mashead testing
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Mar 18, 2001
- Messages
- 12,030
My previous drug experiences include lot of MD**, Cannabis and Amphetamines alongside some use of psychedelics like AMT, 2CB and LSD. In the past couple of months I have tripped again 3 times, the previous trip was my strongest yet two weeks before this one and since I had had that trip a lot of things in my life had become more positive so I was looking forward to doing LSD again.
The night before I had had a great time at a club where I had danced from 11pm - 5.45am and used a small amount of amphetamine. I slept for some of the day. I had always thought of tripping that night in the back of my mind, it was either going to be that night or the night after but I after a lot of thought I decided that night was probably the best I had the most time to recover after.
My mind set was quite fun, I had a lot of positive thoughts about the future in my head and was already in quite a silly mood.
I did one blotter of "purple ohm" at about 9pm, I had taken purples ohm's two weeks before and been very impressed with them, the trip I had had previously was a lot stronger than any acid (and possibly any other drugs) I have ever experienced.
I played on my decks in my room for the next hour or so although I wasnt having a good day and got quite frustrated as I didnt seem to be able to bring the beats together as well I have been lately.
I then came back to the computer and talked to a couple of people online whilst listening to a freddy fresh tape, it is one of my favourite tapes and makes me smile and dance lots sober as the acid started to work this was definitely accenuated and I danced about in the Kitchen with the tape on whilst getting a beer out of the fridge. While I was doing this my phone had rung but I didnt get there in time, a few minutes later the caller called again, they wanted to ask me about some pills they were about to buy to see if I knew if they were any good, I didnt think they were very good but I was already starting to get lost in the acid so it was quite funny having a conversation.
For the next hour or so I giggled lots at the computer and stuff started to change, my phone flashed and my perception of things totally changed although it didn't seem as strong as the last time I did it but I couldnt stop laughing at everything. I decided I wanted to take the other blotter so I went uptstairs and got it, this is most of the conversation I had between just before taking the second blotter and leaving the comouter.
During the next hour and a bit the trip really and took a hold of me and was incredibly strong as you can probably read from the above link, I kept getting totally lost in my thoughts and everything disolved into a psychedelic mess. I have encountered melting before on psychedelic drugs but never before to this level, it was as though everything was dripping away and gradually reality disintegrated.
It was a lot of fun at this point although the effects seemed to getting stronger and stronger until I was definitely in a place I have never been to before, in a way it was a little scary but every few seconds something in reality would hit me before the whole melting process would start again. After a while everything became very animated and digital as though I was in a film or cartoon. As I typed words into the keyboard they would jump onto the screen and appear very strange, when deleting typing errors it was as though I was rewinding.
Soon the thought of rewinding took over me and it was like the world was going forward then hitting a point of melting and it would stop and then rewind a bit and then start again, a very common theme was things starting again and I got into the pattern of having thoughts which would make lots of sense then totally disolve into more thoughts until it evaporated then it would rewind and start again.
I kept realising everything made sense and every thought I had ever had seemed to work in sync with every other thought leading me to realise that everything makes sense. I remembered working on a website for a club when one of their DJ's came in and mentioned something about some crazy acid he had taken and I knew it would most likely be the same acid, this then made me remember the cd I have that this dj made called acid brain fodder which seemed very relevent now, infact everything seemed relevent to everything.
After someone else came online I tried to copy and paste stuff from one conversation to another to show them what had been happening and then back again although this got me very lost and by doing this my font changed, when my font changed to the same as one of people I was talking to I thought I had become her and got very confused.
I was definitely getting very lost in my head and kept thinking it probably wasnt the best state to be sat in my dining room in when someone could walk in on me, after I lost control of the mouse and it seemed like air had become very thick I decided I would go to my room, as I stood up to leave the computer it was as though I stepped out of a picture and everything else was still.#
I needed some water so I emptied the beer out of my glass and filled it with water, then went to turn the fire off, as I flicked the off switch the buttons melted into my hand, I then unplugged the computer from the internet and shut it down and went to the toilet, again it seemed as though I had taken a huge step out of everything around me.
I had to be very careful going upstairs, I would normally do this in the dark but decided it had to be done with the lights on so I wouldnt wake anyone by getting lost in the darkness, I flipped lights on and then off with incredible precision and managed to get to my bedroom. I undressed and realised I was sweating very badly before getting into my bed. At first I put the television on but then I decided I didnt want it on and turned the lights of and laid in my bed.
