Didgital
Bluelight Crew
So before I get into the story, this is my 2nd lysergamide thumbprint if you will, my first was with AL-LAD. I've taken LSD hundreds of times before, but nothing like this has ever happened.
In this case it all started when I was filling a vial of liquid LSD. I overfilled it and even though I was wearing gloves I stupidly decided I didn't want to waste even a few drops so I licked the outside of the bottle. Well that got out of hand way quicker than I imagined, so I decided to stop working. My roommate tells me that I told him, that I also licked a tiny bit of crystal. I don't remember that, apparently just licking the vial was enough to put me in a blackout which I've never experienced with LSD up to 1200 mics. I also don't remember the first 2 days which I am told I spent most of on the living room floor writhing and laughing.
Day 1-2: Very little memory of it.
Day 3: I started to come out of what I now call the heavy phase. It was indescribable. One of the first things that I do remember is my roommate asking me if he could try the LSD. I was still having visuals that would maybe be equivalent to 1mg, but also there wasn't any of the time distortion that can occur on larger doses. I said "look, I think this is a bad idea" but he was rather insistent and I was still tripping balls and not thinking super clearly. I was more in trauma mode. So I agreed. I forget actual order of things but for the sake of the story, I'll say right after he took it, His girlfriend comes over with an unknown girl that was having her own psychotic breakdown. She basically invades my roommates room, breaks up with him in the worst way calling him a rapist etc. I don't really put much stock in what she said, I have seen this girl so high on ketamine that she does not know which way is up countless times. So yeah, my bad trip got a lot worse. I basically took my roommate into my room and had to hold him for 3 hours while we watched movies and tried to chill. I don't know if it was the energy or if I accidentally re exposed myself, but I was getting higher and higher. Here was another mistake too.. after the roommate leaves my room, I just felt all the negativity of the whole situation, and I wanted to relax so I took a small amount of MDMA, maybe 50mg. I kind of regret it because as the days wore on, I needed all the serotonin possible and there were moments later in my LSD trip that I was wracked with anxiety. Had I not taken MDMA, i don't think these instances would have been so unbearable. I still didn't sleep that night.
Day 4: The girls leave and roommates friend came over and sat and talked with him for several hours which was great because I was still tripping, hadn't slept yet, and I just didn't know how to make the situation any better. So at that point he is feeling a bit better. I know I called and talked to a lot of people, but I barely remember having most conversations. Up until this point, it was very much like a dreamstate. My memory is very very hazy at this point.
Day 5: I am starting to feel a little bit better? Maybe this is light at the end of the tunnel? I end up taking roommate to the airport and I also started taking care of my neighbors dogs which turned out to be a god send. They no longer bark and I spent many hours just chilling with the dogs. I got back home and did kind of a deep clean of the house just in case i was reexposing myself. This evening I have a girlfriend over and we have a really good night. And we took a tiny of MDMA again. I was able to fall asleep, but it wasn't the deepest rest. Memory still seems terrible and I can't form new memories very well.
Day 6: I wake up and god damnit, not only am I tripping, I seem to be tripping harder. This was maybe the worst day. Crippled with anxiety over several things going on in my life, and I also started to have the thought, that I would be like this forever. At some point I took a little bit of mitragynine pseudoindoxyl which is an oxidized kratom compound which deserves its own Trip Report, because it's very rare... Felt better for a while but as it wore off the panic came back. I decided i should go get some booze. Got a few beers and shooters, got drunk and fell asleep after getting some mexican food. I had barely eaten anything up to this point I just didn't have much of an appetite. I'm starting to be able to form memories better.
Day 7: I wake up, and I'm STILL tripping, though it seems like less intensely. I end up chilling most of the day, but in the evening I went out and got a 12 pack of imperial IPA and got hammered. Was trying to knock myself out essentially. As I was slamming these beers I started tripping again very strongly. Instead of being terribly worried, I was more resigned at this point. This is when I started to notice my body just become more and more tense. A female entity that was reminiscent of an anime character appeared to me floating. She was hovering over me guiding me where to touch myself. This was not in a sexual way this was self massage. I should state here, for significant portions of my 7 day trip, I was also experiencing difficulty regulating my body temperature. I would break out sweating in a normal temperature. I finally passed out.
Day 8: Thank god, this nightmare is finally over. I woke up, I am super hungover, quite a bit shaky, but I've realized the LSD is truly gone, and that I didn't ruin my life/have permanent psychosis. After day 5 I had really started wondering. Today is still day 8. I'm a little mentally fragile, but I figured my memory of the event is probably the freshest its going to be so I might as well write up the TR. Here is one other thing though. I had bruises appear on random spots of my body overnight apparently. I'm hoping they resolve soon, but it was very strange. It hurts to even type on a laptop. There is a lot more I could say, but I'm also quite exhausted. I may come back and edit the post at some point. I may want to change the name of the report, because it wasn't all hell. I just didn't know if it was going to end.
I'm just glad this is over. It was totally unnecessary, especially as I have had so many mega doses already. Was not worth all the stress. I do wonder how much of the experience was psychosis, but I felt the LSD in my system until I woke up on day 8.
Some additional afterthoughts:
"Will not repeat"
"This time, I didn't do it alone, so I avoided at least one of the previous mistakes I'd made with megadoses. That was my biggest mistake my first time. I still acted way too spontaneously and that can be a character defect of mine for sure."
Here is my original AL-LAD TR: https://www.bluelight.org/community/threads/al-lad-experienced-al-lad-thumbprint.847901/
"I don't know my actual dose of AL-LAD, but it was very likely over 5mg, I doubt if I took 5 mg of LSD, that seems high. If I touched the crystal, it was a very tiny amount, a few mg at most"
"Day 9: I feel pretty much normal, ive slept, ive eaten, the strange bruising and soreness is lessening."
