breadhater
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Jun 10, 2014
- Messages
- 1
i took lsd for the first time on saturday. 3 hits, approximately 100ug each. i weigh 100 lbs and have no previous experience with psychedelics. i was tripping with my boyfriend, who took 1.5 tabs as well.
the good:
we dropped the tabs as we left the house. the effects came on very quickly -- within 25 or 30 minutes. i was overcome with a desire to laugh, my body felt light, and i had an odd feeling of restlessness. while we were waiting for the bus, i could see patterns forming on the sidewalk, turning into blue and red afterimages, then fading away. as we travelled through suburbs and strip malls on the bus, the colours seemed incredibly bright and everything looked beautiful and exotic. i felt like i was travelling through a neon jungle. everything seemed to have a wild, "african" character.
we reached the forest. the visuals and body high were quite intense now. i described the body high as feeling like i was moving through several dimensions at once. music sounded great. when i looked at the grass and trees it seemed as if i was looking at a 3d tv without 3d glasses -- everything was offset with blue and red shadows. the jungle-like quality of everything was still there. i can recall being amazed by ferns. i saw white light moving through the leaves of trees in waves. there were faint fractals in the sky. i was laughing, and tears were rolling down my face, creating a pleasurable tingling feeling.
we walked to a meadow at the top of a hill and set our blankets and pillows down underneath a big tree. this is when i started tripping really, really hard, and my experiences from this point on are a bit difficult to remember.
i could see rainbow mandelbrot fractals streaming off each leaf of the tree and into the sky. when i closed my eyes, i saw the same fractals regressing infinitely into themselves. the colours of the trees and grass were impossibly beautiful. everything seemed wavy and cartoonish. my boyfriend put on some jazz and it felt like the perfect music for the moment.
i was overcome with an intense, pulsating, constantly mounting feeling of euphoria, which drove me to roll around on the ground, crying and laughing in pleasure. i can remember thinking that it felt like everything was constantly being multiplied by ten thousand. this was by far the most intense experience of my life...
i asked, bewildered, "how can a drug do this??? how does it keep getting better??? everything is just... more!" i wondered why there were so many other words for elements of the lsd experience but no word for this particular feeling. i had another strange feeling, the conviction that this experience was new and foreign but that at the same time it had been exactly what i had been expecting. hard to describe.
my boyfriend's face was constantly shifting and morphing. he seemed to me like some kind of acid shaman, and when we spoke to each other it felt as if we were sharing a much deeper and more profound form of communication than was possible without lsd (although i was just saying stuff like "IT"S SO GOOD!! HOW IS IT SO GOOD!!" and he was laughing and telling me i was tripping balls).
this state of euphoria began an hour or so after the acid was consumed and lasted for at least two hours.
the bad:
eventually, i got up to piss. at this point, i had been hearing the same bird call very clearly, over and over, and the music seemed to be repeating itself. i pissed, but then immediately forgot that i had pissed, and kept trying to do it again.
whenever i tried, it seemed that the world would orchestrate distractions for me. i would become incredibly aware of bugs landing on me, or get distracted by visuals, or see fragments of people that were not there -- or my boyfriend would come over because i had been sitting there for 20 minutes and he was worried about me. there was a very intentional character to all this, as if some force of nature was conspiring to keep me from pissing.
my boyfriend came over again and again and i kept telling him to go away because i couldn't piss in front of him. my memory gets extremely fragmented at this point. because of the bird calls, the repeating music, and my perceived inability to piss, i began to believe that time was repeating itself and that the only way to get out of the loop would be to piss, change the music, and do something else that i forget.
i kept asking for the time, but i couldn't keep track of it, so i believed that we were skipping backwards and forwards in time. it seemed like whenever i asked for the time, it was almost 1 pm, and i believed that it would never actually be 1 pm. (this was about five hours into the trip). my thought process at this time was very strange and associative and i associated 1 pm with the concept of "oneness", 2 pm with the concept of duality and the two of us, 3 pm with the 3 things that i needed to do to escape. i was going on and on about this shit as well as something about finding the average between these numbers and how the average is equal to normal, sober experience, while drug trips and mental illness are statistical outliers (?).