This is the point where everything started to disappear, my body melted into the bed until I could very vaguely work out what was actually me and what was the bed.
I laid back and let my thoughts take me, at first I was a bit scared to let go but I kept telling myself it would all be ok and just to let the trip take me where it wanted to.
I had a running commentary of what was going on in my head told by myself although I kept wondering if this was actually me speaking outloud. Soon my thoughts totally took over me and everything disappeared from around me until I got to the point where every thought that came into my head would be deconstructed and divided until it became nothing, when the thoughts became nothing everything would speed up and it felt like everything was spinning around me and looking at me and then something would hit me then it was as though it rewound and then started again.
I found this quite interesting although at times it got too much, I wondered if this was a good or bad trip but I knew that whatever it was it was going to teach me lots, thoughts of LSD and what I had read about it came into my head, things such as ego loss and reality. I kept thinking that the trip was reality and that how I am normally was actually a trip because some of the thoughts I was getting are quite similar to the thoughts I have a lot of the time, in a way this is very true and I used to write a lot of stories and create worlds within my head which to me now seemed to be very alike to things on acid. Actually thinking about the thought that this was no reality made me quite confused.
It seemed as though a lot of my recent thoughts were all coming together and everything I had been thinking seemed to make sense, the people I had seen in the past few weeks all seemed to serve a purpose and I decided that a lot of people I had seen recently had definitely either been on acid when i saw them or had taken the drug to these levels before so they would understand me and this and that this was meant to happen.
My thoughts were still coming thick and fast and I think I totally let myself go, it felt as though I was a psychedelic blob going on a journey through the whole universe at top speed but every now and again it would stop then appear to look at me before laughing and then start again.
I was throughly enjoying the trip for most of the duration and although at times it did get a bit repetative, I think I learnt to control it. I was lost in a psychedelic dreamscape where parts of my life would flash infront of me and give me messages about how to change things, I think I was gaining a lot from the trip although actually looking back I can't remember as much of it as I would like.
Probably the most incredible thing that happened was when time kept rewinding itself, it started to feel as though I was a record and a lot of the trip was soundtracked by the specials song "ghost town" which I had been playing just after I had taken the acid, probably the most unbelievable thing that has ever happened to me happened when I thought I had become that record and a DJ (possibly) myself was scratching with it.
I had never reached a state of conciousness quite like this before and started to wonder what it would be like to live like this all the time and indeed if anyone did that thought really interested me as I kept wondering if people I had talked to in the past were actually like this all the time.
I was incredibly lost in all my thoughts which then lost the thoughts of thoughts before shattering that thought only for all the thoughts of my thoughts being shattered to be sucked up into a void in which my thoughts were deconstructed until they were mere fractals of thoughts that were somehow thrown together at hyperspeed then spat in my face.
My physical self has totally gone and I was struggling with my bed, the three pillows I had seemed to be very different and I kept getting my hands lost between them, everything seemed rather big and I could only lay in two positions, on my back for a short period of time or on my side but not facing the wall, my body wouldnt twist into a postion so I could be on the other side no matter how hard I tried.
Everything was still in technicolour and my thoughts kept going in the same pattern, I wish I could remember more of them but I can't. I think the whole idea of ego loss fascinated me although I started to wonder if stuff would ever be the same, I decided if it wasnt it was probably for the better anyway. As I seemed to be learning lots about myself.
This went on for hours and hours and my bed was still feeling very strange to be in, I actually thought of myself as part of a club I had been in the night previously and my pillows and bed were like walls, its very hard to describe what that felt like.
This carried on and on for quite a few hours until maybe around 6am when I suddenly started to feel a little less unreal, I exchanged messages with a friend on my phone and then decided it would be a good idea to put into my phone some of my thoughts to save and send them to other people aswell.
Here are a couple of the things I had saved:
The night before I had had a great time at a club where I had danced from 11pm - 5.45am and used a small amount of amphetamine. I slept for some of the day. I had always thought of tripping that night in the back of my mind, it was either going to be that night or the night after but I after a lot of thought I decided that night was probably the best I had the most time to recover after.
My mind set was quite fun, I had a lot of positive thoughts about the future in my head and was already in quite a silly mood.
I did one blotter of "purple ohm" at about 9pm, I had taken purples ohm's two weeks before and been very impressed with them, the trip I had had previously was a lot stronger than any acid (and possibly any other drugs) I have ever experienced.