In this case it all started when I was filling a vial of liquid LSD. I overfilled it and even though I was wearing gloves I stupidly decided I didn't want to waste even a few drops so I licked the outside of the bottle. Well that got out of hand way quicker than I imagined, so I decided to stop working. My roommate tells me that I told him, that I also licked a tiny bit of crystal. I don't remember that, apparently just licking the vial was enough to put me in a blackout which I've never experienced with LSD up to 1200 mics. I also don't remember the first 2 days which I am told I spent most of on the living room floor writhing and laughing.
Day 1-2: Very little memory of it.
Day 3: I started to come out of what I now call the heavy phase. It was indescribable. One of the first things that I do remember is my roommate asking me if he could try the LSD. I was still having visuals that would maybe be equivalent to 1mg, but also there wasn't any of the time distortion that can occur on larger doses. I said "look, I think this is a bad idea" but he was rather insistent and I was still tripping balls and not thinking super clearly. I was more in trauma mode. So I agreed. I forget actual order of things but for the sake of the story, I'll say right after he took it, His girlfriend comes over with an unknown girl that was having her own psychotic breakdown. She basically invades my roommates room, breaks up with him in the worst way calling him a rapist etc. I don't really put much stock in what she said, I have seen this girl so high on ketamine that she does not know which way is up countless times. So yeah, my bad trip got a lot worse. I basically took my roommate into my room and had to hold him for 3 hours while we watched movies and tried to chill. I don't know if it was the energy or if I accidentally re exposed myself, but I was getting higher and higher. Here was another mistake too.. after the roommate leaves my room, I just felt all the negativity of the whole situation, and I wanted to relax so I took a small amount of MDMA, maybe 50mg. I kind of regret it because as the days wore on, I needed all the serotonin possible and there were moments later in my LSD trip that I was wracked with anxiety. Had I not taken MDMA, i don't think these instances would have been so unbearable. I still didn't sleep that night.
Day 4: The girls leave and roommates friend came over and sat and talked with him for several hours which was great because I was still tripping, hadn't slept yet, and I just didn't know how to make the situation any better. So at that point he is feeling a bit better. I know I called and talked to a lot of people, but I barely remember having most conversations. Up until this point, it was very much like a dreamstate. My memory is very very hazy at this point.
Day 5: I am starting to feel a little bit better? Maybe this is light at the end of the tunnel? I end up taking roommate to the airport and I also started taking care of my neighbors dogs which turned out to be a god send. They no longer bark and I spent many hours just chilling with the dogs. I got back home and did kind of a deep clean of the house just in case i was reexposing myself. This evening I have a girlfriend over and we have a really good night. And we took a tiny of MDMA again. I was able to fall asleep, but it wasn't the deepest rest. Memory still seems terrible and I can't form new memories very well.
Day 6: I wake up and god damnit, not only am I tripping, I seem to be tripping harder. This was maybe the worst day. Crippled with anxiety over several things going on in my life, and I also started to have the thought, that I would be like this forever. At some point I took a little bit of mitragynine pseudoindoxyl which is an oxidized kratom compound which deserves its own Trip Report, because it's very rare... Felt better for a while but as it wore off the panic came back. I decided i should go get some booze. Got a few beers and shooters, got drunk and fell asleep after getting some mexican food. I had barely eaten anything up to this point I just didn't have much of an appetite. I'm starting to be able to form memories better.
Day 7: I wake up, and I'm STILL tripping, though it seems like less intensely. I end up chilling most of the day, but in the evening I went out and got a 12 pack of imperial IPA and got hammered. Was trying to knock myself out essentially. As I was slamming these beers I started tripping again very strongly. Instead of being terribly worried, I was more resigned at this point. This is when I started to notice my body just become more and more tense. A female entity that was reminiscent of an anime character appeared to me floating. She was hovering over me guiding me where to touch myself. This was not in a sexual way this was self massage. I should state here, for significant portions of my 7 day trip, I was also experiencing difficulty regulating my body temperature. I would break out sweating in a normal temperature. I finally passed out.
Day 8: Thank god, this nightmare is finally over. I woke up, I am super hungover, quite a bit shaky, but I've realized the LSD is truly gone, and that I didn't ruin my life/have permanent psychosis. After day 5 I had really started wondering. Today is still day 8. I'm a little mentally fragile, but I figured my memory of the event is probably the freshest its going to be so I might as well write up the TR. Here is one other thing though. I had bruises appear on random spots of my body overnight apparently. I'm hoping they resolve soon, but it was very strange. It hurts to even type on a laptop. There is a lot more I could say, but I'm also quite exhausted. I may come back and edit the post at some point. I may want to change the name of the report, because it wasn't all hell. I just didn't know if it was going to end.
I'm just glad this is over. It was totally unnecessary, especially as I have had so many mega doses already. Was not worth all the stress. I do wonder how much of the experience was psychosis, but I felt the LSD in my system until I woke up on day 8.
Some additional afterthoughts:
"Will not repeat"
"This time, I didn't do it alone, so I avoided at least one of the previous mistakes I'd made with megadoses. That was my biggest mistake my first time. I still acted way too spontaneously and that can be a character defect of mine for sure."
Here is my original AL-LAD TR: https://www.bluelight.org/community/threads/al-lad-experienced-al-lad-thumbprint.847901/
"I don't know my actual dose of AL-LAD, but it was very likely over 5mg, I doubt if I took 5 mg of LSD, that seems high. If I touched the crystal, it was a very tiny amount, a few mg at most"
"Day 9: I feel pretty much normal, ive slept, ive eaten, the strange bruising and soreness is lessening."
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