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Long Distance Friendship?

wooger

wooger

Bluelighter
Joined
Aug 3, 2005
Messages
765
Okay so someone I was very good friends with for he last 13 years (we are both 25!) seems to be moving to australia, he has already spent about 6 months there and plans to live their indefinitely

Anyway, he has come back over the chistmas for a few weeks and I have seen him for probably about 3 hours in 3 weeks.....

He seems more preoccupied with his other friends which I don't seem to be part of since his sister and I had a stupid drunken fight and I know he actively tries to keep me away from them....

given he is going to be away a whole year this time and shows little interest in spending any time with me, should I just place the friendship on the back burner and ignore him? I know for a fact he ignores my calls while hes back cus he is busy with his friends

is it time to say goodbye?
 
Is it time to say goodbye? It might be. It might not.

Moving on and away from things familiar, especially a strong and positive bond of friendship, is just the way that life leads us at times.

Keep in mind that in our mid-twenties many of us are still trying to find our way in the world during a time of sometimes great personal, financial, and socialized change.
 
^^ no, we wre jut best friends throughout school and several years afterwards...


Now he is back in our country I get a call from him when he is very bored but whenever there is anyone else around he doesnt seem to be interested in seeing me, like doesnt invite along etc, not that I really want to go, but it would be nice to be invited...

I just kinda feel that as I am on the back burner for him then maybe I should place him on my back burner? He knows I hate my birthday but I would bet you 1000 dolllars we hang out on my birthday... and I dont want to celebrate it... and he knows that do I think he just wants to out of a sense of duty or something?

I dnno

thats why im asking for imput really.
 
I have a friend who lives in California. We have never met in person. We met on a Teen Titans forum about nine years ago, where we found each other pretty cool and got IM addresses. About four years ago, we lost contact as I went to school to pursue other activities *coughdormingcollegestudentcough* and we did not talk for around three years.

We've since contacted and we're what I would call pretty good friends right now. We had a little bit of catch up to do, but things are right back on track and we plan on meeting sometime soon.

So as to answer your question, is it time to say good-bye? Never permanently. I'm still waiting patiently for my so-called best friend to get her act together. If she does, then our friendship can continue. I think, however, that you shouldn't wait up for him. Go about your own life and enjoy everyone that you can call a friend.
 
never make someone a priority if they only make you an option.

get more friends. friendships change and move and people you though were your best friends growing up can melt away into the background as you change through life.

keep your eyes open and put yourself in new situations and you'll always meet quality people along with the throwaway people who dont ever make more effort than a facade. thats why you need to keep going and keep the faith
 
Move on. Your friend obviously doesn't value your friendship. Time is too short to waste it.
 
thanlks for your comments people :)

we were supposed to hang out tonight but he blew me out again... said his toothache was soo bad he couldnt come round... fucking pissed off since I spent time cooking for him etc and he calls me 10 minutes after he was supposed to arrive saying he cant come...

since he seems to have all the visas he needs I doubt I will ever see him again..ahh that really sucks... I thought he was a true friend but I guess not.
 
Yeah, you don't have to call it quits, but just let go I guess. I know it hurts like hell when you want to stay close with "a mate" (I'm talkin' British for "friend" here) like that.

You never know, just chill, and thngs might come back around and you guys might run into each other again and "catch up" on old times you know. There's people I was friends with and we totally "fell out" and all that, but I ran into them again later and had great a time talking to them!
 
Shit like this happens. Happened to me not too long ago. Friends even great friends outgrow each other and take different paths in life. Its sad but inevitable. Just don't take it too personally. He is just trying to figure out who he is and I'm sure you're doing the same. Maybe have one last drink with him or whatever and say goodbye for now. Who knows? Maybe one day he will remember what it was like in the good ole days and you'll be best buds again.
 
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