent stress from happening than to exercise regularly. I have an incredibly stressful job but it hardly bothers me because I work out almost everyday so my cardiovascular system isn't as strained in stressful situations so a lot of the sub conscience mechanisms don't even trigger to get me worked up.
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but i just dont see the connection as to how exercise can help with stress when it is happening. i mean, i can see having a totally stressful day, and THEN going and exercising and feeling good or whatever, but i dont find how the two connect to benefit me in the actual time and place of stress. maybe im just not getting it?

its not like i am against exercise or anything, but lets be honest here, alot of people (maybe this is more so true in urban/sub-urban america) are so busy with all these things in their lives, that they dont have the time nor energy to exercise. i mean, when i put in a 9 hour day at the job, spend an hour in traffic coming home, etc, the last thing i want to do is go workout or something. id much rather sit down, eat dinner, and watch the football game on tv.

im sorry if i dont make any sense here
 
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I second the meditation suggestion.

I can understand if you come across the word "meditation" and think "ugh..won't work...buncha hoopla bullsnips." i was just the same. then i tried it, and felt like a stress-proof vest. then you start to look at the people around you and feel sorry for em cuz they don't know these methods. I suggest getting the Holosync demo from Centrepointe. google it. Meditation is not an overnight fix, however. Takes effort and committment. all bad words, i know. Trying won't hurt though, so you can't lose.
 
If you want a quick de-stress fix I recommend getting some specialized CD's.

Meditation is great, but not everyone can do it, it takes practice and can even increase stress if you don't start seeing results.

I bought these CD's:
http://www.20minutestolessstress.com

and they work wonders. lie down, they go for 20 mins, they almost always make me fall asleep but wake me up at the end. I feel relaxed, energized, it's great. Highly recommended.
 
birthdaycake said:
but i just dont see the connection as to how exercise can help with stress when it is happening. i mean, i can see having a totally stressful day, and THEN going and exercising and feeling good or whatever, but i dont find how the two connect to benefit me in the actual time and place of stress. maybe im just not getting it?

its not like i am against exercise or anything, but lets be honest here, alot of people (maybe this is more so true in urban/sub-urban america) are so busy with all these things in their lives, that they dont have the time nor energy to exercise. i mean, when i put in a 9 hour day at the job, spend an hour in traffic coming home, etc, the last thing i want to do is go workout or something. id much rather sit down, eat dinner, and watch the football game on tv.

im sorry if i dont make any sense here
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Being physically fit prevents stress from happening. Your body is accustomed to dramatic changes in bloodpressure and heart rate because you put yourself under physical strain daily. The physical reaction that most people get from minor altercations will be different in the bodies of 2 people, 1 who doesn't work out regularly and one who does. When the out of shape person experiences a trivial stress event, their blood pressure elevates, they become stressed out, and it becomes a big event. The fit person will shrug it off because they don't get the same physical reaction.

And I'm sorry but I don't buy your argument. I wake up daily for work at 4am. I put in a full 8 hour shift and then work from home for another 4 hours/day. I still manage to work out 5-6 days a week for 90 minutes.
 
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