Previous evening me and two of my friends, one a male and the other not, ingested lsd, a dose that we figured and expected would cause the desired effect. I have already ingested lsd some times before, and so have they, although only i and my male friend (T) have ingested a dose, powerful enough to collapse reality and bare the ego to the ground.
This happened the last time we have taken the drug, and to be short about it, it was surely the most beautiful, profound and intense happening i have ever gone or will go through. So, after about 3/4 year later we decided it was about time and that we were prepared for another lsd trip, and we also invited a female friend that we can call A, and is quite a close friend of ours. She haven't had an egoloss trip before, and we were a bit sceptic about her ability to handle it.
Anyway, at about 7.30 pm we gathered at my place, me directly from work and an alcohol and drug soaked night before that, firstly paid our attention to making the enviromet as controlled as possible - having enough juice, fruit, hash and junk food, also only the best music that we had at our disposal, and so on. We than took the blotters, thinking that we at least have a slight idea of things to come. The onset came quite fast, probably due to us not eating much that day and really intensive licking of the papers.
The trip became very intense very fast, the soundtrack was some music from pelt and it was heavenly. I started shaking uncontrollably, not really shaking, more a kind of shivering going through the whole of my body, and every wave of it was literally orgasmic, all i could do was lie on the bed and smile uncontrollably, maybe releasing cries of unexpected joy. After a while, 'A' joined me on the bed, the orgasmic shivering was still going on, added with the new sensation of touching another human body, as if touching myself wasn't enough.
Realising, that lsd had us firmly in it's fist, i decided for a little experimenting, putting on a really beautiful, if a bit unstable record, supersilent 6. Soon, all things real started slipping away, i was moaning and moving and crawling on the bed, soon not really knowing which part of the two bodies lost on the bed is mine and which not, still ecstatic but feeling a little tension that the record released into existence. My name slipped away, i lost myself in a confused space of my associations, streaked with colors and sounds. Connecting the dizziness and confusion with the music, i put on kammerflimmer kollektiff, perceiving them to be more gentle with a lost and drifting ego, and they were.
But, alas, a feeling of madness started creeping slowly into the room, 'A' was crawling and moaning on the floor, T was pushing his head into the couch, making weird cries, than toppling down, and I lost myself in this display of unusual behavior, joining into this blue lit chamber of uncontrolled. But it was, it now seems, the last sane mode of the night. 'A' started losing herself, but horrified by that, running around the room, screaming sentences like:who am I, what is this, who are you,...mixed with just plain primordial sound of aaaaa, dbdbdbdbdll. She was extremely scared, finding herself trapped in an unknown body, feeling a sense of heat, drumming on the locked door (the other side contained a rather sane and somber company, so it wasn't wise to actually open the door). When she stated showing breathing problems and still screaming, i realised, something had to be done, so i found my ego again, and started comming her down, worked on that quite some time, but totaly unsuccsesful. In time, i realised it was all actually a psyhedelic show, plastically externalising the decontruction of ego.
I started taking a somewhat humorous approach to the situation, and A did comm down a little bit, just enough to realise the urge to take her clothes down, and escape from herself. We strongly advised her not to do that from respect to our friendship and her having a serious and loveful relationship. It didn't help ofcourse. Slowly, she was moving, almost dancing but still afraid and confused, in her underwear, and her being a very attractive woman, i stopped persuading her to get her clothes on, perceiving it an obviously very primordial urge of her. She than started seducing us (or me, don't know) insisting that we take our clothes of, contemplating her sexual urges, and still not knowing who is she or we, only sometimes briefly memorizing a strange fact of her having a boyfriend, a tough concept when not knowing who she was. What came next was her naked and lush body loudly demanding the need to fuck, and tried to take of my clothes. I gave one last look to T, quietly asking him to excuse me for what am I gonna do, than somehow let myself go and started something that could be called heavy petting, feeling very clumsy with my morphed reality, and still having a feeling of wrongness showing my ass to my best friend.