I played on my decks in my room for the next hour or so although I wasnt having a good day and got quite frustrated as I didnt seem to be able to bring the beats together as well I have been lately.
I then came back to the computer and talked to a couple of people online whilst listening to a freddy fresh tape, it is one of my favourite tapes and makes me smile and dance lots sober as the acid started to work this was definitely accenuated and I danced about in the Kitchen with the tape on whilst getting a beer out of the fridge. While I was doing this my phone had rung but I didnt get there in time, a few minutes later the caller called again, they wanted to ask me about some pills they were about to buy to see if I knew if they were any good, I didnt think they were very good but I was already starting to get lost in the acid so it was quite funny having a conversation.
For the next hour or so I giggled lots at the computer and stuff started to change, my phone flashed and my perception of things totally changed although it didn't seem as strong as the last time I did it but I couldnt stop laughing at everything. I decided I wanted to take the other blotter so I went uptstairs and got it, this is most of the conversation I had between just before taking the second blotter and leaving the comouter.
During the next hour and a bit the trip really and took a hold of me and was incredibly strong as you can probably read from the above link, I kept getting totally lost in my thoughts and everything disolved into a psychedelic mess. I have encountered melting before on psychedelic drugs but never before to this level, it was as though everything was dripping away and gradually reality disintegrated.
It was a lot of fun at this point although the effects seemed to getting stronger and stronger until I was definitely in a place I have never been to before, in a way it was a little scary but every few seconds something in reality would hit me before the whole melting process would start again. After a while everything became very animated and digital as though I was in a film or cartoon. As I typed words into the keyboard they would jump onto the screen and appear very strange, when deleting typing errors it was as though I was rewinding.
Soon the thought of rewinding took over me and it was like the world was going forward then hitting a point of melting and it would stop and then rewind a bit and then start again, a very common theme was things starting again and I got into the pattern of having thoughts which would make lots of sense then totally disolve into more thoughts until it evaporated then it would rewind and start again.
I kept realising everything made sense and every thought I had ever had seemed to work in sync with every other thought leading me to realise that everything makes sense. I remembered working on a website for a club when one of their DJ's came in and mentioned something about some crazy acid he had taken and I knew it would most likely be the same acid, this then made me remember the cd I have that this dj made called acid brain fodder which seemed very relevent now, infact everything seemed relevent to everything.
After someone else came online I tried to copy and paste stuff from one conversation to another to show them what had been happening and then back again although this got me very lost and by doing this my font changed, when my font changed to the same as one of people I was talking to I thought I had become her and got very confused.
I was definitely getting very lost in my head and kept thinking it probably wasnt the best state to be sat in my dining room in when someone could walk in on me, after I lost control of the mouse and it seemed like air had become very thick I decided I would go to my room, as I stood up to leave the computer it was as though I stepped out of a picture and everything else was still.#
I needed some water so I emptied the beer out of my glass and filled it with water, then went to turn the fire off, as I flicked the off switch the buttons melted into my hand, I then unplugged the computer from the internet and shut it down and went to the toilet, again it seemed as though I had taken a huge step out of everything around me.
I had to be very careful going upstairs, I would normally do this in the dark but decided it had to be done with the lights on so I wouldnt wake anyone by getting lost in the darkness, I flipped lights on and then off with incredible precision and managed to get to my bedroom. I undressed and realised I was sweating very badly before getting into my bed. At first I put the television on but then I decided I didnt want it on and turned the lights of and laid in my bed.
This is the point where everything started to disappear, my body melted into the bed until I could very vaguely work out what was actually me and what was the bed.
I laid back and let my thoughts take me, at first I was a bit scared to let go but I kept telling myself it would all be ok and just to let the trip take me where it wanted to.
I had a running commentary of what was going on in my head told by myself although I kept wondering if this was actually me speaking outloud. Soon my thoughts totally took over me and everything disappeared from around me until I got to the point where every thought that came into my head would be deconstructed and divided until it became nothing, when the thoughts became nothing everything would speed up and it felt like everything was spinning around me and looking at me and then something would hit me then it was as though it rewound and then started again.
I found this quite interesting although at times it got too much, I wondered if this was a good or bad trip but I knew that whatever it was it was going to teach me lots, thoughts of LSD and what I had read about it came into my head, things such as ego loss and reality. I kept thinking that the trip was reality and that how I am normally was actually a trip because some of the thoughts I was getting are quite similar to the thoughts I have a lot of the time, in a way this is very true and I used to write a lot of stories and create worlds within my head which to me now seemed to be very alike to things on acid. Actually thinking about the thought that this was no reality made me quite confused.