i believed that i'd be able to stop tripping at 3 pm but i didn't think that 3 pm would come. i wasn't able to communicate to my boyfriend that i felt stuck in time. i just kept talking about the numbers and the average. i also believed that my boyfriend had direct access to my mind and i tried to talk to him about very subjective aspects of my experience, becoming extremely frustrated when he didn't understand me.
we changed the music. the lyrics of various songs seemed to be directly related to my immediate experience and to things that had happened before we started tripping. the latter was very disturbing to me because it made me believe that those things were part of the acid trip as well. the new music did nothing to change my perception of time. i kept hearing the bird calls. at one point i spit in my boyfriend's face because i thought that if i did something crazy i might be able to break out of the loop. he was crying and i thought he was crying because he knew we were trapped here too... his face was constantly morphing and he would shift from looking like a baby to an old man to a woman, from looking beautiful to looking incredibly ugly... i can't remember too much from this stage.
finally it was 3 pm and i suddenly understood that time had stopped looping. the visuals were far less prominent at this stage; i still had the weird associative headspace, though not as strongly. i wasn't entirely sure that i was coming down for a while. we walked home. at this point i could hardly remember anything from the later stages of the trip. i wondered why my boyfriend was acting strangely towards me and didn't realize why until he recounted what i had done. the memories have been coming back to me bit by bit and over the past few days i've been able to put it back together.
back at the house, i could see the ceiling moving in intricate patterns and some faint shifting patterns on fabrics. talking coherently was a bit hard. these effects continued until about 10 hours post-acid consumption. we eventually took some benzos and went to sleep.
reflections:
i experienced an odd aftereffect the next day: total appetite suppression. i had eaten nothing since friday evening and had no desire to eat until late sunday night. food seemed revolting. there were no other residual effects.
i'd like to experience lsd again... but not for a while and definitely at a lower dose.
the good:
we dropped the tabs as we left the house. the effects came on very quickly -- within 25 or 30 minutes. i was overcome with a desire to laugh, my body felt light, and i had an odd feeling of restlessness. while we were waiting for the bus, i could see patterns forming on the sidewalk, turning into blue and red afterimages, then fading away. as we travelled through suburbs and strip malls on the bus, the colours seemed incredibly bright and everything looked beautiful and exotic. i felt like i was travelling through a neon jungle. everything seemed to have a wild, "african" character.
we reached the forest. the visuals and body high were quite intense now. i described the body high as feeling like i was moving through several dimensions at once. music sounded great. when i looked at the grass and trees it seemed as if i was looking at a 3d tv without 3d glasses -- everything was offset with blue and red shadows. the jungle-like quality of everything was still there. i can recall being amazed by ferns. i saw white light moving through the leaves of trees in waves. there were faint fractals in the sky. i was laughing, and tears were rolling down my face, creating a pleasurable tingling feeling.
we walked to a meadow at the top of a hill and set our blankets and pillows down underneath a big tree. this is when i started tripping really, really hard, and my experiences from this point on are a bit difficult to remember.
i could see rainbow mandelbrot fractals streaming off each leaf of the tree and into the sky. when i closed my eyes, i saw the same fractals regressing infinitely into themselves. the colours of the trees and grass were impossibly beautiful. everything seemed wavy and cartoonish. my boyfriend put on some jazz and it felt like the perfect music for the moment.
i was overcome with an intense, pulsating, constantly mounting feeling of euphoria, which drove me to roll around on the ground, crying and laughing in pleasure. i can remember thinking that it felt like everything was constantly being multiplied by ten thousand. this was by far the most intense experience of my life...