He really couldn't handle this amount of unconventional behavior, opening the door and running out of the room just when my older brother and his company left their room, probably seeing and hearing some very bizarre stuff. T than run out of the house, leaving everything, including keys for his and mine home and his mobile, while some strange attempt of sex was going on in the room, where from some unknown reason the lights started blinking.
Sex stayed only as an attempt, due to A's constant associations to her beloved boyfriend, and my quickly diminishing lust, frustrated by not finding the remote control for soundtrack operations, and so unable to put on the very special and beautiful record coil - the remote wiever. Also, besides feeling clumsy, i realised the lust was strongly diminished in both of us cause's A contemplating the differences in the way her boyfriend and I are built, also having some wild associations around the concept of Seduction madness' and even trying to play a kind of dominant being, me ofcourse not totaly agreeing with this. So, with time, we just played with each others body, talking about the weirdness of us being in this bizarre situation of naked, still morphing bodies, mentioning a totaly tripping friend lost in the cold outside world.
In time, we got clothed, feeling very, well, bad, while suddenly we heard someone ringing, and yes, it was a very confused T, asking for a fire.
So, the things started comming down, although still intensely moving, and it was about 3 to 4 a clock. For the next few hours, we were tripping very depressed thoughts, staring into nothingness, holding for our heads and scared to look each other in the eyes. With time, sleep came. It didn't last long, maybe an hour or two, ended by the sudden realization, that firstly T and maybe half an hour later A drifted from my world, and that i was now convicted to being the only company for myself, to my confused and incapable head, and than came a sunny day of depression, guilt and a general sense of wrongness and loss of purpose, which will all end in the morning to come, i hope.
It was a very scary, bizarre, strange, weird and painful lsd experience, probably I will never have the opportunity to see such extreme and uncontrolled outbursts of madness, and I am actually glad for it, in a way ofcourse, although the knowledge, that i have probably lost a very good friend is very painful, for it is questionable, if it is possible to have a normal friendship with someone after screaming for him to fuck you, and viceversa, with someone that attacked the integral part of your happiness, your loving relationship.
I am sorry for the poor spelling, choice of words and sentence formation, but i still am a pretty handicapped mind, and also i don't normally write in english. Also, due to the late hour, many interesting or maybe even kinky details were left out, it's late hour and my willpowers dying out...
This happened the last time we have taken the drug, and to be short about it, it was surely the most beautiful, profound and intense happening i have ever gone or will go through. So, after about 3/4 year later we decided it was about time and that we were prepared for another lsd trip, and we also invited a female friend that we can call A, and is quite a close friend of ours. She haven't had an egoloss trip before, and we were a bit sceptic about her ability to handle it.
Anyway, at about 7.30 pm we gathered at my place, me directly from work and an alcohol and drug soaked night before that, firstly paid our attention to making the enviromet as controlled as possible - having enough juice, fruit, hash and junk food, also only the best music that we had at our disposal, and so on. We than took the blotters, thinking that we at least have a slight idea of things to come. The onset came quite fast, probably due to us not eating much that day and really intensive licking of the papers.
The trip became very intense very fast, the soundtrack was some music from pelt and it was heavenly. I started shaking uncontrollably, not really shaking, more a kind of shivering going through the whole of my body, and every wave of it was literally orgasmic, all i could do was lie on the bed and smile uncontrollably, maybe releasing cries of unexpected joy. After a while, 'A' joined me on the bed, the orgasmic shivering was still going on, added with the new sensation of touching another human body, as if touching myself wasn't enough.
Realising, that lsd had us firmly in it's fist, i decided for a little experimenting, putting on a really beautiful, if a bit unstable record, supersilent 6. Soon, all things real started slipping away, i was moaning and moving and crawling on the bed, soon not really knowing which part of the two bodies lost on the bed is mine and which not, still ecstatic but feeling a little tension that the record released into existence. My name slipped away, i lost myself in a confused space of my associations, streaked with colors and sounds. Connecting the dizziness and confusion with the music, i put on kammerflimmer kollektiff, perceiving them to be more gentle with a lost and drifting ego, and they were.
