Looking for general advice

[heron_trance]

Been with a girl for almost two years now, we're both about 20. She's anti drugs, for two reasons she's told me: image, and her concern for my well-being.
I've tried to explain my opinions, and we've come up with compromises in the past. For example that I could do weed occasionally, but not around her. I've also told her that I've taken ecstasy before, and that it wasn't harmful. This wasn't hard as I'm not a regular user of anything illegal. Only a handful in a large group of friends at uni has interests in experimenting with different drugs. I haven't broken this per se, but I might as well have, as if the situation had arisen where something was available I would have taken it.
Recently we were at a music festival together and I got a text from a mate saying he had a spare pill if I was interested, unfortunately my girlfriend read this and wasn't happy about it. It didn't mean much that I had no intention of taking anything as I was with her (which I understand). Soon after this we broke up, I basically told her this was a part of me, that I'm young, I want to experiment with different things while I can be forgiven, that I'm not going to be wanting to do this in 20 years when I have a job, kids etc. and don't want to get to a point where I regret not trying different things (and not just drugs). She was wanting me to make a choice between her and drugs, but that's not a decision I was happy to make. I didn't feel that should be a decision, and told her that I was sorry and wasn't going to make a choice. I likened this to someone saying "food or water?" - in essence I don't see why there needs to be a clear cut choice between the two. So she made the choice, and walked away.
This was about a week ago, after which it has been hard for both of us.
She asked me to drive her somewhere two days ago as she doesn't like driving and trusted me with her car, I did this for her. When we got back to mine, we talked about how we'd been, and I'm sure I don't need too much explanation to say we ended up having sex, which I think now has really complicated things for us. I think now, having been away from her for a little while, that at my current stage in life, being single has its advantages.

When she was over (after driving her), I told her this story:
In the last 6 or so months I've become good friends with someone who is similarly in a relationship with a girl who had initially told him he could do weed, not around her, and take ecstasy, but only at music festivals. Recently they'd broken up and got back together, that she no longer wanted him to do anything, with her or not, and that they were still talking through things.
and that seemed to make her see things differently (I could probably speculate why, but whatever), and the next day she asked me about which drugs I wanted to try, what their effects were, and how often I wanted to do them. I told her about LSD, MDMA, and weed. She was didn't like the sound of LSD, but was happy for me to use the latter two a few times a year. This is a big change for someone
I'm not sure I want this though. I'm not sure I want to have someone change their views to accommodate mine (or more likely, keep their views and make exceptions).
I guess that's one way people come out of their shell, so to speak. I was 'anti-drugs' till a friend I trusted offered me something, to which I googled a fair bit and decided I'd give it a go. I'm not sure I want to push someone who doesn't have that curiosity themselves.

She's not someone I can see myself marrying, she's very nice, and I have a lot of respect for her for all that she's been through. I just don't see that we're at similar stages in our lives, and feel that's she's quite naive.
I'm not even sure what I'm asking here, I think if I need to figure out if I want to be with her. I feel it'd be sad to end the relationship over something to me so trivial, but, as I pointed out above, it's not a relationship I can see myself in 10-20 years from now.

Really sorry about the wall of text, I'm sure things still aren't clear - I'm happy to clarify, thanks for any responses.
edit: also I'm not new to BL, not that it makes any difference, just don't post much and couldn't find old account details/don't have access to an email anymore.

 

[Lysis]

Although I side with your girlfriend on the issue, I don't think she should have high expectations, and I don't think she should stick around with an addict if drug use is that important to her. I think the idea of choosing a drug over a relationship is retarded, I also understand that if someone told me what I can and can't do, I'd be completely turned off and would tell them to GTFO.

You have to want to quit, and she should stop trying to control you. If she doesn't like drugs and doesn't want a drug user as a BF, then I put the blame on her for sticking around. 2 years is a long while to try to make you do something that you are not willing to do. You just don't care about her that much, and she should have realized this. I think the fault is on her for sticking around, because you seem to do what you want to do, which is your right, but it's on her to make her decision to leave and stay. Making ultimatums on drug users is dumb IMO. The only way to find a right fit is to not get serious with someone who does something (drugs in her case) that is entirely out of the question for you.

 

[hyroller]

If the real issue is a lack of lasting compatibility (and you're looking for a long-term relationship) then drugs aside, it's time to call it a day. (simple in theory, granted, but I can't tell you how to end things for good with this girl! but in terms of identifying where your real problem lies, it does sound like you're two very different individuals - and while opposites can initially attract for an initial period of time, sometimes there just isn't enough common ground to bind to two together.

after 2 years, you'd have enough knowledge to make that call - and assess whether or not staying in an intimate relationship together would actually benefit you both in a fulfilling, sympathetic manner.

all the best with it!