i asked, bewildered, "how can a drug do this??? how does it keep getting better??? everything is just... more!" i wondered why there were so many other words for elements of the lsd experience but no word for this particular feeling. i had another strange feeling, the conviction that this experience was new and foreign but that at the same time it had been exactly what i had been expecting. hard to describe.
my boyfriend's face was constantly shifting and morphing. he seemed to me like some kind of acid shaman, and when we spoke to each other it felt as if we were sharing a much deeper and more profound form of communication than was possible without lsd (although i was just saying stuff like "IT"S SO GOOD!! HOW IS IT SO GOOD!!" and he was laughing and telling me i was tripping balls).
this state of euphoria began an hour or so after the acid was consumed and lasted for at least two hours.
the bad:
eventually, i got up to piss. at this point, i had been hearing the same bird call very clearly, over and over, and the music seemed to be repeating itself. i pissed, but then immediately forgot that i had pissed, and kept trying to do it again.
whenever i tried, it seemed that the world would orchestrate distractions for me. i would become incredibly aware of bugs landing on me, or get distracted by visuals, or see fragments of people that were not there -- or my boyfriend would come over because i had been sitting there for 20 minutes and he was worried about me. there was a very intentional character to all this, as if some force of nature was conspiring to keep me from pissing.
my boyfriend came over again and again and i kept telling him to go away because i couldn't piss in front of him. my memory gets extremely fragmented at this point. because of the bird calls, the repeating music, and my perceived inability to piss, i began to believe that time was repeating itself and that the only way to get out of the loop would be to piss, change the music, and do something else that i forget.
i kept asking for the time, but i couldn't keep track of it, so i believed that we were skipping backwards and forwards in time. it seemed like whenever i asked for the time, it was almost 1 pm, and i believed that it would never actually be 1 pm. (this was about five hours into the trip). my thought process at this time was very strange and associative and i associated 1 pm with the concept of "oneness", 2 pm with the concept of duality and the two of us, 3 pm with the 3 things that i needed to do to escape. i was going on and on about this shit as well as something about finding the average between these numbers and how the average is equal to normal, sober experience, while drug trips and mental illness are statistical outliers (?).
i believed that i'd be able to stop tripping at 3 pm but i didn't think that 3 pm would come. i wasn't able to communicate to my boyfriend that i felt stuck in time. i just kept talking about the numbers and the average. i also believed that my boyfriend had direct access to my mind and i tried to talk to him about very subjective aspects of my experience, becoming extremely frustrated when he didn't understand me.
we changed the music. the lyrics of various songs seemed to be directly related to my immediate experience and to things that had happened before we started tripping. the latter was very disturbing to me because it made me believe that those things were part of the acid trip as well. the new music did nothing to change my perception of time. i kept hearing the bird calls. at one point i spit in my boyfriend's face because i thought that if i did something crazy i might be able to break out of the loop. he was crying and i thought he was crying because he knew we were trapped here too... his face was constantly morphing and he would shift from looking like a baby to an old man to a woman, from looking beautiful to looking incredibly ugly... i can't remember too much from this stage.
finally it was 3 pm and i suddenly understood that time had stopped looping. the visuals were far less prominent at this stage; i still had the weird associative headspace, though not as strongly. i wasn't entirely sure that i was coming down for a while. we walked home. at this point i could hardly remember anything from the later stages of the trip. i wondered why my boyfriend was acting strangely towards me and didn't realize why until he recounted what i had done. the memories have been coming back to me bit by bit and over the past few days i've been able to put it back together.
back at the house, i could see the ceiling moving in intricate patterns and some faint shifting patterns on fabrics. talking coherently was a bit hard. these effects continued until about 10 hours post-acid consumption. we eventually took some benzos and went to sleep.
reflections:
i experienced an odd aftereffect the next day: total appetite suppression. i had eaten nothing since friday evening and had no desire to eat until late sunday night. food seemed revolting. there were no other residual effects.
i'd like to experience lsd again... but not for a while and definitely at a lower dose.