It seemed as though a lot of my recent thoughts were all coming together and everything I had been thinking seemed to make sense, the people I had seen in the past few weeks all seemed to serve a purpose and I decided that a lot of people I had seen recently had definitely either been on acid when i saw them or had taken the drug to these levels before so they would understand me and this and that this was meant to happen.
My thoughts were still coming thick and fast and I think I totally let myself go, it felt as though I was a psychedelic blob going on a journey through the whole universe at top speed but every now and again it would stop then appear to look at me before laughing and then start again.
I was throughly enjoying the trip for most of the duration and although at times it did get a bit repetative, I think I learnt to control it. I was lost in a psychedelic dreamscape where parts of my life would flash infront of me and give me messages about how to change things, I think I was gaining a lot from the trip although actually looking back I can't remember as much of it as I would like.
Probably the most incredible thing that happened was when time kept rewinding itself, it started to feel as though I was a record and a lot of the trip was soundtracked by the specials song "ghost town" which I had been playing just after I had taken the acid, probably the most unbelievable thing that has ever happened to me happened when I thought I had become that record and a DJ (possibly) myself was scratching with it.
I had never reached a state of conciousness quite like this before and started to wonder what it would be like to live like this all the time and indeed if anyone did that thought really interested me as I kept wondering if people I had talked to in the past were actually like this all the time.
I was incredibly lost in all my thoughts which then lost the thoughts of thoughts before shattering that thought only for all the thoughts of my thoughts being shattered to be sucked up into a void in which my thoughts were deconstructed until they were mere fractals of thoughts that were somehow thrown together at hyperspeed then spat in my face.
My physical self has totally gone and I was struggling with my bed, the three pillows I had seemed to be very different and I kept getting my hands lost between them, everything seemed rather big and I could only lay in two positions, on my back for a short period of time or on my side but not facing the wall, my body wouldnt twist into a postion so I could be on the other side no matter how hard I tried.
Everything was still in technicolour and my thoughts kept going in the same pattern, I wish I could remember more of them but I can't. I think the whole idea of ego loss fascinated me although I started to wonder if stuff would ever be the same, I decided if it wasnt it was probably for the better anyway. As I seemed to be learning lots about myself.
This went on for hours and hours and my bed was still feeling very strange to be in, I actually thought of myself as part of a club I had been in the night previously and my pillows and bed were like walls, its very hard to describe what that felt like.
This carried on and on for quite a few hours until maybe around 6am when I suddenly started to feel a little less unreal, I exchanged messages with a friend on my phone and then decided it would be a good idea to put into my phone some of my thoughts to save and send them to other people aswell.
Here are a couple of the things I had saved:
all my memories and thoughts span round into each other only to stop and look at me and laugh and then start again.. and its still happening
I never thought my whole world could be made into a 7 inch of the specials ghost town and then played infront of me by myself with scratching
they shouldnt be allowed to put all your memories, insecurities and existence into a bowl and mix it up then play it back live before your eyes
im still putting pieces of my brain back together really slowly after my body spat them out, mixed them up and then said fuck u only to giggle and walk away
After about 6am I realised that if I concentrated enough I could feel fairly sober and I managed to get out of bed and to to the toilet quite easily, I then laid in bed exchanging messages on my phone with a friend and thinking about what had happened.
At about 8.30am my parents had gone out so I came online, my main reason was to see what had actually gone on in the conversation which I knew I had saved although I was very scared to read it as I didnt want to get lost in it again as I remembered that happening, it took me a couple of hours to gain the courage to read it although when I did it wasnt as bad as I thought.
I was in a bit of a shocked state after encountering what I had, I was not really prepared for what had happened but I definitely think I handled it quite well and enjoyed it a lot.
I still found it quite hard to work out how to use my fingers and my body seemed quite stiff, this was at 9am. I tried to reflect on everything that had happened and it seemed a lot.
After a couple of hours I managed to go to sleep and woke up at about 5pm today.
I feel happy now and im still laughing at what has happened and in awe of the possibilities of thoughts that I have had and what happened last night, I definitely think what happened had to happen and even though at times it did seem a little too much it was a very good trip overall.
Thanks for reading this
[ 29 December 2002: Message edited by: mashead testing ]