But, alas, a feeling of madness started creeping slowly into the room, 'A' was crawling and moaning on the floor, T was pushing his head into the couch, making weird cries, than toppling down, and I lost myself in this display of unusual behavior, joining into this blue lit chamber of uncontrolled. But it was, it now seems, the last sane mode of the night. 'A' started losing herself, but horrified by that, running around the room, screaming sentences like:who am I, what is this, who are you,...mixed with just plain primordial sound of aaaaa, dbdbdbdbdll. She was extremely scared, finding herself trapped in an unknown body, feeling a sense of heat, drumming on the locked door (the other side contained a rather sane and somber company, so it wasn't wise to actually open the door). When she stated showing breathing problems and still screaming, i realised, something had to be done, so i found my ego again, and started comming her down, worked on that quite some time, but totaly unsuccsesful. In time, i realised it was all actually a psyhedelic show, plastically externalising the decontruction of ego.
I started taking a somewhat humorous approach to the situation, and A did comm down a little bit, just enough to realise the urge to take her clothes down, and escape from herself. We strongly advised her not to do that from respect to our friendship and her having a serious and loveful relationship. It didn't help ofcourse. Slowly, she was moving, almost dancing but still afraid and confused, in her underwear, and her being a very attractive woman, i stopped persuading her to get her clothes on, perceiving it an obviously very primordial urge of her. She than started seducing us (or me, don't know) insisting that we take our clothes of, contemplating her sexual urges, and still not knowing who is she or we, only sometimes briefly memorizing a strange fact of her having a boyfriend, a tough concept when not knowing who she was. What came next was her naked and lush body loudly demanding the need to fuck, and tried to take of my clothes. I gave one last look to T, quietly asking him to excuse me for what am I gonna do, than somehow let myself go and started something that could be called heavy petting, feeling very clumsy with my morphed reality, and still having a feeling of wrongness showing my ass to my best friend.
He really couldn't handle this amount of unconventional behavior, opening the door and running out of the room just when my older brother and his company left their room, probably seeing and hearing some very bizarre stuff. T than run out of the house, leaving everything, including keys for his and mine home and his mobile, while some strange attempt of sex was going on in the room, where from some unknown reason the lights started blinking.
Sex stayed only as an attempt, due to A's constant associations to her beloved boyfriend, and my quickly diminishing lust, frustrated by not finding the remote control for soundtrack operations, and so unable to put on the very special and beautiful record coil - the remote wiever. Also, besides feeling clumsy, i realised the lust was strongly diminished in both of us cause's A contemplating the differences in the way her boyfriend and I are built, also having some wild associations around the concept of Seduction madness' and even trying to play a kind of dominant being, me ofcourse not totaly agreeing with this. So, with time, we just played with each others body, talking about the weirdness of us being in this bizarre situation of naked, still morphing bodies, mentioning a totaly tripping friend lost in the cold outside world.
In time, we got clothed, feeling very, well, bad, while suddenly we heard someone ringing, and yes, it was a very confused T, asking for a fire.
So, the things started comming down, although still intensely moving, and it was about 3 to 4 a clock. For the next few hours, we were tripping very depressed thoughts, staring into nothingness, holding for our heads and scared to look each other in the eyes. With time, sleep came. It didn't last long, maybe an hour or two, ended by the sudden realization, that firstly T and maybe half an hour later A drifted from my world, and that i was now convicted to being the only company for myself, to my confused and incapable head, and than came a sunny day of depression, guilt and a general sense of wrongness and loss of purpose, which will all end in the morning to come, i hope.
It was a very scary, bizarre, strange, weird and painful lsd experience, probably I will never have the opportunity to see such extreme and uncontrolled outbursts of madness, and I am actually glad for it, in a way ofcourse, although the knowledge, that i have probably lost a very good friend is very painful, for it is questionable, if it is possible to have a normal friendship with someone after screaming for him to fuck you, and viceversa, with someone that attacked the integral part of your happiness, your loving relationship.
I am sorry for the poor spelling, choice of words and sentence formation, but i still am a pretty handicapped mind, and also i don't normally write in english. Also, due to the late hour, many interesting or maybe even kinky details were left out, it's late hour and my willpowers dying out...
